Show Me Love

When Clarissa had left Alexandra's apartment that day Alexandra thought about a lot of things. She was worried about the choices she might make, what if she wasn't a lesbian or even bisexual? She would practically disappoint the whole gay community in proving that Chelsea can actually love. Then again, why should she care? This was a matter between her and Chelsea.

Her and Chelsea. No one else was apart of this confusing mess she had gotten herself into. Alexandra looked at fridge. Inside, deep inside was an old bottle of wine that she was in desperate need of. Every time she thought of something to say, scenarios that she would make up in her head in confronting Chelsea with her feelings, each and every time she thought about it, she would have yet another glass of wine until the entire bottle was gone. There was nothing left but the drunken girl that was standing there thinking about what she should do next. She knew what she had to do next, she had already spent an hour downing a glass of wine thinking about what she should do with Chelsea and now it was her time to act.

Alexandra ran to her closet and picked out the most sluttiest outfit she could find and grabbed strappy heals placing everything on, with a bit of difficulty swaggering from side to side. She hailed a cab and told the driver Chelsea's address and they were off.

Alexandra had never done this before but she knew it was just something she had to do in her life. She needed to be spontaneous, she needed to feel and taste the world that Chelsea was apart of.

Once she was there she paid the cab driver and hobbled up the stairs and buzzed Chelsea's apartment. Alexandra patiently waited for a response from Chelsea on her toes clicking her heals together nervously.

"Hello?" Chelsea's voice brought chills down Alexandra's spine and she smiled into the intercom.

"It's me. Can I come in?"

Chelsea looked at her intercom shocked not expecting this at all. Alexandra didn't seem like a girl for surprises. She didn't even seem like the type to leave the cap off of the toothpaste!

"Um, of course." Chelsea buzzed her in and waited to hear her footsteps at her door. Just a few minutes later, she heard her heals clicking lightly against the floor of the hallway and a knock on the door. Chelsea opened it up with a smiling until she saw Alexandra.

What she was wearing made Chelsea was to ravish her right there on the spot; a mini-skirt with a lace up top and strappy heals. Alexandra's long legs so soft and succulent. The look in Alexandra's eyes was also shocking, Chelsea had never gotten such a lustful look from her ever, this time, Chelsea was being sought out.

"Alex, you okay?" Just then Alexandra slammed the door closed and pushed Chelsea up against the adjacent wall kissing her passionately. At that moment Chelsea tasted the wine on Alexandra's lips and pulled her off of her.

"Alexandra, you've been drinking."

Alexandra rolled her eyes and tried to kiss Chelsea again but Chelsea stopped her.

"Chelsea, I'm sober enough to know that I want you right now. Chelsea please?" Alexandra sort of knew what she was doing, she might have been all confused in the head but she knew that this was what she wanted right now at this moment. She wanted Chelsea to take her to the bedroom and give Chelsea all the power in the world to do with Alexandra's body as she pleased.

"You sure? Because, I can tell you now, Alexandra. It's really hard for me to try and keep my hands off of you." Chelsea glanced over her again biting her lip trying to hold herself back from completely ravishing Alexandra's body. However, Alexandra just smirked and walked into Chelsea's bedroom, dragging Chelsea with her.

"But I want you to." With that opening invitation, Chelsea took hold of Alexandra's waist and her head into her hands. She kissed her passionately, bringing her hands up to caress her. Alexandra kissed back with just as much passion, giving in completely to Chelsea's whim.

And that night, Alexandra succumbed to Chelsea's world, entering one completely unlike her own. Alexandra and Chelsea both never thought that something like this could be possible.

However, as magical and special of a night as that was to Alexandra, after all that she knew she couldn't tell Chelsea that she wanted to be with her.

---

Waking up early the next morning Alexandra tried to sneak out, playing her clothes back on and grabbing her shoes. As she crept towards the door a voice that was once so softly spoken to her, was harsh.

"Running away?" Chelsea stood there, in her short shorts and slightly larger than her cream colored cassimere sweater, her nipples clearly seen through and hard, along with the hickey Alexandra left her by her left nipple.

"I-I'm sorry Chelsea, I would have called you..." Alexandra choked on her words, knowing that even though she didn't want to leave Chelsea, a part of her had to. As much as she was beginning to see how she loved Chelsea, she couldn't live up to that fact right now. It wasn't something that she was ready to handle at this point in her life.

"'I'm sorry,'? That's all you have to say after you beg me last to fucking make love you, and you do THIS?!" Chelsea yelled pushing a frightened Alexandra up against the wall. Chelsea wanted Alexandra to see how angry she was.

"Chels, please! I just, I can't do this! I don't think I can try and be with you. Please don't make this hard on either of us?" Tears fell from Alexandra's eyes and Chelsea just couldn't understand the spectacle. First Alexandra wants to make love, then she wants to leave, and now she's crying because she's leaving.

"If you love me, why deny it?" Chelsea asked taking Alexandra by her chin and forcing her to look into Chelsea's eyes.

"Because...I just don't know if I can handle myself. I just, Chelsea it's too complicated." Chelsea gritted her teeth and punched the wall by Alexandra's head. Alexandra flinched and only cried more seeing how much she was causing distress to Chelsea.

"Pitiful. You think you’re the only fucking one who's ever had to go through this? Fuck! I wish I had someone by my side when I was figuring myself out, but if you don't want to give me a chance Alexandra, then get the fuck out of my house and I promise to never, never try to love you again." Chelsea glared at Alexandra who stood there staring at her in disbelief. Part of her wanted Chelsea to love her forever, but another part told her that she needed to walk out that door.

Alexandra made a move to kiss Chelsea and Chelsea just turned her head away. She moved away from pinning Alexandra to the wall and stepped back, letting her head fall to the ground. Her long dark hair covered her face; it was straight and not placed in the tight crazy curls Alexandra was used to from Chelsea. Alexandra took a deep breath trying to hold back more tears and bit her lip.

"I will always love you, Chelsea." And with that Alexandra left Chelsea, alone, in shock.

The one person she had opened her heart to, the one person she thought that maybe could love her the way she had never wanted to be loved until now, loved her but ran away from a fear and confusion that she wanted to figure out all on her own. Now Chelsea was the one left heartbroken as silent tears ran down her face. She would never for get Alexandra, nor would Alexandra ever forget Chelsea.