The Sick Among the Pure

It was cold and I was shaking but sweating at the same time. It took me a while to get my eyes open because it felt as if they were glued together. I felt like vomiting but decided to take deep breaths to make it go away. I looked around and I was definitely not on the tour bus anymore. "Fuck" I cursed to myself as I realized it was a hospital. Then I remembered what happened.

"So, before you don't mention anything...how was it?" Trent asked Maynard with a smirk. It was early in the morning, I took my morning after pill and I was feeling like shit. "How was what?" a small smile formed on his face. "Was it that loud?" he asked again. "You have no idea...sounded like you were having the time of your life!" Trent let out a laugh. They didn't know I could hear and see everything, but it was hard not to listen. "It was okay, nothing special, just sex. She said she needed a new addiction. I'll keep on fucking her, she'll stop the coke. It's that easy." Maynard replied in a cocky tone. I was having a hard time believing that he actually said that. I feel like getting to know him even more is turning him into an asshole. Trent nodded and all of a sudden looked in my direction. I quickly poked my head back in the bunk bed and covered myself with the blanket. I couldn't not cry, I didn't know what to think. I was used, made a fool of, and completely treated like trash. I promised myself only a bag a day, but three seemed more like it. I snorted it all and waited to be happy, for it to stop the tears. I started sweating a lot more than usual and my vision was getting blurry. "Shit!" I yelled loudly forgetting everyone else. I had forgotten that I taken the morning after pill and I was stupid not to even think about them mixing. A sharp pain went through my body and I knew I needed to get out. I slowly grabbed on to the latter but it felt like my brain wasn't working anymore. My hand slipped away from it and I fell.

I needed to get out of the hospital, I was attached to everything including oxygen. I started to pul everything away from me, including the needles which hurt like fuck. Something started beeping quickly and a nurse came running putting everything back on. "Miss calm down!" she tried pinning me down but I fought back. "Can I get some help!" she yelled and immediately Trent and Maynard came in, pushing me down completely so I couldn't fight back. "Let me go! I don't need to be here!" I yelled and felt a sharp pain in my hand, seeing it was a needle again. "Stop it Maxinne! Just stop it! Stop fucking everything up!" Maynard burst immediately shutting me up. I knew he wouldn't be able to control himself, so he turned around and left the small room. The nurse followed and Trent stayed behind. He was pacing back and forth, I had no idea why he wanted himself to get involved in this. "You overdosed, you know that right?" he gave me a look. "I figured, I didn't even take much." Tears were piling up in my eyes. "Listen, I don't know how to tell you this...but the doctor said you kind of fucked up your uterus..." He took a small pause, he was holding his breath in as he waited for my reaction. "It's alright..." I said and slowly burst into tears "...I didn't want any kids any-- way" at this point I couldn't stop crying. It really upset me that one small mistake like that could have fucked me up for life. I turned away from Trent and just cried, cried everything that was inside of me out. "Max it doesn't necessarily mean you can't have kids, you just have to be careful about yourself" He sat down next to me and tried to comfort me. "Can you get me out of here?" I asked still sobbing. "Yeah, let me get Maynard though..." He started to get up but I grabbed his arm and pulled back down. "I don't wanna see him, he fucking completely hates me." I said eyeing the needles in my hands, it was making me sick. "That's nonsense, he cares a lot about you. I know he can be an asshole sometimes but that's just him..." Trent tried to convince me but it wasn't working. "Trent, I heard your fucking conversation about us having sex! Don't tell me he cares!" he looked down not really knowing what to say. "I'll get the nurse to get that shit off you" he said and left.

Back on the bus things turned really awkward, and I mean so awkward no one said anything for the longest time. Maynard looked pissed off at me and every chance he had he would glare at me or roll his eyes. They forced me to stay in Maynard's bus so he could watch over me. Before everyone got settled in, Trent pulled me to the back of the bus to talk. "I'm leaving today..." he said with his hands crossed. "And when I thought shit couldn't get any worse it does!" I said upset. "Don't worry kid, you can survive without me. I'll tell Maynard to chill." he said extending his hand and rubbing my arm in comfort. "I don't think I can to be honest, you've been the only nice person to me on this tour. Sadly you've only been here a couple of days." I looked down upset. "Seems like you're getting attached way too quickly to me, Max. I don't know what to quite think of that..."He gave me a smirk and squeezed my waist like he did once before. "Don't get your head too big, it means completely nothing because I'm actually not getting attached. You're just way too nice and understanding compared to everyone else on this bus." I said observing him. "Yeah right! I'll see you around Maxinne" he replied with a smirk and headed towards the living room where everyone was. Only couple more days of this and it will be done. So much for my first tour being a blast, it made me not want to tour ever again.