An Arrow to My Chest

I trip. And fall. But not hard. I fall on something soft and when I look down, it’s white. And fluffy. Very white and fluffy. I think you get that it’s white and fluffy, right? Well, it’s white and fluffy.

I stand and look around. Guess what the rest of the place looks like!

But there is one exception. A huge golden gate. And behind it? Guess what there’s more of!

I’m about to walk over to this big gate, when I hear a thump behind me. A soft thump.

I turn around, and I can’t believe I see something black in the middle of all of this white and fluffy…stuff!

“Gerard!” I yell, but my voice sounds like nothing but a whisper. I guess it’s being absorbed by the surroundings.

Gerard looks up and practically jumps up and runs towards me. He crashes into my awaiting arms and hugs me tighter than he’s ever had. I hug back.

When we pull away from each other, Gerard looks me deep in the eye.

“I thought I’d never see you again.” His voice is nothing but a whisper, but I can clearly hear it shake. No tears are escaping his eyes, though.

“What happened?” I know the bartender left us, but where are we? And why?

And why the fuck is everything white and fluffy?!

“You died. The bartender killed you.” Gerard sniffles, though there is nothing to sniffle away. There aren’t even any tears to wipe away.

“I had to leave your body to run back to tell Ray Scarlett and Little Bob. But after that, I couldn’t live without you anymore.” I place a finger on his lips to stop him from saying anymore. He doesn’t need to say anymore. I know what he’d done.

Gerard kisses my finger. Then pulls away.

“I didn’t have a chance to say that I love you before you died.” He’s smiling. I smile back.

“I love you too.” We lean into each other arms and let our lips meet. I feel like it’s been forever since our lips have met. I kiss him deep and lovingly, and soon neither of us can resist the need to part our lips and let our tongues meet. They glide over each other, and we move closer – if possible – to let our bodies be in more contact.

Someone clears their throat.

We softly and slowly pull apart – pecking each other until we’re fully ready to look away from each other and to whoever cleared their throat. We’ve still got our arms around one another.

A few feet away from us – in front of the gate – stands a guy in a white toga. He looks old and kind, and his semi-long, white beard is making him resemble Santa. Yes, Santa! We had Santa! And gifts! And Christmas! Of course we had Christmas… Sorry… No hard feelings?

“You must be Frank, also known as Robin Hood,” he says proud, as he smiles widely and looks straight at me.

“Yes, I am.” He pulls out a clipboard and puts on a pair of tiny glasses – both seemingly appearing out of nowhere – and frowns down at the list on the clipboard.

“There must have been a mistake. I only have one Frank/ Robin Hood on my list,” he says, before he looks up at Gerard with a questioning look. Gerard looks down at me, then back up at this old guy.

“Well, we’re sort of a package deal,” he answers with a gorgeous smile on his gorgeous lips. I space out for a second, before I pull myself back to whichever world we’re in.

“Oh, well. How nice. I must say that you’re very welcome. We don’t expect much of a rush for the next few centuries or so. But by the year 1990 and on, we might experience a problem with housing us all. But by then we hope to have expanded our property.” Wow. The world will actually exist in 400 years? Huh… Who knew?

Oh, right. I guess you do. Sorry… Forgot about you. Well, this is my story, so! Back to my story!

“Anyways. Welcome to the both of you. My name is Socrates, the founder and creator of this glorious place.” I look up at Gerard and smirk. I’ve never heard of this old dude, and by the look on Gerard’s face I presume he hasn’t either.

“Please follow me.” Socrates turns around and walks over to the big gate. We follow him – an arm around each other.

“I just need to get your signatures, before we enter.” We both just shrug. I take the pen first and scribble down my name. I pass the pen on to Gerard, who lets go of me and takes the pen. I miss our contact, so as he’s writing his name I wrap both my arms around his stomach and softly kiss the back of his neck. I have to tip-toe to reach it, but I manage.

After he’s signed, he turns around in my embrace and leans down to kiss me.

But once again, we’re interrupted by Socrates clearing his throat. Does he have an infection or something? Or cold, maybe?

We part and return to just having one arm around each other.

“Now, if you would please follow me, I will show you my humble creation.” He turns around and walks towards the gate, and just as he’s about to walk right into it, it slowly starts opening. We follow.

When we’re through the gate, a whole new world suddenly appears.

The white and fluffy shit around us turns a light shade of pink, but it could still be identified as white. To our sides are tons of small buildings that look somewhat like the buildings in town. You know, those buildings made of wooden beams and bricks and various rocks. Straight ahead, a long pebbled road leads towards a huge rainbow, which stretches from one side of the white/pink and fluffy shit to the other.

“Welcome to the 8th heaven!” Socrates looks proud as he stretches his arms out to show us his work. Oh, heaven… Of course.

“Or as we like to call it; The Double Glory. Please, do mind the holes.” Socrates steps over a series of small holes – careful not to slip into one of them. We follow, and as I look down, I think I see some sort of stick. I brush it off though.

“Well, let me give you the grand tour of this place! If you look to your right then we have The Rainbow Room. And straight ahead is the actual rainbow. And yes, there are pots at the end, but they’re not filled with gold. No, they’re filled with lube! And, oh, how many varieties! Strawberry, plum, gravy… any flavor, color and look you want. I prefer the beer-flavored one, but the boa one is quite popular at the moment.” I smile widely up at Gerard. Oh yeah! Boa’ll look good on him!

“Oh, look! Jeanne d’Arc. Or Joan of Arc. She doesn’t really care,” Socrates says in a slightly hush voice.

“Hey Joanie!” he yells and waves at her, and she smiles back kindly. We keep walking along the road.

“She’s really quite nice. A bit aggressive at times, but she’s got a good heart.” Socrates trails off a bit and waves a hand around in the air. Then he stops and points to his left.

“Over here we have The Holy Corner. Mainly catholic priests hang out there. They’re not very talkative, but they do like it up here.” Socrates keeps walking. We follow – still holding each other, as if we’re afraid that the other will fly off. After all, it is heaven…

“Oh, here we are!” Socrates exclaims and holds an arm outstretched towards a small hut.

“This is your suite. Or bungalow… It changes to whatever you’d like it to be. Just follow the instructions in this pamphlet, and do call if you need anything.” Out of nowhere, Socrates pulls out a pamphlet and hands it to me. I take it and look down at it. ‘A guide to Gay Heaven’. How convenient.

“There will be a permanent messenger outside your door. Please enjoy your stay.” And with that, he leaves. I look up and see him, then look to the door to our suite, and then back to where he used to be. He sure knows how to make a grand exit.

I look up at Gerard and smile. He smiles back – his small teeth and gorgeous, deep, brown eyes glisten. My knees go soft.

He turns to me and wraps both his arms around my waist. He looks down at me.

“So, my Robin Hood. Are you ready to see our suite?” He has a hard time saying the word ‘suite’, and wound up lisping. Wow, we really are gay, huh?

I smile up at him, before I tip-toe up and peck his lips.

“I sure am, my rich guy.” He smirks down at me and leans down to peck my lips, before we untangle. I open the door, but before I’m able to step in, I lose my footing.

Gerard’s picked me up – bridal-style. I giggle at him, before I wrap my arms around his neck and bury my nose in the soft skin of his neck. I suck in a deep breath through my nose – smelling his sweet, sweet scent – before I look up and meet his eyes. He kisses me long and wet.

He then pulls away and walks through the door – carrying me into our new home.

The first room we enter has a huge bed in it. All the walls are white/pink, but at least they’re not fluffy. There isn’t much in the room. An ugly dresser – pink. A small bedside table – pink. Curtains in front of a huge window – pink.

I bury myself in Gerard’s neck once again, but soon Gerard lets go of my body. I land on the bed – jumping up and down as the springs break my fall.

I look up at Gerard and see a playful smile on his face. His gorgeous, deep, brown and perfect eyes are glowing.

I reach my arms up to him – making grabbing hands. He giggles sweetly, before he lies down next to me. I wrap my arms around his neck, as his snake around my waist.

And so we lay there – just the two of us. We stare into each other’s eyes – getting lost in the love and adoration we have for one another.

Slowly, the walls around us start disintegrating – turning into tall trees with pale-green leaves on them. At our feet, a stream starts to run and the sheets beneath us turn into the softest and greenest grass you can imagine – with a white spot on it over behind a tree, of course. The sun starts shining through the ceiling, as it slowly disappears from above us. The sound of birds and woodpeckers and squirrels begins to fill the silence, and the soft sound of water splashing against water becomes louder. The smell of grass, oaks, spruce, birch, beech, flowers and fresh air fill our noses.

We gaze into each other’s eyes for as long as we can, but when the sweet sound of children laughing in the distance enters our ears, we can no longer resist the urge to look around. As we do, we smile. Everything is just right. It’s all their – our perfect little sanctuary by the stream.

We both look up at the same time. And there – up, up in a tall, tall tree – we both see the most important detail.

Two pairs of boxers – black short-Gerards and white short-Franks – hanging on that same, strong oak-branch.