What's-His-Name
Chapter three
What the fuck?
Why was Ryan blanking me like that, I know I hurt him, but he doesn't just have to ignore me .
Or maybe he truly dint know who I am, maybe had forgotten me. Maybe I was, to him just another stranger in his life
But why?
I decided to phone Spencer, he was Ryan's best friend and he would know what had happened
I dialled his number into my phone , I don’t even know were I’d got I from , Ryan had probably given it you me at some point .
‘Hi Spencer here, who's calling’
I paused I forgotten how much he hated me
‘Umm it Brendon Urie’
‘Arsehole’ he said and put the phone down
Yep he hated my guts
I phoned again
‘Spencer please we need to talk’
‘Piss off Brendon; I’m putting the phone down’
Oh my god he couldn't put the phone down I needed to talk
‘Spencer, I've seen Ryan’
‘Oh, and’
‘He doesn't know who I am ‘
‘I intend it to stay that way’
‘What, why?’
‘He’s forgotten you brendon’
‘What why ’I said again Christ I’m a crap conversationalist
‘There was a crash, he got brain damage and lost his memory ’
‘GOD, when’ oh I’m adding words to my vocabulary
‘About three years ago’
‘WHAT, why didn’t any one tell me’ fuck a crash , god poor Ryan
‘Why should we tell you?’
‘Because I care’ this was so unfair
‘Fuck brendon you don’t care about anyone except yourself’
‘I care more than you!’
There was silence
He finally spoke
‘You think you care about Ryan. Were you the one who tried to convince him that he wasn’t useless, that there would be other guys for him? Were you the one who heard him crying in the night and went to comfort him? Were you the one who got a phone call saying that your best friend had been in a crash? Were you the one who sat at the hospital being told that he might no make it through the night? Were you the one who was so pleases to see him alive that you ran into his room to see him and he didn’t know who you fucking were? You weren't there for him, I was. You don’t care Brendon, you FUCKING BROKE HIM, and now he doesn't even know you exist.’
Then he put the phone down
I didn’t need to call him again, I knew enough and knowing it made me feel much worst that when I just thought Ryan was blanking me.
What the hell was I going to do?
Why was Ryan blanking me like that, I know I hurt him, but he doesn't just have to ignore me .
Or maybe he truly dint know who I am, maybe had forgotten me. Maybe I was, to him just another stranger in his life
But why?
I decided to phone Spencer, he was Ryan's best friend and he would know what had happened
I dialled his number into my phone , I don’t even know were I’d got I from , Ryan had probably given it you me at some point .
‘Hi Spencer here, who's calling’
I paused I forgotten how much he hated me
‘Umm it Brendon Urie’
‘Arsehole’ he said and put the phone down
Yep he hated my guts
I phoned again
‘Spencer please we need to talk’
‘Piss off Brendon; I’m putting the phone down’
Oh my god he couldn't put the phone down I needed to talk
‘Spencer, I've seen Ryan’
‘Oh, and’
‘He doesn't know who I am ‘
‘I intend it to stay that way’
‘What, why?’
‘He’s forgotten you brendon’
‘What why ’I said again Christ I’m a crap conversationalist
‘There was a crash, he got brain damage and lost his memory ’
‘GOD, when’ oh I’m adding words to my vocabulary
‘About three years ago’
‘WHAT, why didn’t any one tell me’ fuck a crash , god poor Ryan
‘Why should we tell you?’
‘Because I care’ this was so unfair
‘Fuck brendon you don’t care about anyone except yourself’
‘I care more than you!’
There was silence
He finally spoke
‘You think you care about Ryan. Were you the one who tried to convince him that he wasn’t useless, that there would be other guys for him? Were you the one who heard him crying in the night and went to comfort him? Were you the one who got a phone call saying that your best friend had been in a crash? Were you the one who sat at the hospital being told that he might no make it through the night? Were you the one who was so pleases to see him alive that you ran into his room to see him and he didn’t know who you fucking were? You weren't there for him, I was. You don’t care Brendon, you FUCKING BROKE HIM, and now he doesn't even know you exist.’
Then he put the phone down
I didn’t need to call him again, I knew enough and knowing it made me feel much worst that when I just thought Ryan was blanking me.
What the hell was I going to do?