Early Sunsets Over Newark

When we reached Chicago, life slowed down. We stopped at the house of blues, and the boys prepared for their separate sets again. I watched in silence, as Gerard approached me, in full make-up. I could smell it from across the room, but up close, it reminded me of my old bedroom. I liked the smell. I could instantly remember getting ready numerous times with Sammy. Passing along eyeliners and hair spray. Gee sat down next to me real quiet, and didn't say anything for a long time. We just sat together and watched everyone scramble. Tour managers pulled plastic covers off of food, Zacky munched away on oatmeal raisin cookies and bologna sandwiches. Jimmy talked with the drum tech, and Brian chose one of the many schectr guitars tuned and strung up for him. Frank tuned his own instrument in the far corner, while Mikey discovered chili-flavored potato chips. I watched in wonder, slightly disturbed. I had dreamed of this. I had wanted this for years. I felt Gerard's hand rest on my knee, in a comforting way, and then he grabbed my hand, squeezed slightly tight and I looked at him. He studied me, per the usual. He questioned how I was feeling without saying a word. And without making a sound, I started to cry. My eyes welled with tears, and my whole body shook.

I was on tour with my most favorite bands of all time, and yet I wasn't happy. I had just lost my best friend. Gerard pulled me into a tight hug, and I nuzzled my face into his neck as I felt more arms around me. And then, suddenly; I heard the fans go wild. I pulled away from Gerard, only to see most of the boys had been hugging me again, and were now confronted with a rough decision; to leave me by myself and go to their fans or leave their fans and comfort me. I smirked, and pointed to the stage. Frank was the first to follow my instructions, already holding his instrument and the rest took their time to follow.

I wiped my eyes, pulled my hair behind my ear and took some deep breathes. Life was changing, and I should too. I stood up, straightened out my shirt and headed out back for a smoke. The door slammed shut behind me, the only way back in now was a keycard, but that was fine. I lit a cigarette and inhaled slow, sat close to the ground so that all my weight was on my ankles, and I hugged my knees. The cold air was enough to send chills down my spine. Somehow, i didn't mind. Suddenly, I heard my name.

"Terra?" I looked up, fast and quick. My neck suddenly hurt and I jumped to my feet. I turned around and looked for the person who was looking for me. To my unfortunate surprise, it wasn't who I had hoped it would be.

"Destin?!"