I Accidently Kidnapped the Joker. Crap.
V
Once inside my place I quickly shut and locked the door. The Joker still lay motionless on my new brown carpet as I considered where to put him. I didn’t want blood on my couch and, as inconsiderate as that may sound, I meant it. I could put him in my bed but I think it’s creepy for someone to wake up in another person’s bed. The only place I could really think of was to put him inside my bathtub. Hey it was clean ok so don’t patronize me. It’s not like I don’t care for the Joker just because he’s a murdering psychopath who wears more make up than Marilyn Manson. I smiled about the make-up part.
‘I can see him without the face paint’ I thought somewhat too excitedly. I walked over towards the small kitchen to turn on the lights but stopped. “Frick!” I cursed out loud as I stumbled over one of the many boxes the littered my entire apartment. Three weeks ago I moved and I still haven’t unpacked. When I finally made it to the kitchen I turned on the lights and walked towards my closet.
“It’s in here somewhere” I muttered to myself and shouted “Ah-Ha” when I found it. The dolly my dad lent me would come in a lot of help. It was a hand dolly, not the one you sat on when you were kid and rode down every hill you could find. I pulled it out of the closet and pushed it over to where the Joker was.
“Alright” I said as I heaved the body up against the back of the dolly. I smiled inside remembering when my dad used to push me on this dolly. Those were the good, easy years of my life. I then wheeled the Joker to my unusually small bathroom. It was small but at least it had a big tub. I just have to ask this. How funny or odd is the picture inside your head of the number one villain in Gotham City being pushed on a dolly in a body bag? I find it funny just not the whole situation. Once I turned on the light I started the bath water and turned the knob slightly to the left to get the water just hotter than luke warm.
As I laid the body onto the floor I shut the water off and threw a washcloth in the water. I cradled the Jokers head as I unzipped the black body bag. The smell of blood immediately hit my nose and became stronger as I opened it all the way.
The room was slowly becoming warm as the mirror was fogging. This told me the bath was perfect. I guess that’s what you could call conditioning. I removed his coat, socks and shoes and shirt. I then looked at his pants and hesitated. I had to do it. I then carefully dragged the body to the tub and slid his upper half into the water first, making sure he was leaning up. I then moved his legs into the water. Each one of my movements was slowly and daintily performed. Once he was in the tub I really took notice of what condition he was in.
His head was caked with crusted blood. Coagulated blood hung from the top of his eyebrow and a big spot of his hair was clumped together from the dark brown scab forming beneath it. His head looked better than I thought it would. I then began to examine his rib cage. I pushed on the left side of his ribs gently then his right side. I was surprised that none of them were broken. The only major concern was the large gash on his left side. A deep purple bruise had already formed and was only going to get darker. His legs seemed fine but the only thing I was afraid of was his left hip.
I had hit the Joker on his whole left side with my car and I had to make sure I didn’t fracture his hip. Although he walked fine you could never tell with a person who had a very high pain tolerance. I pushed harder on his hip and began to move my fingers in a circular motion. Again I was shocked that it was ok. Nothing was broken, fractured or even chipped. I was satisfied that nothing major was broken but I still was worried about possible head trauma or internal bleeding.
The wash cloth floated past my hand as I scooped up the still warm water onto the Joker’s chest. I picked up the white cloth and rung it over his dark yellow-green and now bloody hair. I couldn’t help but smile at his face but I went wide eyed when I began to wipe the cloth over his face. “Whoa baby...” I breathed.
I did NOT expect this.
‘I can see him without the face paint’ I thought somewhat too excitedly. I walked over towards the small kitchen to turn on the lights but stopped. “Frick!” I cursed out loud as I stumbled over one of the many boxes the littered my entire apartment. Three weeks ago I moved and I still haven’t unpacked. When I finally made it to the kitchen I turned on the lights and walked towards my closet.
“It’s in here somewhere” I muttered to myself and shouted “Ah-Ha” when I found it. The dolly my dad lent me would come in a lot of help. It was a hand dolly, not the one you sat on when you were kid and rode down every hill you could find. I pulled it out of the closet and pushed it over to where the Joker was.
“Alright” I said as I heaved the body up against the back of the dolly. I smiled inside remembering when my dad used to push me on this dolly. Those were the good, easy years of my life. I then wheeled the Joker to my unusually small bathroom. It was small but at least it had a big tub. I just have to ask this. How funny or odd is the picture inside your head of the number one villain in Gotham City being pushed on a dolly in a body bag? I find it funny just not the whole situation. Once I turned on the light I started the bath water and turned the knob slightly to the left to get the water just hotter than luke warm.
As I laid the body onto the floor I shut the water off and threw a washcloth in the water. I cradled the Jokers head as I unzipped the black body bag. The smell of blood immediately hit my nose and became stronger as I opened it all the way.
The room was slowly becoming warm as the mirror was fogging. This told me the bath was perfect. I guess that’s what you could call conditioning. I removed his coat, socks and shoes and shirt. I then looked at his pants and hesitated. I had to do it. I then carefully dragged the body to the tub and slid his upper half into the water first, making sure he was leaning up. I then moved his legs into the water. Each one of my movements was slowly and daintily performed. Once he was in the tub I really took notice of what condition he was in.
His head was caked with crusted blood. Coagulated blood hung from the top of his eyebrow and a big spot of his hair was clumped together from the dark brown scab forming beneath it. His head looked better than I thought it would. I then began to examine his rib cage. I pushed on the left side of his ribs gently then his right side. I was surprised that none of them were broken. The only major concern was the large gash on his left side. A deep purple bruise had already formed and was only going to get darker. His legs seemed fine but the only thing I was afraid of was his left hip.
I had hit the Joker on his whole left side with my car and I had to make sure I didn’t fracture his hip. Although he walked fine you could never tell with a person who had a very high pain tolerance. I pushed harder on his hip and began to move my fingers in a circular motion. Again I was shocked that it was ok. Nothing was broken, fractured or even chipped. I was satisfied that nothing major was broken but I still was worried about possible head trauma or internal bleeding.
The wash cloth floated past my hand as I scooped up the still warm water onto the Joker’s chest. I picked up the white cloth and rung it over his dark yellow-green and now bloody hair. I couldn’t help but smile at his face but I went wide eyed when I began to wipe the cloth over his face. “Whoa baby...” I breathed.
I did NOT expect this.
♠ ♠ ♠
I should mention that there are only 5 or 6 chapters left. Comments are always nice :) Next update is on Sunday. Thanks for reading.