Status: hiatus until possible deletion and extreme rewrite
Sex, Booze & Tattoos
Worst Enemies
Elvira
“Well we gonna stand out in the cold all day or go inside?” I ask as a wind picks up.
Joey gives me a strange look that’s implying anything but ‘you’re my new best friend,’ and leads inside wordlessly.
Reagan
“Is she your friend or do you just work with her?” Joey mutters to me.
“Erm, she’s my friend why?” I ask in a sort of daze.
“Oh. She’s just a bit of a dick that’s all,” he says.
I look over my shoulder and see her with a strange expression, closed eyes and shaking her head...until one of her earphones falls out. She looks up and flips me off.
We get inside the building and walk through the corridors until we reach a dressing room.
“Uhm...do you mind if you take this night? I’m feeling a bit fucked and I’d rather go to the hotel room,” Elvira says after flicking through numerous girly magazines.
“Sure why not,” I say and throw her the key card.
We decided to treat ourselves and book into the five star hotel that Slipknot are also staying in because if it’s a big job and special occasion, going to a swanky hotel is just cool. Plus we live right across town.
Elvie nods and picks up her bag before striding out of the room, leaving me open to any kind of shame and humiliating demise there could possibly be....which with me, is only expected to be the worst.
I decide to let toxins be the brunt of the blame over any stupid acts, and pull some custom mixed blue vodka from one of my bags.
As time passes I feel progressively more pathetic for drinking alone. I delve into my bag of tricks once more and pull out some disgusting but cheap hard gum things I got ages ago that have been residing in a cupboard at home for a few months, seen as only a mistake. However, I still intend to eat them in hopes that they wouldn’t be so bad in this state of mind.
Time appears to pass slower than ever, as if purely to bore only myself.
I turn on the first form of music that comes into my clutches and it just happens to be Avenged Sevenfold, sweet, sweet bliss to take my mind off everything. Soon comes the time of Marilyn Manson, although that is interrupted by a distinct ringing of my mobile phone. I spit one of the sugared pieces of jelly from my mouth, as it tastes more like gasoline than anything edible, before drunkenly answer my phone.
“Yesum?” I ask, collapsing onto my back.
“Yo, when are you coming back?” Comes Elvira’s monotone voice from the device.
“Heh....I don’t know! Why do you need my sexx!?” I say seductively before laughing a lot.
“Are you drunk?” she asks.
“Nooooooo,” I reply, so obviously lying.
“Reag please try not to drink on the job. Boss is gonna kick your ass for this now.”
“Only if he finds out.”
“Yeah, yeah and if any of the band see you like that, whats gonna happen....boss will find out and ass kicking is imminent! I suggest you get to the hotel room now and save both of us,” Elvira says.
“What?”
“You heard.”
“Yeah but I forgot,” I say and get teary.
“Fucking ass! I’m coming to get you now,” the phone makes an annoying buzzing sound and I realise she’s hung up.
Around an hour passes, or it seems like an hour. I entertain that hour by staring at the cracks in the ceiling and naming them all; Bob, George, Frederick, Ned, Gertrude, Crotch-face and Elvira.
“Heheheheeee what a funny name crotch face...it looks like Elvira,” I whisper to myself.
“Reagan?! Reagan,” Elv calls then bursts into the room.
“Give me your phone,” she demands, taking it off the sofa then throwing my trench coat over me and all my shit into my bag before dragging it out of the door along with my staggering form.
After being thrown into a cab and driven to the hotel, Elvira and I are sat in a rather posh room watching MTV2 and eating random junk food, mixing it with alcohol.
“Hey when do ya think we’ll get yelled at for disappearing?” I ask.
“When our door gets knocked on or a phone rings,” Elv replies.
We continue to sip vodka and chew Pringles until there’s a knock on the door.
“Wayhey yelling time!” Elvira grins sarcastically and jumps off her bed to answer the door.
“I don’t think Joey likes you to be honest,” I sigh before the door opens.
“So you are here,” Joey stands at the door looking irate.
“Wow the magical Reagan was right,” she turns to look at you and claps her hands.
“What the hell happened?” Joey asks.
“Well, see if I told you then I’d have to kill you,” Elv says.
I try to think of an answer that won’t get anyone told off for but can’t.
“What does it matter, we didn’t need to be there,” I say
“If you didn’t need to be then why were you?”
“Cuz our boss thought it would be a good idea,” I say quietly.
“Well if you weren’t being a prick then I wouldn’t have left and she wouldn’t have left so the night wouldn’t have been a waste,” Elv starts.
“You’re blaming me for tonight being wasted! You’re incredible!”
‘Incredily sexy’ I think to myself with an unavoidable smirk.
“I’m blaming you for being a prick. It doesn’t make anybody in a good mood when they get shit off people when its unnecessary!”
“You pissed me off!”
“Well you pissed me off too!”
“Fuck you!” he says and walks off down the corridor.
“See ya tomorrow, honey!” Elvira scream after him before shutting the door. “What a mong” she flops onto her bed.
“I didn’t know he was such an asshole,” I sigh.
“Oh Reag he’s nice to you, just not to me,” she says like she doesn’t care.
“Mmm true. He’ll cool off with you, I’m sure of it,” I try and reassure her.
“HAH! Fuck if I care, darkling, fuck if I care,” she says then throws empty chocolate wrappers and Pringles tubes off her bed.
I do the same then throw my top across the room followed by my boots, fishnets and skirt then climb into bed with vodka. Elv copies so we sit getting drunk while watching boring psychology tv shows until we drown into sleep.
When I wake, I go for a shower as usual then get dressed in a black and red mini skirt, fitted t-shirt that I painted myself, red fishnets and New Rocks. I douse my face in white foundation before applying black lipgloss, liquid eyeliner and mascara. I go to sit on my bed and order room service then study for the time and realise that Elvira doesn’t need waking yet.
“Well we gonna stand out in the cold all day or go inside?” I ask as a wind picks up.
Joey gives me a strange look that’s implying anything but ‘you’re my new best friend,’ and leads inside wordlessly.
Reagan
“Is she your friend or do you just work with her?” Joey mutters to me.
“Erm, she’s my friend why?” I ask in a sort of daze.
“Oh. She’s just a bit of a dick that’s all,” he says.
I look over my shoulder and see her with a strange expression, closed eyes and shaking her head...until one of her earphones falls out. She looks up and flips me off.
We get inside the building and walk through the corridors until we reach a dressing room.
“Uhm...do you mind if you take this night? I’m feeling a bit fucked and I’d rather go to the hotel room,” Elvira says after flicking through numerous girly magazines.
“Sure why not,” I say and throw her the key card.
We decided to treat ourselves and book into the five star hotel that Slipknot are also staying in because if it’s a big job and special occasion, going to a swanky hotel is just cool. Plus we live right across town.
Elvie nods and picks up her bag before striding out of the room, leaving me open to any kind of shame and humiliating demise there could possibly be....which with me, is only expected to be the worst.
I decide to let toxins be the brunt of the blame over any stupid acts, and pull some custom mixed blue vodka from one of my bags.
As time passes I feel progressively more pathetic for drinking alone. I delve into my bag of tricks once more and pull out some disgusting but cheap hard gum things I got ages ago that have been residing in a cupboard at home for a few months, seen as only a mistake. However, I still intend to eat them in hopes that they wouldn’t be so bad in this state of mind.
Time appears to pass slower than ever, as if purely to bore only myself.
I turn on the first form of music that comes into my clutches and it just happens to be Avenged Sevenfold, sweet, sweet bliss to take my mind off everything. Soon comes the time of Marilyn Manson, although that is interrupted by a distinct ringing of my mobile phone. I spit one of the sugared pieces of jelly from my mouth, as it tastes more like gasoline than anything edible, before drunkenly answer my phone.
“Yesum?” I ask, collapsing onto my back.
“Yo, when are you coming back?” Comes Elvira’s monotone voice from the device.
“Heh....I don’t know! Why do you need my sexx!?” I say seductively before laughing a lot.
“Are you drunk?” she asks.
“Nooooooo,” I reply, so obviously lying.
“Reag please try not to drink on the job. Boss is gonna kick your ass for this now.”
“Only if he finds out.”
“Yeah, yeah and if any of the band see you like that, whats gonna happen....boss will find out and ass kicking is imminent! I suggest you get to the hotel room now and save both of us,” Elvira says.
“What?”
“You heard.”
“Yeah but I forgot,” I say and get teary.
“Fucking ass! I’m coming to get you now,” the phone makes an annoying buzzing sound and I realise she’s hung up.
Around an hour passes, or it seems like an hour. I entertain that hour by staring at the cracks in the ceiling and naming them all; Bob, George, Frederick, Ned, Gertrude, Crotch-face and Elvira.
“Heheheheeee what a funny name crotch face...it looks like Elvira,” I whisper to myself.
“Reagan?! Reagan,” Elv calls then bursts into the room.
“Give me your phone,” she demands, taking it off the sofa then throwing my trench coat over me and all my shit into my bag before dragging it out of the door along with my staggering form.
After being thrown into a cab and driven to the hotel, Elvira and I are sat in a rather posh room watching MTV2 and eating random junk food, mixing it with alcohol.
“Hey when do ya think we’ll get yelled at for disappearing?” I ask.
“When our door gets knocked on or a phone rings,” Elv replies.
We continue to sip vodka and chew Pringles until there’s a knock on the door.
“Wayhey yelling time!” Elvira grins sarcastically and jumps off her bed to answer the door.
“I don’t think Joey likes you to be honest,” I sigh before the door opens.
“So you are here,” Joey stands at the door looking irate.
“Wow the magical Reagan was right,” she turns to look at you and claps her hands.
“What the hell happened?” Joey asks.
“Well, see if I told you then I’d have to kill you,” Elv says.
I try to think of an answer that won’t get anyone told off for but can’t.
“What does it matter, we didn’t need to be there,” I say
“If you didn’t need to be then why were you?”
“Cuz our boss thought it would be a good idea,” I say quietly.
“Well if you weren’t being a prick then I wouldn’t have left and she wouldn’t have left so the night wouldn’t have been a waste,” Elv starts.
“You’re blaming me for tonight being wasted! You’re incredible!”
‘Incredily sexy’ I think to myself with an unavoidable smirk.
“I’m blaming you for being a prick. It doesn’t make anybody in a good mood when they get shit off people when its unnecessary!”
“You pissed me off!”
“Well you pissed me off too!”
“Fuck you!” he says and walks off down the corridor.
“See ya tomorrow, honey!” Elvira scream after him before shutting the door. “What a mong” she flops onto her bed.
“I didn’t know he was such an asshole,” I sigh.
“Oh Reag he’s nice to you, just not to me,” she says like she doesn’t care.
“Mmm true. He’ll cool off with you, I’m sure of it,” I try and reassure her.
“HAH! Fuck if I care, darkling, fuck if I care,” she says then throws empty chocolate wrappers and Pringles tubes off her bed.
I do the same then throw my top across the room followed by my boots, fishnets and skirt then climb into bed with vodka. Elv copies so we sit getting drunk while watching boring psychology tv shows until we drown into sleep.
When I wake, I go for a shower as usual then get dressed in a black and red mini skirt, fitted t-shirt that I painted myself, red fishnets and New Rocks. I douse my face in white foundation before applying black lipgloss, liquid eyeliner and mascara. I go to sit on my bed and order room service then study for the time and realise that Elvira doesn’t need waking yet.