Had My Heart on Lockdown

Over the next couple of days, the only thing that was on my mind was Isla. Try as I might to forget her, it didn’t happen. It was as though my mind was trying to make me remember her and to make me constantly on edge thinking about her.

I sat in my apartment, staring at the dark brown liquid that sat in the ceramic mug. It was nothing interesting, I was barely even looking at it, and barely even noticing it was there.

- - -

‘Taylor!’ Her sweet voice rang out. I smiled at the use of my nickname, when we were 11 she decided she wasn’t going to refer to me as my first name, Adam, but as my middle name, Taylor. According to her, Taylor had more of a ‘ring’ to it.

We were only fourteen and friends, we knew everything there was to know about each other. Best friends.

‘Yeah Isla?’ I asked, looking over at her, her thick, auburn hair shimmered in the immense sunlight.

‘Nothing,’ she giggled lightly, ‘I just wanted you to talk.'

Typical Isla, always happy, always wanting to make people as cheerful as she was. It was why she was my best friend.

I smiled at her before looking off into the distance, we were in Langendorf Park, it was a Saturday afternoon and we were cloud watching. It was something we both loved to do and we would be in the park all day, sometimes until the sun went down. It was my favourite thing to do.

- - -

Suddenly, I had to see her. But how? I didn’t know anything about her anymore; I didn’t know where she lived, her phone number.

The only thing I had was the diner. The diner where I saw her again.

I’d made up my mind, I was going to the diner again, it was a long shot, but I had to try. I couldn’t let this amazing girl out of my life for a second time.

Acting purely on impulse, I grabbed by hoodie, slid on my shoes and left in the direction of the diner.

Walking down the streets calmed my nerves somewhat, although, my heart was still pounding hard enough that I could hear it in my ears. The calm breeze that flew through the air complimented the warmth of the sun’s rays that radiated down; I didn’t feel the need for my hoodie, carrying it in my right hand as I walked.

Within minutes, I was outside the diner. The drab once-white panels reflected the sun’s rays; I walked up to the door and pushed it open with ease.

The bell above the door rang, alerting the two people already inside and the waitress to my presence.

Swiftly and quietly, I made my way over and sat in a booth. I slid right along the plastic surface so I was resting up against the window. I let my head lull and rest against the cool surface of the glass.

After waiting for nearly two hours, I was beginning to lose hope; I grabbed my discarded hoodie and finished the last of my sixth coffee. I began to get up, brushing myself down.

Sadness overwhelmed me, I'd had the tiniest slither of hope, I really thought she would turn up.

I turned away from the table, when the bell above the door sounded. I looked up, and there she was. What I’d been waiting for, Isla.

Quickly, I sat back down in the booth. She sat in exactly the same place she had only days before. She was hunched over the cup of coffee, her body language made it seem as though she was sad. I watched for about 20 minutes before realising I should go and talk to her.

All of the anticipation and waiting made me suddenly nervous.

What if she didn’t remember me?

What if she didn’t want to talk to me?

What was I supposed to say to her?!

I closed my eyes in a vain attempt to calm myself down. I slid down the seat, trying to construct some sort of conversation starter. Anything so I could go and talk to her.

My mind was reeling, I couldn’t think of anything that didn’t sound mildly stupid or make me seem like a complete and utter stalker.

Finally, I thought of something I could say to her. It wasn’t much, but it couldn’t make me sound stupid. It was the simplest form of greeting known. Hello.

I heard the bell above the door sound again, and my eyes snapped open. She was gone. The space she was in only minutes ago was now empty, lacking the warmth that her body provided.

I jumped out of my seat, and I ran out of the door. She was nowhere to be seen. I looked to the left, to the right and then to the left again. I couldn’t see her. I tried and failed to mask the sadness I felt.