To Be Careless Is to Be Reckless

Lexi

I held in my hands the napkin that Destiny had given me with Frank's number on it. My brain was playing tricks on me, telling me to call him, while my heart was begging me not to.

For once, I followed my head.

"Hello?" he answered.

"Frank? It's Alexandra."

"Oh, hey, Lexi. What's up?"

I hated the way he sounded so casual.

"I think we should talk. Is there any way you could come over here?"

"Of course there is, sweets. I can be there in 15. Is that good for you?"

I cringed at the old pet name.

"That's fine. See you soon."

I quickly hung up and shook off the fuzzy clouds that always seemed to surround me when I talked to Frank...

....Stupid pink candy clouds of ridiculousness.

My mind was trying to use logic on me, telling me Frank had been ( and still was) the love of my life, had been my husband, was the father of my children. I couldn't just ignore him forever, could I?

My heart was crying for me, asking why I allowed myself to yearn for a man who had broken my heart time and time again, leaving me in smaller pieces each time.

I always came to the same conclusion: I was still utterly and madly in love with him.

Of course, there had been a few men in my life within the last 10 years. Some had been wonderful gentlemen, others had been real losers.

But when I started getting close to a man, I'd find myself beginning to compare him to -you guessed it- Frank. When they didn't measure up, I'd gently cut them loose. There was no sense in stringing them along if I knew it wasn't a match.

No... Whether Frank knew it or not, he was still very much a part of my now nonexistent life.

It was like I couldn't function during my day without thinking about Frankie and all the 'what ifs' and 'if onlys'.

I think it was because I needed closure on our unfinished business...

And I was about to get just that.