For Keeps
Trois.
"Um, Shia, you stay in here." I said as I unbuckled the seat belt and opened the door, letting off the annoying beeping noise.
"Are you sure? What if he tries to... do something again?"
"Look, seeing a guy with me will only provoke him." I said, trying to convince Shia I would be okay on my own. We both knew I wasn't. "Okay, if I'm not down in ten minutes, come up. It's 13C, okay? That window there." I pointed to the third story window, glowing in the night.
"Alright..."
I punched in the code to open the front door and waved bravely to Shia, even though my stomach was turning, and stepped into the elevator, pushing three. Everything seemed so familiar, yet so different. I felt like a completely new person. I walked down the hallway, remembering the smells until I got to 13C. I could hear Nick watching the T.V. on the other side.
I took a deep breath and silently let it out, then twisted the door knob, knowing Nick never locks doors. He was sitting on the leather couch I bought the day we moved in together. He looked like he hadn't slept in days and next to him was another bottle of SKYY. My dog, Bubba was laying on the ground by the kitchen sink and could sense the tension in the apartment. Shirtless and wearing only a pair of gray jeans, Nick stumbled and began walking toward me.
"Rayne?" He whispered. "Is it really you?"
"Yeah, it's me. I'm just picking up my things and I'm gone." My heart was beating a mile a minute and my hands shook. To get to where our bedroom was, I'd have to cross him.
"No, you're not going anywhere." He was getting closer and my heart was beating faster.
"13C! 13C!" I heard Shia's yell from outside. The door flung open, revealing Shia, out of breath from running through the halls.
Nick quickly grabbed my wrists tightly. "Who's this?" He asked in his drunken stupor.
"Let go of her." Shia ordered. Ignoring him, Nick squeezed my wrists tighter and twisted them. I yelped in pain.
Shia raced over to Nick and knocked him to the ground, which might have been harder had Nick been sober.
"Go get your stuff!" Shia yelled as he pinned Nick on the ground. I ran to the bedroom and gathered what I could in the suitcase I kept under the bed. I could hear the grunts of the two guys in the living room battling as well as the sounds of Bubba barking. I grabbed what I could, mostly clothing and toiletries. After setting the record for fastest packing of a suitcase, I packed another bag full of money, credit cards, and photos, that I had kept hidden from Nick.
I quickly got out of the bedroom to see Nick writhing in pain and Shia holding him down. I picked up Bubba, suddenly gaining strength from the adrenaline and called for Shia. He got up and left Nick on the ground, too drunk and hurt to even get up. Shia grabbed my bags and we ran to his car, not even bothering to wait for the elevator. We quickly got into the truck, putting everything in the backseat and left.
We were silent the entire ride home. I wanted to cry, really, but I couldn't bring myself to it. I hadn't shed a single tear since I was eighteen years old, and that was the day I moved out of my grandmother's house. As many times as I tried to make myself cry, reliving bad memories, watching sad movies and music, I just couldn't. I always thought that I wasted my tears when I was younger, and instead of tears, I got blotchy skin and a red nose. The drive home was shorter than I remembered, only twenty five minutes, which could have been the fact the Shia was flooring it.
"Everything's going to be okay." Shia said soothingly as we sat in the car in the driveway. I hadn't even looked at Shia since leaving the apartment, and when I finally did look up at him, I noticed the bloody lip.
"Oh, Shia, I'm so sorry." My heart sunk in guilt, it was my fault another person was hurt. I reached my hand up to his cheek and looked at him. For the first time in a long time, I felt love.
We got out of the car and I held Bubba in my arms, never wanting to let go of his unconditional love. Of course the second we get inside he jumps from my arms and occupies himself with a pillow off the sofa. I followed Shia up the stairs and into my room where he set my things on the ground and sat on my bed. I could see him taking in my bedroom, and I was surprisingly comfortable with him there.
"Shia, I'm sorry." I said, sitting down next to him on my bed.
"Come here." Shia opened his arms for a hug that I gladly embraced back. "The guy was a jerk, Rayne. Don't think in any way that this is your fault. I'm not even hurt. Are you okay?"
"Yeah, yeah... I'll be okay." Sitting there in Shia's arms was enough, and I started crying, like
really crying. Years of tearless nights were down the drain and man, did it feel good to let go. Shia just let me sit in his arms and cry on his shoulder while my words made no sense. Hours later, at around three in the morning, I finally collected myself together.
"Tell me about China."
"What do you want to know?" He asked with a smirk.
"Why did you guys break up? I thought you were totally in love." I felt a wave of jealousy as I said that last part.
"Yeah, we were, but I didn't feel enough to stay with her. We were together for two and a half years, and I wasn't ready to take the next step." I could see that it was hard for him to talk about. "I'm still young, and I just didn't feel the same way she did." I sort of chuckled. "I've never told anybody this."
I smiled. "I haven't cried in four years."
I felt comfortable enough around Shia to reveal my secrets, little by little. He's seen me the most vulnerable I've ever been, and has been the only guy not to take advantage of that.
"Are you sure? What if he tries to... do something again?"
"Look, seeing a guy with me will only provoke him." I said, trying to convince Shia I would be okay on my own. We both knew I wasn't. "Okay, if I'm not down in ten minutes, come up. It's 13C, okay? That window there." I pointed to the third story window, glowing in the night.
"Alright..."
I punched in the code to open the front door and waved bravely to Shia, even though my stomach was turning, and stepped into the elevator, pushing three. Everything seemed so familiar, yet so different. I felt like a completely new person. I walked down the hallway, remembering the smells until I got to 13C. I could hear Nick watching the T.V. on the other side.
I took a deep breath and silently let it out, then twisted the door knob, knowing Nick never locks doors. He was sitting on the leather couch I bought the day we moved in together. He looked like he hadn't slept in days and next to him was another bottle of SKYY. My dog, Bubba was laying on the ground by the kitchen sink and could sense the tension in the apartment. Shirtless and wearing only a pair of gray jeans, Nick stumbled and began walking toward me.
"Rayne?" He whispered. "Is it really you?"
"Yeah, it's me. I'm just picking up my things and I'm gone." My heart was beating a mile a minute and my hands shook. To get to where our bedroom was, I'd have to cross him.
"No, you're not going anywhere." He was getting closer and my heart was beating faster.
"13C! 13C!" I heard Shia's yell from outside. The door flung open, revealing Shia, out of breath from running through the halls.
Nick quickly grabbed my wrists tightly. "Who's this?" He asked in his drunken stupor.
"Let go of her." Shia ordered. Ignoring him, Nick squeezed my wrists tighter and twisted them. I yelped in pain.
Shia raced over to Nick and knocked him to the ground, which might have been harder had Nick been sober.
"Go get your stuff!" Shia yelled as he pinned Nick on the ground. I ran to the bedroom and gathered what I could in the suitcase I kept under the bed. I could hear the grunts of the two guys in the living room battling as well as the sounds of Bubba barking. I grabbed what I could, mostly clothing and toiletries. After setting the record for fastest packing of a suitcase, I packed another bag full of money, credit cards, and photos, that I had kept hidden from Nick.
I quickly got out of the bedroom to see Nick writhing in pain and Shia holding him down. I picked up Bubba, suddenly gaining strength from the adrenaline and called for Shia. He got up and left Nick on the ground, too drunk and hurt to even get up. Shia grabbed my bags and we ran to his car, not even bothering to wait for the elevator. We quickly got into the truck, putting everything in the backseat and left.
We were silent the entire ride home. I wanted to cry, really, but I couldn't bring myself to it. I hadn't shed a single tear since I was eighteen years old, and that was the day I moved out of my grandmother's house. As many times as I tried to make myself cry, reliving bad memories, watching sad movies and music, I just couldn't. I always thought that I wasted my tears when I was younger, and instead of tears, I got blotchy skin and a red nose. The drive home was shorter than I remembered, only twenty five minutes, which could have been the fact the Shia was flooring it.
"Everything's going to be okay." Shia said soothingly as we sat in the car in the driveway. I hadn't even looked at Shia since leaving the apartment, and when I finally did look up at him, I noticed the bloody lip.
"Oh, Shia, I'm so sorry." My heart sunk in guilt, it was my fault another person was hurt. I reached my hand up to his cheek and looked at him. For the first time in a long time, I felt love.
We got out of the car and I held Bubba in my arms, never wanting to let go of his unconditional love. Of course the second we get inside he jumps from my arms and occupies himself with a pillow off the sofa. I followed Shia up the stairs and into my room where he set my things on the ground and sat on my bed. I could see him taking in my bedroom, and I was surprisingly comfortable with him there.
"Shia, I'm sorry." I said, sitting down next to him on my bed.
"Come here." Shia opened his arms for a hug that I gladly embraced back. "The guy was a jerk, Rayne. Don't think in any way that this is your fault. I'm not even hurt. Are you okay?"
"Yeah, yeah... I'll be okay." Sitting there in Shia's arms was enough, and I started crying, like
really crying. Years of tearless nights were down the drain and man, did it feel good to let go. Shia just let me sit in his arms and cry on his shoulder while my words made no sense. Hours later, at around three in the morning, I finally collected myself together.
"Tell me about China."
"What do you want to know?" He asked with a smirk.
"Why did you guys break up? I thought you were totally in love." I felt a wave of jealousy as I said that last part.
"Yeah, we were, but I didn't feel enough to stay with her. We were together for two and a half years, and I wasn't ready to take the next step." I could see that it was hard for him to talk about. "I'm still young, and I just didn't feel the same way she did." I sort of chuckled. "I've never told anybody this."
I smiled. "I haven't cried in four years."
I felt comfortable enough around Shia to reveal my secrets, little by little. He's seen me the most vulnerable I've ever been, and has been the only guy not to take advantage of that.