Beast and The Harlot
Chapter 29
I woke up early, the clock reading 5:07.
The skies weren't even bright, and the curtains were aside, revealing the blackness.
"Damn this day," I cursed in a whisper, turning on my side, my back to Jimmy.
"You awake too?" Jimmy's hands were on my back.
"Yeah..." I shut my eyes, fatigue wearing in my bones, but my body unwilling to shut down.
"I'm kinda nervous.." he said, his lips touching my collar bone.
"Me too," I took his hand, rubbing my face with it.
"I'm sure it'll be fine though. What can go wrong?" Jimmy's warm body left mine as he got up.
A lot, I thought sadly.
I rose and dressed conservatively, a pair of dark blue jean shorts, and a black Avenged Sevenfold shirt.
Jimmy pulled on a pair of jeans that I loved for him to wear; they were tight, black leather pants.
Buttoning his black shirt, he smiled at me.
"Don't worry, baby," Jimmy took me in his arms, and covered my entire face with kisses, tender as if it was just rain drops.
I shut my eyes.
"Now, smile. It won't be that bad," Jimmy took my hand, forever the optimistic one.
"What would I do without you?" I let him pull me into his chest; I basked in his masculine aroma.
"Be miserable for the rest of your life, then die," Jimmy giggled into my hair.
"Oh, well thanks...That was very lovely of you to say," I tilted my head back to glower playfully into his eyes.
"Nah. The only lovely thing is you," he kissed me sensitively, kissing me like I was breakable.
"You're cheesy," I grinned.
"But you like me," he pouted, pushing his glasses up on his nose.
"Of course..You're my cheese meister!" I laughed.
Jimmy always knew how to fix me when I was almost cracked and tattered.
***
"Okay. Today's the big day," Dr. Martin said excitedly, holding a large manila folder.
I was sweating buckets, and I was trying to keep myself from hyperventilating.
"We're ready," Syn gave a smile, crossing his muscled arms over his chest.
Jimmy held my hand, since I was sitting on the patient's table.
"This is a very big moment. I want to be certain no fights will occur here when the results are read," Dr. Martin sternly aimed towards the guys.
"We promise," Zacky answered for them.
Oh God...God, what if...What if it's not Jimmy's?
What if it's someone elses? He'll be crushed...
Please, please, please..God, I know I haven't been perfect, but please, let this baby be Jimmy's.. I sent a silent prayer upward.
"Okay. Well, would you like me to read them?" his weathered, old eyes kindly turned to me, "Or would you rather see them?"
"I..I'll look at them.." I decided, every organ in my body ready to jump out of my skin.
"It's okay, baby. Remember, even if it's not mine, I will love you," Jimmy murmured in my ear, "I will always love you."
His words were reassuring, but I was on the line from petrified to being close to shitting on myself.
The folder material was crinkly, and my fingers were so sweaty, they left slight imprints.
Hands shaking, I began to undo the top of the envelope.
The packet slipped from my fingers and hit the floor.
"Cait, do you want someone to open it for you?" Matt's face was concerned.
"N-no. I can do it," I took the papers back from Jimmy, and returned to opening it.
My fingers felt useless, and I just couldn't seem to get them to move.
Finally, I just stopped.
"I can't do this. I...I don't wanna know yet....Please...Don't get mad at me..." I swung my eyes to the floor, not being able to meet any of their stares.
"What? Cait.." Johnny's tone was vanquished, like I'd crushed every dream he had.
"It's her choice, Johnny..We can't force her to look," Jimmy shielded Johnny's egotistic remark from me.
"He's right. The results will always be here for her to look at. I can't make her do anything," Dr. Martin held his hands up, as if in surrender.
Syn, Matt, Johnny and Zacky seemed like they were ready to go.
"I'm sorry..." I put my head in my hands.
"Don't beat yourself up, babe. One of these days, you'll be ready," Jimmy took my chin in his hands, and then kissed me.
"We're gonna go," Johnny mumbled, and they all exited Dr. Martin's office.
The room seemed cavernous, like an orange carved half way out, the rest of the orange slushed out, which was exactly how I felt.
The skies weren't even bright, and the curtains were aside, revealing the blackness.
"Damn this day," I cursed in a whisper, turning on my side, my back to Jimmy.
"You awake too?" Jimmy's hands were on my back.
"Yeah..." I shut my eyes, fatigue wearing in my bones, but my body unwilling to shut down.
"I'm kinda nervous.." he said, his lips touching my collar bone.
"Me too," I took his hand, rubbing my face with it.
"I'm sure it'll be fine though. What can go wrong?" Jimmy's warm body left mine as he got up.
A lot, I thought sadly.
I rose and dressed conservatively, a pair of dark blue jean shorts, and a black Avenged Sevenfold shirt.
Jimmy pulled on a pair of jeans that I loved for him to wear; they were tight, black leather pants.
Buttoning his black shirt, he smiled at me.
"Don't worry, baby," Jimmy took me in his arms, and covered my entire face with kisses, tender as if it was just rain drops.
I shut my eyes.
"Now, smile. It won't be that bad," Jimmy took my hand, forever the optimistic one.
"What would I do without you?" I let him pull me into his chest; I basked in his masculine aroma.
"Be miserable for the rest of your life, then die," Jimmy giggled into my hair.
"Oh, well thanks...That was very lovely of you to say," I tilted my head back to glower playfully into his eyes.
"Nah. The only lovely thing is you," he kissed me sensitively, kissing me like I was breakable.
"You're cheesy," I grinned.
"But you like me," he pouted, pushing his glasses up on his nose.
"Of course..You're my cheese meister!" I laughed.
Jimmy always knew how to fix me when I was almost cracked and tattered.
***
"Okay. Today's the big day," Dr. Martin said excitedly, holding a large manila folder.
I was sweating buckets, and I was trying to keep myself from hyperventilating.
"We're ready," Syn gave a smile, crossing his muscled arms over his chest.
Jimmy held my hand, since I was sitting on the patient's table.
"This is a very big moment. I want to be certain no fights will occur here when the results are read," Dr. Martin sternly aimed towards the guys.
"We promise," Zacky answered for them.
Oh God...God, what if...What if it's not Jimmy's?
What if it's someone elses? He'll be crushed...
Please, please, please..God, I know I haven't been perfect, but please, let this baby be Jimmy's.. I sent a silent prayer upward.
"Okay. Well, would you like me to read them?" his weathered, old eyes kindly turned to me, "Or would you rather see them?"
"I..I'll look at them.." I decided, every organ in my body ready to jump out of my skin.
"It's okay, baby. Remember, even if it's not mine, I will love you," Jimmy murmured in my ear, "I will always love you."
His words were reassuring, but I was on the line from petrified to being close to shitting on myself.
The folder material was crinkly, and my fingers were so sweaty, they left slight imprints.
Hands shaking, I began to undo the top of the envelope.
The packet slipped from my fingers and hit the floor.
"Cait, do you want someone to open it for you?" Matt's face was concerned.
"N-no. I can do it," I took the papers back from Jimmy, and returned to opening it.
My fingers felt useless, and I just couldn't seem to get them to move.
Finally, I just stopped.
"I can't do this. I...I don't wanna know yet....Please...Don't get mad at me..." I swung my eyes to the floor, not being able to meet any of their stares.
"What? Cait.." Johnny's tone was vanquished, like I'd crushed every dream he had.
"It's her choice, Johnny..We can't force her to look," Jimmy shielded Johnny's egotistic remark from me.
"He's right. The results will always be here for her to look at. I can't make her do anything," Dr. Martin held his hands up, as if in surrender.
Syn, Matt, Johnny and Zacky seemed like they were ready to go.
"I'm sorry..." I put my head in my hands.
"Don't beat yourself up, babe. One of these days, you'll be ready," Jimmy took my chin in his hands, and then kissed me.
"We're gonna go," Johnny mumbled, and they all exited Dr. Martin's office.
The room seemed cavernous, like an orange carved half way out, the rest of the orange slushed out, which was exactly how I felt.
♠ ♠ ♠
I based this on I Don't Wanna Know (Bliss) by Hinder. They have really awesome songs. Hehe. Thanks for the comments! And reading and subscribing! You guys rock! xD Enjoy the update!