Let The Barriers Go

"You come to me with scars on your wrist,"

Ugh, his voice is amazing. I'm like jealous.

"You tell me this will be the last night feeling
like this.."

oh, shit. It's my turn.

"I just came to say goodbye, I didn't want you to see me cry, I'm fine. But I know it's a lie.."

I love that song, it's so emo, which is why he also loved that song.
We were in music. Our favourite class. Rye and I would always own in this class! We had others together, but this was like our forte, this was our safe house. We could always fall back on music if we failed in another area. Our music room was pretty big, so there was alot of room for us to take up. Just joking, but seriously though, most of the people in our class tended to watch and not actually do anything musical. Though they all had the capabilities, they chose not to. Tye would just sit there and play his air drums though, and Rob would occassionally jump on the electric, but they were the only ones game enough to join in. So music class was ours.

The bell rang, and I picked up my bag and walked out. After walking a metre out of the classroom, I felt the warmth of this soft, smooth hand, intertwine with mine, and I got this, spine-tingling feeling. He had such power over me, and he didn't even know it. Or did he? If he did, he didn't know how to use it very well.

It's been about a month, since that night. The whole sharing night. And I have no idea why I was so worried about opening up to him. What was my mother on about? Males aren't horrible creatures, they are actually very nice. Well this one is anyway. That night, was soo good, on so many different levels.
Wait, let's just have a little recap of that night.

After jumping into the car and getting back to my house, copping an earful from Aunt Karol for my lateness, I headed up to my bedroom. About 15minutes after switching my lamplight off, I heard my window shimmy open. And I was absolutely shitting myself. I was so scared.
"Psst." I heard someone make a noise. I went to open the window, and there he was.Scaling my house. "What are you doing?!" I giggled.
"I wanted to make sure you..uhh.." He paused. "If your ears were okay? You said she gave you an earful, I figure it must of hurt." He winked and then laughed and I playfully slapped his head. A gust of chilly wind blew my curtains leaving the pile of paperwork on my desk, in untidy piles. He was wearing his usual Drop Dead Band Tee, skinny jeans, converse chucks and that was it! It was like freezing! I dragged him in through the window.
"Get your ass in here, Rye!" I whispered.
He fell on the floor with a soft thud and got up, dusting his shirt.
I jumped, flicked the lamplight off, yet again, and closed my eyes. I heard his shoes drop to the floor in a flash. Then I felt his presence next to me, he put his arm around me, and I covered him with the blanket. I fell asleep in his arms again. Happy this time. I loved knowing that he was next to me, keeping me safe. I loved every minute of it.

Ever since that night, life has been so much better. I don't know how, I just feel happier. I feel alive. Like I don't have to be a bitch to everyone! Like I can just be me. I don't need to put this barrier up. I can just let everything go, because for the time I am with him, he's all that matter's. And the weird thing is, we're not even fucking going out! He hasn't asked me out..and I'm freaking out about that. I don't know why he wouldn't ask me out. He tells me he loves me, and I mean, I haven't told him that I love him yet, it's not that simple. But I'm getting there. I am falling. It's obvious. Hard and fast.

We sat at the table with Shelle and Tye. Her and Tye had been together for 3 weeks now. I was so proud of her. It is unusual that she would stay with someone for more than a day. It's unusal that she would date someone. PERIOD. She really liked him, I could tell. He could make her blush with one simple compliment. "Your hair looks good today." She would go as red as a tomatoe. Very cute. Tye was, he wasn't emo looking, he was more, surfie/skatie. He was a cool dude though. Very different to most. Straight, black fringe, skinny jeans, chucks. Meh, he sounds emo enough doesn't he? He was the quiet drummer boy, the one I mentioned in music. I mean, he's quiet, but loud when he wants to be and when he's comfortable. When they sat with us, he didn't usually talk much. Not with us, he would chat away to Shelle and she would love it.

The day went by pretty fast, and as Rye and I walked towards his car, again, hand-in-hand, I realized I had forgotten my notebook. I told Rye I would be back in about 5 minutes so he didn't have to come back with me. I walked back into school and passed the office where Alex was. I stopped dead in my tracks. And watched him curiously. This wasn't Alex, it couldn't of been Alex because Alex, well, Alex left..But if..If it's not Alex, and it's someone that LOOK exactly like Alex..WHAT?! NOOO! He can not be back. No. NO NO NO.