Maxim's Adventure Through Life and Death
Unrequited Love
By the time I walked into my house, everything was dark. My parents were up stairs sleeping and I wasn't suppose to be out. I quietly walked upstairs, avoiding every creak. I've lived in this house for my entire life, but only today I noticed how sad it looked in the dark. It seemed to sag with age. There curtains were dark and hid the rest of the room from the streetlights. Everything in the room was older than me. I turned around and went straight to my room, trying not to think of Justin.
My eyes were open, starring up at the blank ceiling above me. I couldn't sleep. Every time my eyes closed I could see Justin. His hand on mine, his lips gently brushing mine. I couldn't stand it. How could he do this to me? I was all alone. No one could understand this.
In my small town, people don't like outsiders. If you have a funny accent, different skin color, or just weird, people wouldn't talk to you. Most of the time those people would move away. I don't blame them I would too. Which is why I can't be my true self around anyone. I'm not your average seventeen year old boy. I also happen to like other boys. Yep, I'm gay. And Justin, the one guy I could turn to has left me. He doesn't even want to speak to me anymore. He was scared. Scared that people will find out. He makes me sick. He still dates girls and I always hear him bragging about how far he's gone. You wouldn't believe how jealous he makes me. He doesn't want to be gay. He's decided that if he has enough sex with enough girls, one of them is bound to turn him straight. I'd laugh in his face. He can't accept himself.
The worst part about being gay is not being able to tell anyone. My parents wouldn't understand. They belong to the local Catholic church and they are what a lot of people call a "bible thumper". They follow the bible down to the last word. Meaning, that gays shouldn't exist. And as for my brother, Zach, well he makes fun of gays on a daily basis. Calling kids he doesn't like fags, and homos. He uses the word with such disgust, it makes me cringe. My friends are all guys. They definitely wouldn't understand. They would all probably think I would want to get in their pants. So what do you do when you have no one to turn to? I couldn't help but begin to play with the idea of suicide. Maybe I would be better off dead. Sure people would miss me, but they never even knew the real me to begin with.
My eyes were open, starring up at the blank ceiling above me. I couldn't sleep. Every time my eyes closed I could see Justin. His hand on mine, his lips gently brushing mine. I couldn't stand it. How could he do this to me? I was all alone. No one could understand this.
In my small town, people don't like outsiders. If you have a funny accent, different skin color, or just weird, people wouldn't talk to you. Most of the time those people would move away. I don't blame them I would too. Which is why I can't be my true self around anyone. I'm not your average seventeen year old boy. I also happen to like other boys. Yep, I'm gay. And Justin, the one guy I could turn to has left me. He doesn't even want to speak to me anymore. He was scared. Scared that people will find out. He makes me sick. He still dates girls and I always hear him bragging about how far he's gone. You wouldn't believe how jealous he makes me. He doesn't want to be gay. He's decided that if he has enough sex with enough girls, one of them is bound to turn him straight. I'd laugh in his face. He can't accept himself.
The worst part about being gay is not being able to tell anyone. My parents wouldn't understand. They belong to the local Catholic church and they are what a lot of people call a "bible thumper". They follow the bible down to the last word. Meaning, that gays shouldn't exist. And as for my brother, Zach, well he makes fun of gays on a daily basis. Calling kids he doesn't like fags, and homos. He uses the word with such disgust, it makes me cringe. My friends are all guys. They definitely wouldn't understand. They would all probably think I would want to get in their pants. So what do you do when you have no one to turn to? I couldn't help but begin to play with the idea of suicide. Maybe I would be better off dead. Sure people would miss me, but they never even knew the real me to begin with.
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Just a filler mostly.Enjoy. :]