Mad as a Hatter, Thin as a Dime

Brown eyes wide and in a trance, Ryan Ross couldn’t tear his attention from the glossy magazine page in front of him. No, he was not usually the type to get mindlessly lost in over-exaggerated journalism, but this was different. She was adorning this tabloid spread. If Alternative Press can even be considered a tabloid. He was sinking deeper and deeper into his thoughts of how perfect she was. Not only in beauty, but also in mind. Yes, it is true. Even celebrities can have celebrity crushes, and he was a hell of a lot more famous than she was. He wasn’t stupid or ignorant. He knew that the photograph he was staring at had probably been edited to this perfection, but in his mind she’d always look this beautiful.

She was tall; probably around the same height as him, if he had to guess. She wasn’t ridiculously thin, but she was nowhere near overweight. She was perfectly proportioned for her height. Her deep red hair was very long and straight, falling elegantly to her waist. Her skin was tinged with the slightest tan, but at first glance she was a pale girl. In this particular shoot, she was wearing emerald green skinny jeans and a simple white t-shirt with a big black heart printed on the front. Green jewelry decorated her neck and wrists, and classic black converse sat snug on her feet. Four guys stood with her, all pulling a different facial expression. But the best part of the picture was her face. It was oval-shaped, and her hazel eyes were set in perfect almond shapes either side of her button-like nose. Her cheeks were tinted rose, as were her smirking lips, and the few light freckles spread across her cheekbones were barely there. Her eyebrows were perfectly sculpted, but the tops of them disappeared under the fringe that cut directly across her forehead. In this picture, her face was turned slightly to the right and the camera angle from about the same level as her knees made her and the guys seem somewhat superior and intimidating, but not in a cocky way. More like they had a secret that no one else knew. How Ryan wished he could be in on that secret…

Feign Eloquence.

That’s what was printed in bright yellow lettering under the picture. He wondered if she was the one who suggested that name for the band, or if it was one of the others.

“Dude, you’re drooling.”

Ryan immediately brought a hand to his lips to expel any excess saliva, but there was none. Brendon started laughing.

“Shut up,” Ryan mumbled, closing the magazine to find a picture of himself and his three best friends on the cover.

Brendon’s laughter ended when Ryan pegged the magazine at his shoulder.

“Ooh, violence,” Brendon smirked as he fumbled and caught the magazine. “What were you looking at, anyway?”

“The Feign Eloquence article,” Ryan murmured. As often, he cursed himself for not just lying.

“Dude, this obsession is beginning to rival your high school Blink 182 one.”

“Hey, you were obsessed with Blink even more than I was,” Ryan defended, crossing his arms. Now that they were friends with Mark Hoppus, it had become somewhat embarrassing to bring that up.

“Whatever,” Brendon brushed off. “The point is that this is probably the twentieth time today you’ve played their CD over again and the rest of us are getting sick of it. You don’t even usually like this kind of power-pop music.”

“Sure I do,” He mumbled, unable to think of another band quite like this that he listened to. The truth was, he just liked listening to her voice. “Anyway, if you want I’ll just listen to my iPod.”

“Okay, thanks man. Oh, and uh, you’re going to kill me for not mentioning this sooner, but… It’s just that… You see, the thing is…”

“What is it, Bren?” Ryan’s eyes narrowed suspiciously.

“Pete says we’re meeting Feign Eloquence tonight at eight. Bye!”

Brendon spoke so fast the words almost blurred and he had disappeared before Ryan could get pissed off at him. The older boy was shocked. Tonight? But they didn’t start touring with them for two weeks! He thought he had a fortnight to prepare himself for meeting the girl he’d been crushing on for the past month, and now he had to meet her tonight?!

Fuck you, Brendon.

Hurriedly, he ran upstairs to try and find something good to wear, the sounds of his best friends’ casual laughter echoing from the back yard of his old home.