Hate, Love, and Sex Appeal

I sat in my air conditioned room and colored. I wanted Frankie to wake up soon so I could ask him to come to the other boardwalk with me. I put the right shading of shadowing on my picture and, tada, it was done. I had drawn a picture of the pier with the sun setting in the background. Wasn't exactly like the real sunset, I wasn't able to capture that feel just yet but it was good enough. I tugged on Logan's sweatshirt to block the coldness from continuing to penetrate through my skin.

Gerard's art pad caught my eye. Curiosity just bit me in the ass. I wanted to know what he was drawing the night I had my panic attack. He had never bothered to tell me. I wasn't really the snooping type but now that I had myself convinced, I had to know.
I flipped through and found superheros, nothing I haven't seen before. A few pages more and still nothing special.
Wait. I saw something as I skipped a few more pages.

He drew...me. He drew me. Wow, did one hell of a job. It looked exactly like me. I was smiling in it too. There was a faceless boy holding my hand and a wicked looking devil above me and the boy. Who was the boy? I have to admit...this was picture was done pretty damn well.
I admired it for a few moments and then placed it back the exact way I had found it to avoid being caught. I got dressed and applied a quick layer of eyeliner.
I yanked the door open and, as if on cue, Frankie came out his room fully dressed.
"Psst...hey Frankie...wanna check out the other boardwalk with me?"
"Yeah, sure,let's go," said Frankie as he pulled on his other fingerless glove.

It was still early, almost seven o'clock. He slid down the banister with ease as I quietly went down the stairs.
"Hey, when'd you learn that?" I whispered.
"Nothing to it," replied Frank.

We went out the back door and found Gerard still sitting where I had left him.
"Hey...mornin' Gee."
Gerard looked over and smirked at the sight of me.
"Hey Frank. Hey dollface, you never answered my question. Rude, no? I answered yours," said Gerard, smugly.
"Come on, Frankie, can we go?" I asked Frank ignoring Gerard's snide comment.
"Yeah, sure."
I could sense uncertainty in his voice. He sensed something was up.
"Where ya goin'?"
"Where you aren't." I replied shortly.
"You still haven't answered. Unsure of your answer?"
Frankie didn't speak, fully knowing that I'd explain what Gerard was babbling about. We reached the stairs leading all the way down to the boardwalk. The ocean was rough and different shades of grey had captured the sky. It didn't look like pleasant weather. My favorite kind.
"So...wanna tell me what's up?"
"Do you know why he's been so nice to me lately?" I asked curiously.
"Well....because he wanted to show you that side of him. You know? He sees how you are with Logan, Bri, he's jealous. I told you that. He doesn't want you to completely hate him."
I shrugged as we started walking the straight away of the boardwalk.

"Bri, why?"
"Just curious. Kind of a drastic change."
"Bri, what else? C'mon just spill."
"I don't know. It's just...I was on the verge of being able to stand being in the same room and he just--" I said as I sighed.

He stopped walking and grabbed my wrists to pull me around.
He didn't need any words. That stare broke me completely. That famous Iero glare always had a way to infiltrate me.
"He..um..he..kind of..kissed me last night," I said as I scrunched up my face in embarrassment and turned away from his gaze.
"He what?"
"Frankie, don't make me say it again."
"Okay..then..what was his question?"
I let out another quick sigh before I replied.
"He asked if I regret kissing him back."

I did everything to avoid his look. He paused for a minute and continued to look at me.
"Why are you so embarrassed to tell me? It's just me, Bri, just Frankie."
"I dunno...because I dunno, it's embarrassing to talk about."
"Well don't worry about being embarrassed around me. I'm not gunna judge you. It's just me. You know I love ya no matter what you do. So..you kissed him back?"
We started to walk again as I answered.
"He wouldn't let me up, Frankie, what could I have done?"

"Are you embarrassed to tell me because you don't regret it?"
I stopped dead in my tracks.

"Whoa, what? No."

I think...

"Don't try lying, Bri. I know you too well for that."

We once again started to walk and we had finally reached the end five minutes later in complete silence.
"I...have no idea. I mean, I was actually being able to stand him and he made me laugh. God, you're gunna hold this one over on me but I was actually beginning to like him. Not like like him. But you get the point."
"So, if he put you in the same position right now as he did last night, what would you do?"
I thought for a minute and let the truth sink in.

"Fuck, Frank..I don't know. I mean I like Logan and I don't want to screw that up because Gerard is jealous."
He was leaning in the corner where the two ends met. I went over and rested my head against the shoulder and he hugged me in reassurance.
"God, I really don't know what I'd do."

Oh...but I did.