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Just Stay With Me Awhile

Cheater, Cheater

“Hey.” Zack smiled at Lili after the show, his forehead dampened in sweat as he pulled her in for a quick hug. She hugged him back like she knew she should, but somehow, she didn’t feel the same joy when his arms wrapped around him as she wanted to. There were no proverbial fireworks going off; no heartbeat pounding against her chest whenever he was near. No, with Zack, her relationship seemed to have fallen into a comfortable, if not dreary at times, lull.

“Hi.” She replied back to him, smiling even though she didn’t feel it. She leaned up and pecked him lightly on his lips, wrapping her arms around his neck. She felt his snakebites against her skin, his mouth set in a smirk at her rare moment of PDA.

“What’s this for?” He asked her quietly in her ear, pulling away to meet her gaze. She met his eyes with her own but found that she couldn’t keep her eyes on him for long without feeling guilty. She knew she should tell him that she was no longer as sure as she should be, but she couldn’t hurt him like that. Even though they’d had a rollercoaster of a relationship, she realized now that Zack had never really done anything to hurt her. By telling him what she was feeling, she knew she’d be doing exactly that.

“Just to show you how much I missed you.” She lied, pecking his lips again before pulling away and grabbing his hand in her smaller one. “Are you hungry?”

“Yeah.” He grinned. “Let me go clean up and then we can go out to dinner, yeah?”

She nodded and watched him walk away, a small frown on her face as she thought over what her Uncle Nikki had told her.

If you don’t know the answer, then maybe you haven’t made the right decision.

Was he right? By choosing Zacky over Brian, had Lili compromised her own happiness and made the wrong decision? She just didn’t know anymore, and she felt horrible about it. If she continued doing this to Zacky, bad things would be the ultimate end result, and it could be disastrous for everyone. But if she told him, worse things could happen, as well. Since when had life gotten so complicated for her, she thought to herself.

She was pulled from her thoughts when she saw Brian walking in front of her, and she knew she needed to at least say something to him. He still had the dead look on his face, and it killed her to know that it was her own fault.

“Hey, Brian.” She called softly, causing him to stop in his tracks and look over his shoulder to see her standing there. He gave her a small, confused smile, though she thought she saw just a hint of happiness find its way into his dark chocolate eyes when she spoke to him.

“Hey.” He replied, his voice hoarse and quiet. Lili frowned, wondering if he’d cried earlier. She didn’t want to know the answer to that question, she thought to herself. If she made him cry, she’d never forgive herself.

“You were amazing tonight, like you always are.” She smiled encouragingly, breaking what promised to be an awkward silence between them. “You never cease to amaze me, Brian Haner.”

And just like that, the happiness left his eyes and he nodded curtly before turning around. “Yeah, I guess. See you later, Lil.” He told her as he walked away from her, his back facing her instead of his eyes. She cursed under her breath when he turned to leave, and she ran over to him, touching his arm lightly.

“I’m…I’m sorry, Brian.” She told him. “I never meant to pull you into the middle of everything.”

“We talked about this earlier.” He said quietly, not meeting her gaze. “I told you I was fine.”

“But you’re not.” She told him earnestly, pulling his shoulders so that he had no choice but to look at her. “You’re not fine, Brian, and it’s starting to worry me.”

“Why?” He asked her, the word devoid of emotion. “Why are you worried about me? I’m not your boyfriend; Zacky is. Worry about him.”

He turned to leave again, but Lili didn’t let him. “Dammit, Brian! Will you listen to yourself? What happened to you?” She asked him quietly, looking up at him.

A bitter laugh left Brian’s lips as he looked down at her. “You really want the answer to that question, or are you only asking because you want to seem like you care?”

“I do care, Brian.” She whispered before realizing that she and Brian were standing where no one could see them. That thought made her slightly nervous, but she didn’t think Brian would do anything to her.

You happened.” He replied, the words short and emotional. “And I should have fuckin’ realized it, because then I never would have let myself start falling—never mind. Go back to your boyfriend, Lili. Before I do something we’ll both regret.”

Brian didn’t have time to respond as Lili crashed her lips against his as she stood on her tiptoes, grabbing her shoulders in his hand and meshing her body against his. He gasped in surprise at her actions; however, he didn’t stop the kiss as he pulled her even tighter against him, pushing her up against the wall and leaning down to deepen the kiss.

A few minutes later, he breathlessly pulled away from her before glaring at her, anger flashing in his deep brown orbs. “Consider that a goodbye kiss, Lili. Because it’s never going to happen again.”

Lili watched as he walked away, and this time she made no effort to stop him from leaving as tears formed in the corners of her eyes. She realized that she had just done the very thing she’d dumped Zack for in the very beginning.

She’d cheated.