It's the Most Terrible Time of the Year

Did you know that during the holidays the suicide rate increases by fifty-percent?
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It's a nifty little fact I picked up.

I guess some people suddenly wake up and realize how pathetic their lives really are. Finding yourself alone on Christmas morning isn’t exactly an ideal way to start off the day especially when you know everyone else is practically glowing with Christmas cheer.

It's sickening.

Christmas is right around the corner. Every niche of every store on every street I seem to pass was covered with bright excessive decorations that even my grandma would be able to see clearly without the help of her over-sized glasses.

The effort that people put into all of this for one silly holiday was ridiculous. Just thinking about it was beginning to give me a headache.

As you couldn’t tell already I’m not a big fan of the holidays. Especially Christmas. I guess I could be classified as the Ebenezer Scrooge of our generation. Except I wasn’t a grouchy old man, on the contrary I was a twenty-something year old female. And I didn’t go around yelling “Bah, humbug!” every time something pissed me off.

The sight of the over-lavished streets and stores made me want to scream just that at every smiling person that seemed to rub their Christmas cheer in my face. Sadly this walk wasn’t making me feel better like I had hoped.

You see, my roommates had taken it upon themselves to trash the entire apartment with decorations thinking it would be a nice thing to do before they all left to spend Christmas with their families.

Wrong!

I lied and said I appreciated it when all I really wanted to do set our apartment on fire, which is why I was now aimlessly walking down the busy streets, seeming out of place with a grimace smeared on my face.

Even though I didn't really care about Christmas I'm pretty sure I didn't want to be locked up in some jail cell for arson.

After having enough of the freezing weather and joyful faces I decided to waste more time in a small little coffee shop I often visited when I didn’t want to go home. Going back to my apartment right now sounded like torture and hot chocolate sounded godly at the moment.

I pushed open the door feeling the warm air of the store vanquish the cold that followed me inside and despite my runny nose I still managed to smell the inviting scent of coffee lifting my spirits a fraction of an inch.

As usual the small shop had a strangely homey feeling and I was thankful to see that it was sparingly decorated.

I walked towards the counter emitting several soft coughs and sniffles along the way.

“Sup Keira!” One of the teenage workers greeted as I approached him, seeing him clad in his usual uniform – a black polo and deep blue apron. His short blond hair spiked to perfection. Not one hint of Christmas on him.

“Hey Carter.” I replied a little less enthusiastically then him, grabbing a few stiff napkins from the dispenser beside me to alleviate my runny nose.

“Feeling a bit under the weather?” He asked concerned leaning his elbows on the counter to take a closer look and examine me with his crystal blue eyes.

“Is it that obvious?” I questioned, bringing one of the cheap brown napkins to my nose. I softly blew into it clearing up my nose just enough to breathe again.

“Well your nose is so red it’s practically glowing, Rudolf.” He teased slightly flicking my nose. I smiled at the insult and was glad that he distracted me from my “holiday depression” I guess you could call it.

“Thanks for pointing that out, you jerk.” I said throwing the used napkin filled with my boogers at him.

“Gross! You’re disgusting.” He squealed as he unsuccessfully tried to avoid the blow nearly tripping over his feet in the process.

“Then you better hurry up and get me some hot chocolate before I throw another one at you.” I jokingly threatened.

“As you wish m’lady.” He laughed pushing a piece of dark hair out of my eyes and getting dangerously close to my face.

I shook his fingers off of my cheek and took a step back finding the grimace form on my face once again. That was a downside to Carter. He was a hopeless flirt.

After seeing my annoyed expression Carter gave me a coy wink and a matching smirk before he went off to make my hot chocolate. I rolled my eyes at his gesture and tried to ignore it the best I could. Does this boy love to piss me off or what?

I came here to try and cheer up and have some hot chocolate and instead Carter has to try and make a move on me. For once can he just keep his hands to himself?

The little prick.

Annoyed I turned my back on him and leaned on the counter trying to find anything to consume my time while I waited. My eyes scanned the nearly empty store seeing the poorly unorganized decorations put up probably by Carter and his buddies none the less.

Carter didn't particularly like Christmas either. The only thing he enjoyed was getting a break off of school…and being able to throw a crazy party. He wouldn’t stop talking about it. I was surprised he hadn’t brought it up today.

I wouldn’t be able to stand him right now if all he talked about was what he was going to be planning at his party.

I was still scanning the store when something caught my attention. Right outside the window of the café stood a man. He looked insanely lost from what I could tell.

He was bundled up pretty good too, suggesting that maybe he wasn't used to the cold and just came up here to visit family for the holidays. I didn’t recognize his face so that was a possibility.

I might not be a social butterfly who knew and talked to everyone in town but I have a knack for remembering faces, and I definitely would have remembered his face…

“Here you go love.” Carter whispered in my ear pulling me back to reality. I guess he caught on to my hostile mood because he kept his hands to himself this time, thankfully.

Still dazed from the harsh landing into reality I didn’t say anything as I took the warm cup into my hands and searched my pockets for a few dollars.

“Don’t worry. It’s on me.” Cater said with a dismissive flick of his wrist. I could already smell something suspicious. I narrowed my eyes at him, this wasn’t normal, especially coming from selfish Carter.

“What’s the catch?” I replied eyeing him suspiciously.

“Nothing,” He said raising his hands up defensively. “Can’t a person just do something nice for the holidays?”

He was lying through his teeth.

“Bullshit Carter.” I swore at him causing a little bit of a scene. He tensed up under my glare and he finally spit it out.

“Okay fine you caught me. I just wanted to ask if you would come to my Christmas party with me.” He said with a pleading voice and hopeful eyes. I stared at him incredulously.

This boy just didn’t quit did he.

If he didn’t stop this I’m pretty sure my anger would get the best of me and I would shatter his little heart so bad it would take years for it to mend.

I just had to be calm, because even as mean as I could be, I didn’t want to break the kid’s heart so close to the holidays. Sympathy is such an annoying emotion.

“No.” I spat out venomously without any hesitation or thought as I took a cautious sip of my hot chocolate hoping he would drop the subject.

Sadly he didn’t catch on like he did the last time.

“Aw come on Keira. It’ll be fun.” He tried convincing me. Just picturing going to the party made me shutter. It would definitely not be “fun”.

“Sorry kid, college parties aren’t really my scene.” I said wrinkling my nose in disgust trying to be as firm as I could with him. It was like I was talking to a child.

“It would be better then spending Christmas alone.” He whispered, but even in his soft tone I could hear the empathy in his voice that made my blood boil, for some unknown reason.

“How did you know I was spending Christmas alone?” I spoke through clenched teeth, every word laced with a deadly amount of spite as gripped the edge of the counter.

“Look Keira I’m j-just…I’m just worried about you.” He said sincerely placing his large hand over mine. I could tell that this time he was telling the truth. He really was concerned, but even that sweet gesture didn’t cool down my anger. “No one should spend the holidays alone.”

“Well don’t be! I’m a big girl Carter and I know how to take care of myself.”

With that I turned on my heels and walked out of the store wishing I had never stepped foot in there in the first place.

I pushed the door open with unnecessary force and trudged out into the bitter cold bumping into someone’s shoulder, nearly knocking over the person in the process.

There he was. The guy I had noticed outside of the store.

He looked different up close. His thin rosy lips and hazel eyes were accented by his lightly tanned skin that flushed red because of the cold.

“I-I’m sorry.” He spoke to me with his gloved hand on my shoulder, stuttering not only from the cold but from the icy stare that I was giving him.

His eyes locked onto mine. He looked like a lost puppy with his helpless expression. For a second I wanted to help him, but instead I pushed his hand off my shoulder roughly and stormed passed him.