Where Will I Be When I Wake up Next to a Stranger

It was only 10 when Katherine stirred, but to her it felt like eternity. She snuggled her pillow close to her, but when she remembered parts of what happened the previous night, she shot up in bed, to make sure it was her own. When she figured that Brian wasn’t there either, she laid her head back down on her own pillow.

She remembered bits and pieces of the night before, but not the whole scenario. But her red flags came up when she thought of Brian. Something wasn’t right, and she knew that for a fact. She sat up and rubbed her temple when she read the red numbers on her digital clock, 10:08. As by some coincidence, Brian opened her door not even two minutes later. She just stared at him as he smiled and closed the door behind him. He made movement toward her as she scooted back, away from him.

“What’s wrong sugar? You remember something you shouldn’t?” He smiled as Katherine nibbled on her inner cheek.

Something was really wrong here.

“What the fuck did you do to me Brian?” She questioned in a soft voice that sounded unlike her confident self.
“It doesn’t matter love. You don’t remember anyways, so therefore, it doesn’t apply to you.” He said as he sat on the side of her bed.
“It’s my fucking body, of course it applies to me!” she whispered angrily.

In an instant, his hand was around her neck, her head smacking her headboard.

“If you tell anyone, and I mean anyone I’ll show you what I’m really capable of. You don’t want your daughter having to go through any of this, do you?” He whispered in her ear, and kissed her hard on the mouth.

She shoved his face away from her, grimacing at him. He just smiled and went his way out her door. Once he left, her eyes stung with tears. Why the fuck couldn’t she remember? What the hell did he do to her? Random questions popped into her head, as her eyes got blurry behind the tears. She crawled into a ball and held her knees in her arms and let the tears fall. What was she going to do? She couldn’t turn to the police, he was the police. As she debated on anything, everything she could, her conclusion was that nothing could help. She had nothing to believe in.

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As she got tired of moping around in her room, she at least cleaned up to crawl downstairs. As she stood at the foot of the stairs, her dad had a worried expression plastered on his face. He enveloped her in a hug as she barely had enough strength to give one back herself.

“What happened to you? Brian brought you home passed out and said he found you in an ally way behind the club?” Her dad questioned her as she didn’t know what to think of this.
“I…I have no idea.” She said quietly as her dad looked at her straight in the eye.

She wasn’t completely lying. What if she really did end up in the ally behind the club? She couldn’t remember for the life of her. But she did know Brian had something behind this. Whatever it was, she was going to remember someway, or somehow.

She smiled weakly at her dad as she walked past him into the kitchen.

“I’m fine. I just needed some sleep, that’s all.” She tried to assure her dad as she grabbed a bowl out of the cupboard, Cap N’ Crunch from on top of the fridge, and milk.
“I don’t want you getting drunk every night Katherine.” He accused as Katherine scoffed from behind her spoon.
“I didn’t even have a drink.” She mumbled as her own dad scoffed just like she had.
“Okay then.” Her dad said as he left without another word.

Katherine grumbled under her breath. She shouldn’t have said anything in the first place. This isn’t his battle anyways, so why should she worry him. All he thinks about is the way her mom ended up jumping off a bridge. It wasn’t as if she never thought about it, but she didn’t dwell on it like her father had over 15 years. As she sat at the dining table, she heard feet padding across the linoleum of her dad’s kitchen.

“Hi mommy.” Amity’s small voice greeted as Katherine smiled as best she could.
“Hello baby.” Katherine said as she picked her up and set her on her lap.
“Mama, can we go to the park today?” Amity questioned her mother as Katherine sadly told her daughter she wasn’t up to it.
“But we haven’t been in a while.” Her daughter tried again as Katherine shook her head.
“We’ll go tomorrow Amity.” Katherine tried to assure her as Amity’s bottom lip quivered.
“Mommy…” Amity trailed off as tears slid down her cheeks.
“Oh Amity.” Katherine tried to quiet her as tears hit her shoulder.
“We can go tomorrow, and we’ll get ice cream, and it’ll just be a mommy and Amity day. Okay?” Katherine tried to bargain with her daughter as she hated seeing this angel face cry.
“Okay.” Amity mumbled quietly as she was still quite upset and laid on Katherine’s shoulder for some time.

As Katherine sat there, waiting for either Amity to move, or for someone to come into the kitchen, she noticed Amity falling asleep in her arms.

“This is how you remind me of what I really am…” Katherine silently sang Nickelback’s How You Remind Me as she silently crept up the stairs to put her beloved daughter to bed.

To be quite honest, she didn’t know what she was doing with her life. Of course, no one wants to be pregnant at 18, at least she didn’t. But that hasn’t stopped her from doing what she has. She was an aspiring dancer though, and there was nothing she wanted more than to go to the prestigious school of Julliard located in New York City. But she wasn’t going to give up on herself now, or her daughter, to follow a dream that may not come true. Her belief that anything as such could happen, was very small. Plus, that little dream couldn’t even come true for a while now, and she has to at least survive one week before she thought ahead of herself here.