Singular Indestructible Droid

Everything was so relaxed now. Everyone was just sitting there chilling, watching Manning and Chris fight about Halo 3. Laughing at each others stupid jokes about what happened on tour. Including Bamboozle. Mia would laugh and bounce on my lap joining in on the hilarious moments of anything, really. Every time they said my name and Bamboozle, I would tense up and squeeze Mia's sides as a reaction. Mia would rub my arms that were wrapped around her, helping me to relax. But thankfully no one brought up anything about my public drunkard debacles. They said not one word.
Mia and I, though we had been getting mighty close, we weren't a thing. She had been there to talk to me when I couldn't talk to the guys. I swear she should when I couldn't talk to the guys. I swear she should have been a therapist. It was slightly fun though. We would get coffee together, or we would snuggle together on the couch. But most of the time, other than getting coffee, we weren't even talking. Most of the time we were like this. Her comfortably in my arms or in my lap. But I knew it was that we both needed the comfort.
Mia had recently broken up with Matt and her best friend Kristen was a slight rebound. Not by much though. But Mia didn't mind this. To tell you the truth, she could give a hot damn. I knew it hurt her. Mainly cause she couldn't help to stare at Matt kissing Kristen. I knew she missed Matt's passionate love that he now shared with Kristen. She even confided in me saying that it seemed like Matt kissed Kristen with more love that he had ever done with her But as the days went on she gradually got over it. I wondered why I couldn't get over Mel like Mia was doing. Oh. Haha. Matt wasn't brutally murdered.

"Derek," Said MIa, softly shaking me out of my thoughts. "Dare, babe, I got to work."

"No, don't leave me with them." I said grasping her wrist tightly.
"I got to go. Linda is down there working by herself. And you know Saturdays are the worst babe." She ran a hand down my face as if trying to calm me.

"Please, just a little longer?" I whined keeping her warm hand against my cheek. "Their not riled up anymore and you know their going to get mushy and shit. You know I'll probably go insane."

"I know, but I have to go,"

"Fine, go then."

"Don't get mad." Mia flicked my nose. Ow it hurt. "I love you. Bye."

"Bye jerk," I gave her a quick peck on the lips before she got up and said good night to everybody. She even ran a quick hand through Kristen's hair. God I love that girl.

Now I was sitting in a chair, compa-, partner-, girl-, I was just less basically And just how I predicted it they were all lovey dovey.
You know the kissing, the smiling against each others lips, the intimate whispers, blah, blah, blah. You know the whole shabang. Ugh, I wanted to gouge my fucking eyes out.

"So are you and Mia a thing now?" Asked, out of people, Matt. Except it was hard trying to hear him over Kristen's loud giggles. How could he ask a question while tickling Kristen?

"What? I can't hear you. Your giggling too loud!"

"Huh Derek?"

Thump.

"I wanted for you to tickle me less jerk."

"Derek!"

"What? Huh," I said nearly jumping out of my chair.

"I asked if you and Mia were going out." I averted my vision to Matt. Oh he was talking to me.

"Oh no, we're not. No, no," I mumbled.

"Are you okay? You look a little sweaty there D." Asked Manning.

"Oh I'm fine," I wiped the sweat off my forehead. Oh shit, why was there blood on my hand? I blinked. Okay, it was sweat. "I need to go to the bathroom.

I hastily walked to the bathroom and shut it once I slipped my body through the door.
Ah, I was going to puke. I didn't know why though. Every time I got a flash back thingies, my hands would shake, I'd sweat profusely, and I'd lose focus. Almost as if I was going back to that exact moment in time.
This. Needed. To. Stop.
I splashed water on my face to wash away the cover of sweat. How was I going to walk out there and sit among them like everything was okay. But nothing was okay.
Now, I had my mind made up. I wasn't going to sit with them because I knew I couldn't handle it. More than likely, I would have another episode. I couldn't let them see or know about them. I would guess it be pride. I don't know. Truthfully I didn't know anything anymore. But right now my subconscious was going to do it.
I wiped my face off and put my glasses back on before walking out the door. Shit, I didn't think of an explanation as to why I needed to go. Okay this is what I was going to do. Hah wow, me talking to myself, devising a plan just to get out of my friends place. Nice. Now I know I'm crazy.
As soon as I walked out of the hallway and into the living room, I couldn't have made myself look more of an ass. Somehow I managed to trip over my own feet, their feet I didn't get it.

"Hey Derek, where are you going?" Asked Chris. I now noticed that his girl friend Emerie were lying down on the floor. They were comfortable-looking with Chris's hands entwined with Emerie's on her stomach.

"Is this okay?

"Yes," She whispered. "I love you."

"Derek!" Shouted Chris.

"Yes." I said jumping out of my memory. Literally.

"Dude, you have got to stop doing that."

"Doing what." I aksed.

"That fading in and out deal," He explained as I stuffed my car keys and my wallet in my pockets. "And then like jumping up and having that look on your face like you just got your junk pulled on by some ugly tranny."

The whole group laughed while I stood there like "what the fuck?"

"Whatever man, I gotta go."

"Dude where in Buddha's name are you going know where he's going." Manning added.

"Oh yeah, I do." Said Matt.

"Okay smart asses, I have to go."

"Wear protection when fucking Mia! If you knock her up she'll kick you ass!" Kristen called out from behind me as I shut the door.

I Had to do something. This was aggravating and now the guys noticed? Shit. I hate Jack with all of my being. None of these racing thought, sudden flash backs, and this underground panic feelings wouldn't have happened if it weren't for him... For me.
If I could turn back time just to change everything I would. I would stop myself from going to that party, fucking Deborah. Most of all meeting her. I wish, from what I know now, that I didn't take interest in her that day in the office. I even wish that I acted like a jackass so she would hate me. Maybe then her life would have been spared.
I don't know. I don't know anymore. What I did know was that something had to give. Something had to help this out. Just stop everything. I knew what that something was. The only thing was, it wasn't permanent.
I walked through the door of Mia's bar that was only a good five to ten minuet walk from Matt's apartment. Once I walked through the second door the loud thumping of dance music filled my ears. But once I got half way through the bar towards the quiet part, immediately I was greeted with a smile that made me feel slightly better.

"Hey hot stuff! What are you drinking tonight?" Said the swanky bartender that was my Mia.

"Babe, you know my usual line up." I playfully flirted.

"Bailey's on the rocks?"

"Yes, ma'am,"

"You got it," She turned away from me for a second to get to the bottle. "What are you doing here?"

"Mia, baby, you know I couldn't have made it without you there." She slid the glass right into my hand. Mmmm.... Tasty.

"I know that. But really why are you here?"

"I don't know, I saw Matt-"

"Um excuse me bartender, get me a margarita." Demanded this chick who sat nezt to me.

I saw Mia's eye twitch as she walked away to get her drink.

"So Mr. I Look Like Hot Sex. What's your name?" I heard the girl aske me.

I turned to her to say something smart to shoo her off, but her looks. The just stopped me.
She was a slightly over tanned, Paris Hilton look-a-like. but better. Fuckable. She wore a a halter top, where the neck line plunged to her waist. Giving me easy glimpses of her breasts. She wore a matching white mini skirt. Fuck yeah, easy access.

"My names Derek," I replied back as smoothly as I could. She had medium slanted eyes that were blue. She had a regular nose but her lips were all the rage. But something about her looked so familiar. "Can I ask you question? Why do you loo so familiar?"

"Well my name is Jill. Does that ring any bells?"

"Here's you r margarita," Mia interrupted. She shot me a look before walking away.

"Bout time she came with my drink,"

"Jill, so familiar." I pondered.

"Didn't we go to high school together?"

"Yes we did." Oh Jill. That bitch who would help Pan torment... Her. It's okay though. I have to move on. Right?

"Well now that we know who we are, can I ask you a question?" She said while rubbing her foot slowly against my leg.

"What question would that be?"

"Tell me something Derek. Have you ever tasted a drink as sour as a margarita? Especially the crystals?"

"No I don't think I have,"

"Well," Jill ran a finger over the top of her cup, wiping away the crystals. She then put them on her stomach, all the way between her breasts. "Would you like to see how sour they are?"

I smirked as I leaned forward proceed to lick of the crystals. As I licked her soft skin I wiggled my tongue to surely set her off. When got to the last part of the trail, I bit the skin in between her chest. And that's when she moaned.

"I have another question for you Miss Jill." At the same time I moved head to whisper in her ear.

"Now what's that?" She moaned out a question.

"How sour are you? And can I get a taste?"

"But I think that was two questions. "

"Funny thing is you're not sour at all." Her eyes lolied around as they looked into mine. "How about we go finish this in the bathroom?"

"That sounds pretty good."

"Let's go then,"

I Pulled her up from the bar stool and started to lead her through the crowd.
Now it was time for my sometimes weekly rehab. I chuckled to myself. I wasn't drunk at all but fucking chicks was my other way of releasing. You could even say coping. It was whatever.
Once we got past the crowd and into the hallway, I started to run a little with her hand still in mine. I dug around in my pocket for my keys Mia had given a key for what she called the V.I.P bathrooms. Really they were just employee restrooms. More private I guess.
As soon as I got to the "V.I.P bathroom and I had the key in my hand, I shoved it in the lock. Of course with that collision. Jill had pushed me into the door. Seriously making it harder to open. But it was okay. Mainly cause she was all over me.

"Come on, Derek! Hurry up," Jill moaned in my ear. I felt her hands run in my shirt and other places as well.

"I'm trying," I grunted.

"Derek!"

"Open," I breathed a sign of relief as the door swung open. Now for my rehab. Therapy. "Get in there," I took her hands out of my pants and threw her into the room. It made me laugh to see her stumble and fall to the floor. But right now I would rather fuck her than laugh at her.

I pulled my wallet out of my pocket and retrieved the condom.

"Derek." I heard Jill moan. "Fuck me,"

I knew I couldn't hit her and I sure as hell didn't want to kill her. So this was the only way.

"How do you like this?" The words sounded weird as they rumbled out of my mouth.

"Derek. Uh too hard," She moaned.

"What too hard like this?" I showed her what I meant by too hard. Her screams started to fill the bathroom.

I laughed at what I thought was her pain. "Yeah, scream for me baby. What's my name?"

"Same my name."

"D-D-erek,"

I shook the flash back out of my head.

"Come on, say it!"

"Derek," a whisper filled my ears. I couldn't hear Jill's screams anymore.

When i meant to look at myself but instead I saw her. She was looking at me with dead green eyes. Mel- she looked like I found her. Blood matted hair, blood stained clothes, and a busted lip. Oh shit.
I stumbled back, coming out of Jill. Nausea started to sweep over me as that scene kept flicking over and over in my head.

"You probably think I'm a monster, don't you?"

"No I don't think you're a monster."

"Get out of my head Melody!" I screamed.

"Derek, are you okay?" Jill asked as she walked toward me.

Something was wrong through. Her form kept switching back between her own and Melody's.

"Get away from me."

"What?"

"Get out!" I roared. I was freaking out now, walking around in circles. With my stuff hanging out, of course.

"Derek," I turned to face where the whisper came from.

It was her again. The same sickly figure that I saw in the mirror. Now she was walking toward me. Bloody hands stretched out towards me, spreading the smell of death.

"Derek, why?" She whispered. "Derek I'm sorry. Do you still love me?"

"Yes babe. I love you so much."

"Derek, help me."

"How?" I pleaded. I was so confused.

Suddenly shw as in front of me, bloody hands gripping my face.

" I can have kids."

"You lied to me."

"Thanks now I'm wet."

"Do you hate me?"

"You're not supposed to be here."

"I missed you so much."

"Derek, I love you so much."

Subliminal messages raced through my mind. They were memories of us together. And some I think were of how she died. It was so intense my body started to shake violently and my muscles would contract. I was losing it.

"Derek!" A familiar voice kept screaming. I tried to focus on who was screaming. "Derek, come back to me!"

"Mia, Mia, Mia," I mumbled over and over again.

"I'm right her baby, I'm right here." I felt her wrap me in her arms and rock me softly."

"Mia,"

"What babe?" She cooed softly.

"She's still here.... And she stills needs me."