I'm Not Bulletproof

There has been complete silence in our room. Not a word has been said, not even a slight cough.

I hope I didn’t fuck any of this up by yelling at him. I mean, he was the one who started it.

“Triinu!”

Both Alexi and I jump up.

“Where are you?!” I hear my sister yell, “oh my god, I need your help.”

“What did you do this time?” I say rather calmly.

“There’s this big girl who wants to fight me at school,”

“Then stay home tomorrow,” I say.

“She’s gonna be at the park tonight, that’s where my boyfriend and I are going,” she explains. We haven’t been here for a little over a week and she has a boyfriend already?!

“Then don’t go,”

“But I have to!” Katerzyna whines.

“What do you want me to do about it?!”

“Confront her?”

“No, I already told you that I am never going to fight your battles again, I’m done with that,”

“But Triinu!”

“Go away! I might catch an STD from you,” I say. I have no respect for my sister if you can’t tell.

“Fine, be a bitch,” she stomps down the hall.

I have to admit I feel kind of bad for letting my sister get her ass beat, but she probably did something to deserve it.

“You used to fight for her?” Alexi finally says something.

“Yeah back when she was twelve and I was fourteen, she used to talk shit, and I would fight for her. But I’ve moved on,” I explain.

“That’s smart of you,” he pauses, “I bet your brothers are tough in a fight,”

I smile, “you should see them, it’s actually sort of scary,”

I remember when Braydon cheated on me for the third time, Dimitri fought him and for the last time, Dominik fought him.

He was in the hospital. He totally deserved it though.

“I feel guilty for leaving Katerzyna though,” I say quietly. Even though she earns to get beat up for ruining my life, I feel like I should be a good sister and help her out.

But at the same time I want to fight my own sister. I want to see her face and hear her screams.

Sadistic much?

“You’re shaking,” he says and places his left arm around my shoulders. I guess I am shaking; it’s probably because I have all this adrenaline flowing at the thought of hurting my sister. Revenge would be nice but the consequences would be unbearable.

A little over a year ago, Dimitri and I fought. He pushed me onto the coffee table and broke it. I was almost kicked out of the house; I forget what his punishment was.

Not nearly as severe as mine, I always get the worst punishment.

But can you imagine the punishment if I fight Katerzyna here at the Laiho’s? My parents would probably slit my throat.

“Don’t feel that way. Didn’t you want to kill you sister anyways?”

“…yes,”

“Then she’s got what is coming to her,”

Alexi has a good point. In the past she stole money from this one girl, had sex with another girl’s boyfriend, started rumors about people, and the list goes on.

She is going to get what’s coming to her. Karma hurts.

“I say you call your brothers and give them a heads up,” Alexi suggests.

“I can, but I don’t want to,”

“Do what you gotta do,” he says and walks out of the room.

I remain on the bed as I hear the front door slam.

What did I do this time? Is he still mad about before?

Should I go talk to him? Maybe explain myself a little more or just lie. I could say that now that I’ve known him for a little longer, he is actually really nice.

But I hate lying. In the end you just get caught up in the lie.

I guess it’s one way to learn your lesson. But for others, it’s just another part of life.

I hear heavy footsteps coming up the stairs. I don’t even have to think about whom they belong to. I already know.

“Triinu, do you have a light?” Alexi asks me.

“Maybe I don’t smoke,” I say.

“I know you do, I’ve seen you!” he smiles.

“You got me…” I pick my bag up and hand him my green and blue lighter.

“Thanks,” he says and leaves the room once again.

Usually people ask if you’d like to smoke with them. Maybe it’s different in Finland. Or maybe Alexi is just rude.

I sigh in frustration. Is he ever going to warm up to me?

I mean he pretty much knows everything about me, and I know his one secret.

Shouldn’t we be best of friends?

Obviously not.