No Chance, No Way

February 1 – 6 p.m.-- Formal Presentation of Princess Emilie

I glanced at the clock. It read 7:30 A.M. Why in the world was I woken up so early?!

In a rush, Sadie led me to a downstairs room where beauty attendants tended to every aspect of my body. When I say every aspect, I mean every aspect. I went through a full-body wax, a mani/pedi, a full-body exfoliation treatment, hair styling, etc. until I actually looked like a princess, born and bred. The only break I got was to eat lunch, which was a fruit bowl coupled with a bottle of water. When the make-up artists were finished with me and took their leave, I turned to face the mirror.

I couldn't even recognize the Yankee in me. I looked like a European in the flesh. Elegant, beautiful, stunning… every graceful quality considered to be European seemed to be epitomized in this new, made over me.

"This is bullshit."

The words left my mouth before I had even registered that I thought them. I looked around the room for anyone to complain to, but all I saw was Jacques the bodyguard stationed by the door.

"Hey Jack, do you mind if I call you Jack? Do I look like I'm from New York? Or do I look like I was born and bred right here in Reyland?"

"You look like a princess."

I grunted and murmured under my breath, "Just because I look like one doesn't mean I am one."

"But you are."

I glared over at the bodyguard and saw that he had a slight smirk on his face. I grinned at the discovery and twirled on the pedestal for him.

"Just call me Princess Prune."

I rolled my eyes and sighed, staring at the reflection in the mirror once more. My hair was less frizzy but retained its natural waves; it framed the angles of my face perfectly. My skin was glowing and the make-up that was applied to my face appeared to enhance my natural features. I wasn't afraid to admit it; I looked beautiful.

"Dress selection time, please follow me Your Highness."

Jacques led me down the hallway, up a flight of stairs, through another corridor, and finally, into a large room with racks of dresses lining the walls. Sadie was standing in front of a panel of mirrors giving instructions to two other women who had measuring tapes draped around their necks. When she saw us walk in, she shooed them away and motioned for Jacques and I to walk toward the center of the room.

"There you are. Gorgeous, if I may say so," she said, looking me up and down. "Give me a spin, will you?"

I indulged her request and span around slowly, smiling at the attention from the housekeeper.

"Brilliant. Alright, take a look at the dresses we've approved and select one for tonight's gala. Over fifty royal families will be in attendance tonight and some families span up to three generations. All of them are here to meet you. Find a dress you think suits your personality and style. When you're done, take it to the closet over there and have the seamstresses measure you and adjust the dress accordingly. It's 2:00 right now and you don't have to be downstairs and ready until 5:15, sound good?"

I nodded, but I wasn't really listening. I was too busy looking around the room at the elegant gowns available to me and at my fingertips.

"Emilie."

The suddenness of Sadie's voice commanded my attention.

"What time do you have to be downstairs?"

"6?"

She smiled. "No, unless you want to walk in after some of the guests. 5:15 sharp. Understood?"

"Right," I said, looking down at my tatty converse. "Sorry."

"That's alright. Jacques, we need to discuss security detail with the Regent and the King."

With that, they left. And I was alone with hundreds of dresses I would have never had the opportunity to even touch back in the Bronx. Window shopping was a thing of the past, I thought to myself as I approached the first rack I saw.

***

Two hours had passed and I had only found one dress that I truly liked and wouldn't mind wearing. It was a strapless royal purple silk gown, with netting draping the bottom of the skirt from the waist down. The scary part was that I had only gotten through just over one half of the room, leaving at least ten more racks to go through.

"This is ridiculous!" I groaned aloud, draping the purple gown over a chair next to the mirrors.

I glared at the side of the room that I hadn't yet combed over for a dress and weighed out the options I had in my head. I could simply ignore that side of the room and just settle on the purple dress. Or, I could very quickly go through the rest of the racks in a set time period. I nodded to myself and glanced at the clock on the wall. It read 4:10.

Ok, Emilie, you have half an hour to find a dress better than the purple one on the chair. Thirty minutes, that's it!

I smiled slightly and ran over to the racks, quickly glancing at a dress and then pushing it aside. I pulled out two dresses after going through five racks, and it was 4:25. Fifteen minutes later, I was just finishing up the penultimate rack when I saw a flow of plum purple fabric peeking out from the beginning of the next one. I rushed over to it and pulled the dress from the rack. It was a strapless gown, dull blue in color with lace detail in the bodice. The skirt flowed out from the waist down; there was a slit in the blue fabric which is where the plum purple had come from. Where the blue fabric gathered up to form a slit, the purple had peeked through in all of its grungy glory. This dress was perfect for me.

I ran over to the closet with the dress in my hands and gave it to the seamstresses. They were obviously annoyed considering they only had 25 minutes to adjust the dress to fit on my body flawlessly. But they didn't need the full time they had allocated to them, considering they were done measuring me and hemming the dress in just fifteen minutes. I was downstairs wearing the gown I had chosen by 5:10 sharp.

"You're early," I heard a voice from behind me say. I turned around to find Jacques wearing a tuxedo and stationed at the bottom of the initial staircases in the foyer of the castle. "You're also not wearing any jewelry or shoes."

Fuck!

My eyes widened and I ran back up the stairs. I stopped at the landing when I realized I had no idea where the jewelry cabinet was for me. I glanced back down at Jacques and was about to ask him where to go when he read my mind and said, "Your closet, Emilie."

I nodded and continued running in that direction. I ran into my room, into my closet, and quickly spun around. Ignoring the multitude of clothes hanging up, I began to open up drawers until I found one containing earrings and bangles. I unlocked my sidekick to check the time and saw that it was 5:14.
FUCK. This is all I have time for, I guess. I found a pair of chandelier earrings that were a similar shade to the blue on my dress and a set of plain black bangles. I shoved them in my ears and on my hand and turned to the end of the closet where shelves of shoes greeted me. I grabbed a pair of silver ones and ran back downstairs.

Does this count as my workout of the month?

By the time I reached the foyer again, it was 5:20. Jacques was still at his station and raised an eyebrow at me when he saw me lean against the staircase rail to catch my breath.

"Oh, give me a break! I had five minutes to accessorize!"

He merely shook his head and smirked slightly.

I narrowed my eyes at him and stuck out my tongue. Looking around I saw that Sadie wasn't in the immediate vicinity so I took that as my opportunity to slip on the silver heels. I plopped down on the marble steps, careful not to mess up my dress in any way, and put on my shoes. Then, I waited. I waited for what seemed like forever with my face resting in my left palm and my right arm laying across my lap. Sometime in between thinking about all the people I would meet and whether or not I would make a good impression, a blinding flash of light pulled me out of my thoughts. I glanced over and saw a man with a large camera pointing his DSLR straight at my face.

"Can I help you?" I asked, standing up and walking down the remaining steps. I looked past him and into the room he came from and noticed Sadie talking to a few people. Another flash went off.

"What the- Stop with the candids already! Who are you?"

"Henrik, resident photographer." Flash. "Smile, please."

I flashed an exaggerated smile. Oh, boy… tonight is going to be a long night.