We're All Stars Now

Kyle and I had been up to New York several times in the past few months. Kyle loved going into the city by himself and just discovering new places and things that he had never experienced before. He often left me with Haley and Gabe, which I didn't mind. Kyle was always in a much better mood when he had his own time.

I hadn't seen Nate since I ate with him in the middle of the night. It really hurt, but he had told me last time we had talked that he just wasn't ready to see me yet. I was understanding, and I wanted nothing more than for him to deal with things in his own time. But I just couldn't stand not seeing my best friend when I knew he was just up the street.

Kyle and I were currently on the plane up to New York for one last visit while we were free. Kyle was going on tour soon, and I was staying at home and going back to school for a semester.

"Do you mind when we land, that you take our stuff up to Gabe's and Haley's apartment? I think I'm going to go ahead and get a little free time before later tonight so we can go out tonight," Kyle said.

"No, that's fine," I smiled to him.

"Thanks, I'll make it up to you tonight. How about you can drink all you want, and I'll watch out for you. We can switch positions tonight," Kyle smiled. He picked up my hand and kissed the back of it.

"Deal."

When we reached the airport, Kyle helped me take the luggage out to the curb and put it into a cab. He gave me money, a kiss on the cheek, and a wave before heading out on what Haley and I jokingly called "a spiritual adventure."

I rode in silence to Haley and Gabe's apartment. Gabe met me at the door and helped me take my things in. He chattered away about he was so excited about releasing the new album, which song was his favorite, and other things as we rode an elevator up to his floor.

"And we have some very important news for you!" Gabe squealed as the elevator doors opened. "I've been dying to tell you, but Haley asked me to wait because she wanted to tell you in person."

"Really now?"

"Yes, come on. Let's go put your stuff down and talk to Haley."

"Alright, tell me. What's all this fuss about? Gabe is just going on and on about something you have to tell me," I said as I gave Haley a hug.

"He didn't give away any secrets did he? I'll be so upset if he did," Haley asked, glancing at Gabe.

"No he didn't, but I'm dying to know. So, do tell."

"Well, Gabe and I just found out three weeks ago. And I knew you were planning on coming, so I wanted to wait until you got here. I kind of wanted Kyle here too, but I know you don't want to wait on his slow ass," Haley said, starting to ramble.

"You're drifting," I grinned, steering her back to the original conversation.

"Okay, well, here it goes. Gabe and I are going to have a baby!"

"What," I squealed in delight.

"Yeah, we weren't expecting it at all. But we were so happy when we heard from the doctor. I've never been so proud in my life. I just want to be a good mom," Haley said as tears rolled down her cheeks, causing my own tears to overflow.

"You'll be the best mom, and Gabe will be the best dad. You two will be wonderful, loving parents. Do you know what the baby is yet?"

"No, it's still to early to tell."

"Thought of any good names. I've always thought you should name your child Kelsi personally," I said giggling.

"Well, we've been thinking. Gabe is naming it if it's a girl and I'm naming it if it's a boy."

"What does Gabe like?"

"He is in love with the name Marley for some reason. I don't know why, but if the baby is a girl, he's decided on Marley Joy. He said he liked Joy for a middle name because of all the joy she would bring us. And he does have a point."

"What's your pick for the boy?"

"Oh, I'm really leaning toward Oliver James. I've always loved the name Oliver."

"Oliver is cute. Are you and Gabe planning on getting married?"

"Well," she hesitated for a minute before continuing. "See, the thing is, we know we want to get married. More than anything do I want to marry Gabe. But with a baby on the way, we need to make sure we can take care of it before we decided to spend our money on dresses, cakes, and all the other things. We're just waiting."

"Wow, I just can't believe you're going to be a mother," I sighed in awe.

"I know, it's a really scary thing almost. Knowing that not only do I have to take care of myself, but I have someone inside me that needs much more care than myself."

"It seems so beautiful, being pregnant I mean. I can't wait until Kyle and I decide to have kids," I smiled while day dreaming about what it would be like to have kids with Kyle. "Of course, that requires him to propose because I told him I never wanted kids without getting married."

"Kelsi, he will propose soon. You have to trust me on this. I have insight like you won't believe. I know it's coming."

Haley and I spent the next two hours looking through baby books, picking out clothes and cribs and all the things she would need.

"I've settled on the color red for a boy and purple for a girl," Haley said before she was interrupted.

"Hey, I'm here!"

"Hey baby," I said standing up to give Kyle a kiss. "How was you're afternoon?"

"It was amazing. I think we should all get ready, grab dessert, and hit up some clubs. I'll be the sober one for everyone tonight," Kyle said.

"I'll help keep an eye on Kelsi and Gabe," Haley said giving me a slight smile.

"No, no. You drink, I'll take care of everyone tonight."

"I can't drink."

"What, of course you can!"

"No Kyle, I can't. I'm pregnant."

"What?! No way! Congratulations," Kyle grinned leaning down to give Haley a swift kiss on the cheek. "Do you know what it is yet?"

"Not yet. Still got some time left before we can find out."

"Well that's wonderful news to hear. But at least you can be my sober buddy for the night. We can make fun of Kelsi and Gabe."

"Ha, oh yeah. You know how those two get when they drink together," Haley giggled at me.

"It's not my fault Gabe and I know how to throw down," I smiled.

"And I have news for you! It will change our lives for the best," Kyle smiled before walking into a bathroom to shower.

"Did you hear that," Haley squealed. "News that will change your lives for the best! Surely he's going to propose! When do you think he'll ask you?"

"I don't know! All I do know is that I have to look extra hot tonight."

"Kelsi, that will not be a problem. You should get a quick shower too, though. Just so it will make your hair work with you."

"Oh, good idea," I said jumping up.

Two hours later I was slipping on my shoes as I walked out into the living room. Everyone else was sitting in the living room watching TV. I sat down in Kyle's lap and kissed him.

"A few shots before we hit the road?" Gabe asked holding up two shot glasses and a bottle of vodka. I grinned, nodded, and jumped up to grab my shot glass.

Hours later, Gabe and I were up on stage singing karaoke with drinks in our hands. Kyle and Haley were sitting at a table in the back of the club. I could see Haley laughing hysterically, but Kyle was texting away on his phone.

I went up to the bar and ordered another drink before going to sit next to Kyle.

"Kelsi, I think this would be a good time to tell you the news," Kyle stated as I sat down next to him. "I've been trying to find the right way to do this, a way that was worthy of you."

I glanced over to look at Haley and Gabe. Haley was intently listening while trying to keep Gabe focused as well. I nodded my head, smiling, waiting for Kyle to continue.

"We've been together for a while now. And I've loved every minute that I've ever spent with you. I would never trade any of that for the world, and I believe it's time for us to take the next step in our lives."

I looked at Kyle, and I could already imagine our lives together. Getting married, having children, being a real family. It was what I had always wanted, and Haley was right, it was going to happen sooner than we expected.

"I think it's time we start seeing other people," Kyle said, still smiling at me. I was dumbfounded. I couldn't move, breathe, or think. "I know it seems like we should be together, but you have to know that our time is up. I've been seeing a model when I come to New York. Ever since that show a few months back. She really understands me."

I stared at Kyle, not making an attempt to respond. Gabe wasn't really paying attention, but Haley was shocked. Her eyes darted back and forth between Kyle and me.

"I'm so glad you see things this way. I'll just be off now. I'm meeting Adrian and we're picking up my things from the apartment. We'll see y'all around sometime. Bye Kelsi, it's been great," Kyle said before kissing my cheek.

I didn't even try and move. Haley quickly jumped up and followed Kyle outside of the club. Gabe moved over next to me and patted my shoulder, even though I doubted he knew the real reason as to why he was doing it.

***************

I woke up sometime later feeling like shit. I moaned, rolling over to grab my cell. The clock read four a.m., leaving me to moan once more. I wasn't sure what time we had gotten in, but I just remembered taking six shots while Haley was gone after Kyle.

I sat up in the bed and looked around. Coming from underneath the door a line of light came across the bedroom floor. I quietly got out of bed and tip-toed to the door. Pressing my ear against the door, I could hear a muffled voice.

"Look thanks so much. I'm going to catch some rest before morning. You can crash on the couch if you want. I just knew everything would be okay if you came," Haley whispered. So low in fact that she was almost silent through the door. I heard her feet shuffle past my door and into her room. I waited a few minutes after Haley's door closed before I opened mine.

Curious to see who was in the house, I walked slowly into kitchen. Sitting at the table drinking from a coffee mug was Nate. He looked up at me, and set his coffee mug on the table. He stood up and walked in front of me. Opening his arms, he spoke, "I'm so sorry this happened to you. You deserve so much better."

Before I knew it, I was in Nate's arms, crying about Kyle. I really didn't want to shed tears over Kyle, but it was more for my lost life. I didn't know how to operate on my own, or how to function without Kyle with me. I felt like I learning to walk again.

Nate helped me over to the couch where I continued to cry in his arms for more than an hour. He held me close, cooing in my ear trying to make me feel better. Finally, when it seemed like I cried all my tears out, I feel asleep in Nate's arms on the couch.

I woke up alone around lunchtime that afternoon. My face was swollen and sore from all the crying. I walked into the bathroom to wash my face and clean up. The door creaked open, and Haley stood in the doorway watching me.

"Are you going to be okay?"

"I don't know," I answered honestly. "I was not anticipating this at all. I thought..."

"I know, and I'm sorry. I shouldn't have got your hopes up like I did. Honestly I don't think any of us saw that coming. I wish there was some way I could have protected you from that," Haley said quietly.

"There was no way you could have protected me from that. I guess this is just something that has to happen for me to be able to move on in my life. Not that I wanted to move on without Kyle, but I guess only I can't have my cake and eat it too."

"Oh Kelsi, I just feel so horrible. And I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable by calling Nate. He is the only person I could think of that would possibly make you feel better."

"No, I'm very happy to Nate," I sighed in relief. Knowing Nate was there for me still made me feel so much safer.

"Really? He said that you might not be happy to see him, something about him not being a very good friend in the past few months."

"Oh, yeah. That's no big deal, I was never angry at him. Where is he at?"

"He's in mine and Gabe's room watching TV. He said he wanted to be alone for a while, but I haven't heard anything of him in the past hour."

"Thanks, I'm just going to go check on him," I said softly making my way into Gabe and Haley's room. I pushed the door open slowly to see Nate asleep on the bed. The TV was turned down low, and he was laying on his stomach.

I sat down easily on the bed trying not to disturb Nate to much. I watched as he slept soundlessly, his chest rising and falling slowly to a rhythm. After what seemed like hours, when in reality it was merely a few minutes, Nate stirred. He rolled over, his arm hitting my leg. He picked his head up and blinked his eyes at me.

"Kelsi," he said quietly.

"Hi Nate," I said. He started to speak, but I cut him off quickly, "No, wait. Let me say something first. I know how hard it must have been for you last night. You know, feeling the way you do and having to come be with me. You shouldn't have come, I would have understood if you said no."

"Kelsi, there's nothing in the world that would stop me from helping you when you're hurting. I'll always be there for you," he said sitting up in the bed.

"Nate, I just wish you wouldn't do this to yourself," I said quietly, looking away.

"Hey," Nate said, placing a hand on my cheek, pulling me to face him. "I'm doing this on my own will. I'm doing this because I care about you."

I looked Nate in the eye, wishing that I could look away. Instead, I watched as he leaned in slowly, carefully before pressing his lips to mine.

***************

A little over six months had passed since Kyle broke up with me. I spent a lot of time, trying to find myself. I moved into a small apartment near Gabe and Haley. I kept busy with work and school. I was moving forward, slowly but surely.

Nate always was over at my apartment. Nate pleaded with me for us to become a public couple, but I refused him. At least, until I could get back on my feet and feel comfortable in a relationship again. Kyle still had left me scarred and confused about what I really wanted.

"I want you to come with me. We'll just go as friends," Nate said.

"Okay, okay. It's not like I'll have anything better to do. And it'll be nice to get out of the house. I haven't been out to a club in quite a while," I smiled.

"Great! I think we're all planning to leave at about nine thirty to be there about ten. And you can just go over to Gabe and Haley's around nine. That's where we're all meeting."

"Alright, that sounds good. I'll see you then?"

"Yeah, I've got to get going anyway. It's my mom's birthday today so I'm going to call her before we get going tonight. See you," Nate said before giving me a kiss on the cheek. He smiled and darted out of the apartment.

I smiled as I sat down to log onto my Twitter page before getting ready. I read through the post and nearly let my laptop tumble from my lap.

marcftsk: going to the new club Oasis tonight in NYC with my band. hope to see some of you there!

That meant that Kyle was going to be at the club tonight. I couldn't deal with that. I wasn't ready to face Kyle yet, and I had no idea when I would be ready. But I didn't want to let Nate down. He was really excited for us to hang out tonight. I eventually decided not to mention Kyle to anyone else and hope that all problems could be avoided.

I arrived at Gabe's a few minutes before nine thirty. Rushing down the sidewalk, I saw the apartment door open. "Where have you been? I've been trying to call you for ten minutes," Haley said sighing in relief.

"I'm so sorry. I had to help my neighbor, you know, the older lady. She was trying to get up her steps, but she didn't have her cane. I felt so bad for her. Then I spent ten minutes trying to get away because she wanted to reward me. I finally convinced her that I would visit her tomorrow afternoon to get my reward," I said pushing my hair back.

"It's fine. I was just worried that something happened to you, especially since it's nighttime."

"Alright, since we're all ready, can we go now," Gabe said, ushering us all into a cab he grabbed.

The four of us climbed into the cab, me sitting on Nate's lap. With Haley's pregnant stomach, there was no way she could physically sit in Gabe's lap. When we climbed out, the paparazzi where busy snapping photos of us all. A few asked Gabe and Haley about the baby, but many were focused on Nate and me.

"Nate, Kelsi, what exactly is the relationship between the two of you?"

"We're very close friends. Kelsi has been through a lot in the past months, and I've just been there to support her through it all," Nate answered smiling before pulling me into the club.

The club was amazing on the inside. Everyone was dancing, drinking, and having a good time. Haley found a table for the four of us on the second floor. We all walked up the stairs and looked down at the dancing crowd. We all ordered our own drinks, Haley's being non-alcoholic, of course.

After several drinks, Nate and I headed down to the dance floor. We danced through about three songs before agreeing to take a break. We headed over to a bare wall and relaxed against it. Nate spoke to me quietly, just talking about whatever was on his mind. Before long, Nate had me pinned lightly against the wall whispering into my left ear. That's when I saw him.

He was across the room, but there was no denying his tall frame and white hair. I tried to turn my face close to Nate, hoping to keep Kyle from recognizing my face. To my dismay, it didn't work. I locked eyes with Kyle, but I couldn't bring myself to look away.

Nate noticed how my body slightly tensed. He pulled away and eyed me, and he realized that I was looking at something in terror. As he turned around, he saw what I saw: Kyle walking in our general direction. Nate moved from me and stood next to me instead. I could tell he felt threatened by the way he tried to puff out his chest.

"Kelsi," Kyle said as he came closer. "Wow, it's been a while! How have you been?"

"I've been managing," I answered.

"That's amazing. How's Haley and the baby?"

"They're both fine. She and Gabe are here. You should go find them."

"Yeah, I probably will before the night is out. So listen, I've been thinking. I really regret the way I left you. It was stupid of me to think that I wouldn't hurt you with the way I did things. But anyway, things with Adrian really didn't work out, and we broke up about two months ago. I've really been doing a lot of thinking, and I realized how badly I screwed up. I've missed you so much, and I've wanted nothing more than to get you back," Kyle said, breathing heavily after his statement.

I felt Nate's body go rigid. I took several deep breaths before answering Kyle. "I'm sorry, I'm seeing someone else."

Kyle just stared at me, and Nate turned to face me. I could see the pain on his face although he was trying not to show it. The blank look on Kyle's face soon turned to rage. "Really now? And who exactly are you with."

"Him," I said nodding towards Nate and grabbing his hand. Kyle was furious, I could tell. He turned around and stormed away. I couldn't help but let a small smile play across my face. "That was intense."

"Yeah. You had me worried you were in a relationship for a minute," Nate smiled.

"But I am."

"Oh, with who," Nate responded sadly.

"With you silly," I smiled before kissing Nate quickly. "I don't want to wait any longer. I want to be with you. And only you."

"I know you don't want me to say what I really want to. I know you aren't ready for it. But I just want you to know I care about you," Nate grinned, wrapping his arms around my torso.

"Well, you're in luck because I care about you too," I said before pulling Nate in for a long, meaningful kiss.