All My Balloons Are Popping

“There is nothing we can do now, the sun is coming up soon and I personally haven’t been to sleep in a while so I vote for bed.” Said Callia in an even tone.

“I second that motion,” says Billy as he gets up and follows Callia down the hall. I turn to Eagan who was gathering his blanket and pillows from the corner. I was surprised that he still wanted to stay here even after what he just saw. I hadn’t known him very long but we had a strange connection from the very first moment I saw him in the library. I’ve known Cobra even less and I’m already bound to him forever. Maybe it doesn’t matter how long you know someone, when there is a connection there is a connection.

“Did you have someplace your staying?” I turn to ask Cobra. Secretly I was hoping he would say yes. I needed some time to think about everything that has been going on.

But of course… “I’m staying where ever you are.” That would be sweet if I wasn’t so freaked out that I would be sharing my bed with a man for the first time. O God what if this is sort of our wedding night? What if he tries something? O I’m so not ready for this! I know that I am twenty years old but I never did get out much. O no!

I was grateful that Cal wasn’t in the room. If she had been then she would have heard my thoughts and shushed me for being unreasonable. She would say. “You’re twenty years old Sky its time you start living, you’re going to live forever so why not start now?” she would talk me through the sex part and wink at me when I left to become a woman. But I wasn’t sure if this was what I wanted, and honestly I wasn’t sure I trusted Cobra.

I gave Cobra a hesitant smile and rushed off to my bedroom. I felt like a small child as I stood in room waiting for Cobra to join me. I faced the wall opposite the door and flinched when to door opened slowing allowing Cobra to enter. He walked up behind me and caressed my arms. He kissed the top of my head and I couldn’t help but flinch again. I started to tremble when he moved his hands to my stomach to hug me from behind.

“O this wont due.” He said in my ear. My heart stopped from fear. “These curtains wont block the sun nearly well enough. Do you have anything we can drape over them?” I breathed out slowly. I hadn’t realized I was holding my breath.

“Yes I do actually.” Callia bought me some blackout curtain as a gag gift one year saying that if I ever felt like catching fire to put these up. I never thought I would need them but I guess I do now. I pulled out the curtains from the closet and grabbed the latter from the closet in the hall. Cobra was very tall but not quite tall enough to reach the ceiling rod. As he changes the curtains I went to the bathroom to change my clothes. I wasn’t ready to let anyone see me naked.

As I exited the bathroom I nearly flatted Eagan when I ran into him. He grabbed my arms to steady me but said nothing. He always seemed to be keeping me from falling. I felt his eyes on me; I could always feel those beautiful green eyes when they looked at me no matter how disappointed they were.

“Are you okay?” he asked me as he held me way from his body but he never let go of me. He looked down at my flannel PJs and smiled. I knew at that moment when he asked me if I was okay he was talking about with Cobra. I smiled too. Eagan was jealous and I liked that fact that he was.

“Yeah I’m fine.” I said looking down at his hands on my arms.

“I’m glad.” He sounded almost embarrassed that he was happy. All I could do was nod. “We haven’t had much time to talk lately. I was wondering if you would like to stay up with me a bit.” He sounded so sincere it broke my heart. Just as I was about to say yes Cobra opens the bedroom door and for a moment I thought I saw anger flash in his eyes. It only lasted for a second and then was gone.

“Is everything alright?” Cobra asked in that tone that sounded more like he was saying, “stay away from my girl.” I never liked the idea of a man being protective over me. I blushed with embarrassment.

“Yeah everything is fine.” I said back

“Are you coming the sun is coming up in an hour it’s a good idea that you get some rest.”

I nodded and disappeared behind my door. Cobra lingered a second and I imagined that stare down the two boys were giving each other. I got into bed completely covering myself with blankets. A few seconds later I could feel Cobra laying in bed next to me. My heartbeat went faster, please just go to sleep please just go to sleep I chant to myself.

“Are you cold, your shivering?”

I’m pretty sure I wasn’t shivering. Actually I was sweating under all the blankets and the flannel PJs, but Cobra ignored the obvious and spooned his body next to mine draping his arm around my waist. We laid back to front. “ How are you feeling?” he asked me. I turned over onto my back surprised by his question. He was leaning on this elbow so he could look down at me. My heart felt like it was going to beat out of my chest. No, no, no, please no.

“You are so beautiful.” He leaned down over me and kissed me deeply. I liked kissing him. He tasted exotic and powerful. It was unnerving and fun at the same time. He held my hands over my head with a gentle grip. I was getting into the kissing but my mind was racing at the same time. He lowered his hand to my waist lifting my shirt so he could play with the skin on my stomach. He calloused hands sent shivers over my body. For a second I tired to talk myself into relaxing and letting things happen

I can do this.

Cobra shifted so that he was on top of me but he held himself up with his arms. Our bodies barely touched. I was feeling more confident. He left me only for a second so he could remove his shirt. He body was beautiful. There wasn’t a single defect plaguing his pale brown skin. I was weird to think of his skin as pale with such a complexion but there was something about him that said “pale”.

He lowered himself back on top of me. His weight was comforting never mind his size. He glided his hands down my side and move to my stomach again. He lifted the hem of my shirt and pulled it over my head. It was bizarre being this exposed to someone who is practically a stranger. My common sense started to kick back in. he pulled way from my mouth to kiss my neck. My breath was coming faster now but his was silent. He didn’t need to breath. He could spend all the time he wasn’t kissing me without a breath.

His hand caressed my still clothed legs; I start to shake even more. This seems to make him more intense. Suddenly he moves to my stomach one more time but this time be lowers his hand and pulls on the draw string of my pants.

NO!

“Stop!”

“What? What’s wrong?” He doesn’t move his body only his head so that he can look at me. I push him away from me trying to get space between us.

“I need you to stop.”

“Why.” I don’t know if I imagined it but his voiced cracked like he was whining. That was a major turn off for me.

“I’m not ready I want you to stop. Get off of me.” I push harder.

“We are going to be together forever. You don’t have to be scared I wont hurt you.” He kissed me to try to prove his point. I pushed him back again.

“Yes we do have forever so there is no rush” I tired to grab my shirt from the floor. Cobra sighed heavily and pushed away from me.

“Fine!” he laid as far from me as he could and turned over on his side. He was pouting. I felt bad about what happened but I had to do what I had to do. I wasn’t ready and he had to understand that. I turned over onto my side and quickly fell asleep. My so-called “husband” and I spent our first night (day) sleeping back to back. That’s not what I would call a Kodak moment