Had My Heart on Lockdown

‘No, leave me alone, I’m not going to dance with you, Mike, it’s just not happening… because we don’t make a good couple… why should I care? Go dance with Chissy…’ I muttered, trying to swat Mike away with my hands, batting him in the face and smiling triumphantly.

As soon as Mike had disappeared into the faded obscurity of my peripheral vision, I looked around, trying to locate who I was looking for. Her auburn hair caught my attention, flowing down the back of her hoodie. I didn’t understand why she was looking away from me…surely she was looking for me?

I frowned, trying to cry out her name, to get her attention, but it didn’t work, her gaze stayed locked in front of her, away from me.

I started to walk over to her, blindly throwing my arms out, trying to grab her, but she kept slipping away; like smoke through my fingers.

I stopped suddenly when a noise entered my consciousness…it was a phone…

I couldn’t see a phone anywhere, but it seemed to be getting louder, my head was going to implode any second, I could feel it.

With startling speed, my surroundings changed. I was on my sofa, in my living room, no hint of the strange blurred reality of before. I almost laughed out loud; a dream.

I leaned back, my head against the soft cushions adorning my sofa and clamped my eyes shut again, willing sleep to come back. It didn’t, and within a few seconds, I understood why…the phone was still ringing.

I reached over to the coffee table, looking at the caller id and pressing it to my ear.

‘Hello, my friend,’ I mumbled tiredly, rubbing my eyes to try and wake myself up.

‘Adam? Were you still asleep?’

‘Bilvy, what time is it?’ I asked, fully prepared to give him a lecture on sleep deprivation.

‘Half 3,’ came his prompt answer. Oh.

‘Well then no I wasn’t asleep, just resting my eyes,’ I replied, smiling.

‘Yeah, like you didn’t try to use that excuse in tenth grade history lessons.’

‘You can’t blame a guy for trying,’ I shrugged.

‘Anyway, we’re having a band practise over here at 4, that ok?’

‘Oo, band practice? That’s so old school. Normally we’re all posh and businessy now,’ I cried excitedly, jumping off the sofa and attempting to slide on some sneakers, stamping a few times before I could push my feet into them. ‘I’ll see you in a bit.’

With that, I hung up and got all my stuff organised, before jumping in my car and driving to Bilvy’s.

- - - - -

‘Sisky?’ I blinked as Mike waved his hand in front of my face, looking up at him questioningly. ‘What’s the matter with you? That’s like, the seventh time you’ve tuned out since you got here.’

‘Oh…err…nothing,’ I muttered, ducking my head down to as though giving my bass my full attention. In actual fact, I was incredibly distracted; something about the dream worried me. Why did I care so much if I saw Isla again?

I couldn’t explain it, it was almost like a compulsion, I needed to see her, to check if she was alright.

There was a such huge contrast between the Isla I’d known in high school and the Isla I’d seen last night, I almost didn’t want to admit it was her, but I couldn’t deny it.

Despite how hard I tried not to be, I was almost perpetually distracted…trying to find ways that it would be possible to see her again, instead of focussing on the practice everyone else was doing, and in theory, I should have been doing too.

I kept drawing a complete blank, my mind wandering back to the diner where she’d been last night. I knew that was my only chance. I had no idea where she lived or where she worked, so I resolved to return to the diner the same time that night, just in case she decided she needed another late night coffee.

I could feel the hope building inside me, no matter how weak the chance was of me seeing her, I knew I had to try.