Uneasy Hearts Weigh The Most

My current predicament was trying to explain to Deon exactly what about Grayson bothered me, but it was difficult to tell him what it was when I didn’t even know it myself. The fact that we were discussing this in the back of our US history class while our teacher, Mrs. Hunter, gave a lecture didn’t exactly help matters.

“But I don’t understand, man, what exactly about him bothers you?” Deon asked.

“I’m telling you, I can’t explain it, it’s just the way he carries himself or something, maybe how he talks, I don’t know,” I explained in a rushed whisper. It was the last class of the day, and I couldn’t wait to escape room 212 to leave and walk home peacefully with Aubergine. And explain to Deon without having to whisper what my beef with Grayson is. Maybe Derrick would understand? I made a mental note to call him later and discuss the issue with him.

“That’s ridiculous Zac, how could you not know why you don’t like him? You’re just being prejudiced or something against him. I thought he seemed pretty nice.”

“You think everyone is nice!” I hissed.

The two of us are actually pretty tight, but I was taking my anger developed from not understanding why I was upset on him, and that wasn’t fair. I don’t apologize well, however, but I was saved by Mrs. Hunter handing out sheets of paper to everyone and stopping at our table for a brief moment before saying, “Gentlemen, if you think I can’t see you talking, you are sadly mistaken. The next time I catch you talking you won’t be so lucky, but will receive more than a warning. Is that clear?”

We both nodded yes, and I know that I kept a gigantic grin from spreading across my face until she turned her back to us. I looked at Deon and his face looked exactly how I imagined mine to look – ready to burst at the seams from laughter. Mrs. Hunter isn’t exactly threatening when she wants to be, so her “promise” was really just an empty threat.

Finally, after twenty more minutes of learning about the trade routes of the early United States (bleck), the bell finally rang, setting us off into freedom until we had to return at eight the next morning, seventeen hours later.

I met Aubergine at our usual spot, in front of her locker, only to find that she had an [s[unwanted guest alongside of her. When we walked home, it was a time for the two of us to unwind and discuss our day. It sounds cheesy, I know. The only bad time was if we hit rare rough patch and had to walk home together – although, most of the time, I didn’t bother fetching her, nor did she bother waiting up for me. Of course, this doesn’t happen frequently.

Aubergine was digging through her locker for something, while Grayson was leaning on the locker to her left, acting nonchalant and cool like he probably thought he was. I approached slowly from the opposite end of the hallway, and Grayson was the first one to see me. I didn’t dare acknowledge myself before they saw me for fear that I might rip Grayson’s fucking throat out.

He waved lightly and somehow I managed a forced smile back. I was approaching even closer now, and she saw me too. She stood up from her kneeling position on the ground and grinned – I felt my insides melt. This time I delivered a genuine smile back.

“Grayson is walking home with us,” she said once I was on her other side, leaning on the locker very much like my current nemesis.

On the inside, I raged with fire and bile rose up to my throat. On the ouside, I managed to keep a cool composure and manage an approving “Alright.”

She must have been able to tell I wasn’t exactly thrilled about it, because she said “Because if he doesn’t, his mom can’t get him until five and he doesn’t really know where he’s going.”

“How could he not –“ I began, then decided against asking out loud how he couldn’t know his way home from one of the most commonly used buildings in town. “Okay.”

“Are we ready then?” she asked with a chipper smile. Damn her. He’s going to start liking her soon if she doesn’t stop being so peppy and cute all the time. And Lord knows that would be terrible.

“Yes, yes, let’s just go before it gets dark?” I muttered, which received a dirty glance from her – obviously it wasn’t going to get dark any time super soon. She just wanted me out of the bad mood so I could be nice to Grayson.Bitch Please.

And so we set off to the west side of town, where all the houses are old but homey, and there aren’t any Asians in sight. Not that I’m racist or anything, that’s just how it is. Besides, people of a certain ethnicity tend to live in close communities. It’s just the way it works, and nor anyone else has any control over it.

I let the two of them lead the way, even though I obviously knew where I was going. I figured if I stood too close to him I probably increased my chances of ripping his fingernails out one by one. So I decided to keep my distance.

I did listen to their conversation though. Auberigne asked what classes he was taking. He responded with an excited US history (my least favorite, as you learned before), English III (which made me feel good, I take an advanced placement English class), Chemistry, Honors Algebra II, Spanish III, and some kind of art class I had never even heard of before that was a combination of drawing, painting, and architecture. Usually I thought they just made a separate one for each of those? After hearing about his class I wasn’t so sure.

We reached Aubergine’s house first. All three of us stopped where the sidewalk became perpendicular to the walkway leading up to her house.

“Do you guys want to come in?” she asked politely.

“I would love to, but my parents are expecting me home to help them do more unpacking.” Grayson replied.

“Oh, okay then,” she said, sounding a little disappointed.

“How about you, Zac?” she turned to face me.

“Oh, I have to do homework.” I replied automatically, even though my thoughts completely disagreed with what actually said.

“Okay,” she frowned. “I guess I’ll see you two tomorrow then?”

We both agreed, to which she nodded in reply before turning her back to us and walking up to her house.

Grayson and I turned to face each other.

“Do you turn over here, or keep going up the street?”

“Hmm…” he squinted his eyes trying to remember. I certainly hoped he had to turn here, because I was not looking forward to walking another few blocks with him.

“I turn at the next street.” Phew; only one block.

“Okay.”

And so we set off again, this time with no Aubergine to lead the way and prevent me if I tried to rip his fingernails out. Now I had to have more self control. Is it really even possible to rip someone’s fingernails off though? I had never heard of it happening, but if it was in fact possible, it would certainly be painful.

“Can I have your number?” he asked spontaneously when we were about a third of the way down the block. “Since you live close and everything, just in case I have to ask you something.”

“Oh, yeah, sure,” I replied, thrown off guard.

He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and dutifully entered my number into his contacts list. I certainly hoped it would be the first and last time he ever had to see that number.

“How long have you known Aubergine?” he asked, slipping his phone back into his back pocket.

“Oh gosh, about twelve years now, I guess. We’ve both lived here our entire lives and would get off at the same bus stop since kindergarten.”

“That’s pretty neat,” he responded. “You two seem really close.”

“Best friends,” I replied, perhaps a little harshly.

“Oh, wow.”

“Yeah.” I honestly did not know what else to say. I guess it was a good thing, then, that we were at the street corner where he had to turn.

“Alright, I guess I’ll see you later,” he said, adjusting his bag where it was slung over his right shoulder.

“Bye, dude,” I said, and kept walking toward my final destination where I could spend the rest of the night carefully plotting how I would get Grayson to avoid liking Aubergine. A few plans formed immediately in my mind: 1. Introduce him to a hot girl at school that would capture his attention; 2. Tell him she’s gay (except that would embarrass her and is totally untrue), 3. Ask her out before he had a chance too. Option three was probably the most practical, since it would keep him away and make her mine, but I’m too much of a chickenshit to ask her out. Plus, it’s only been a few days since I’ve taken a serious interest. I’m not a player who just asks a girl out because he thinks she’s hot, even though it probably makes life a lot easier.