Starts With A Needle

I blinked for the first time in nearly an hour. Sighing, I rolled out of bed and padded over to my desk. While it was signing on to AIM, I went downstairs quietly to make some breakfast before school. I went for the Cheerios, since Froot Loops were now taboo in my mind. I skipped the milk, so as not to penetrate the blissful darkness with artificial light. Eating quickly, and putting my bowl into the dishwasher, I silently flew back to the refuge of my room, locking the door.
I put all the essentials for the day onto my bed. A plain black turtleneck, my number of assorted colors of sex bracelets, hairbrush, converse, and a pair of dark wash skinnies. I dressed swiftly, and then started to brush my long brown hair. It hung straight to either side of my face, totally plain. My thick rectangular glasses made my eyes look a lot smaller then they actually were. If I took them off, my eyes were actually quite pretty. The only pretty thing about me. My eyelashes being naturally long, never needed any liner or mascara. Truth be told I was actually scared of makeup. No one ever looked me in the face though. I never let them.
If I left now, I would be at school right before the bell rang. It was my daily routine to slip in right before the bell, completely unnoticed. I pulled down the screen of my laptop, not bothering to shut it down. I shut my bedroom door on my way out. I never had to be careful with it. It's impossible to slam it. I didn't lock the front door behind me, since I didn't really care. I had nothing worth stealing, and my MP3 player -- which was the only thing I cared about -- was with me, day and night. The ear-buds rarely came out, I always feel like somethings missing when the noise isn't canceled out. You could basically call me a music whore. Music is the only thing that's there for me, through the screaming, the threats and tears. It's the only thing I can trust. I felt a drop of rain hit me on the nose. I didn't mind. I flipped my hood over my head, and kept walking at the same pace as before.
Getting to the door, no one looked at me, which I was used to. I headed straight to my locker, put my jacket inside, and got my books for first block. I ducked my head down, music by OT3P blasting in my ears. Someone took a step back, coming directly in my path, so being the klutz I am, I ran into them. My books scattered across the floor of the busy hallway. The guy just sneered at me and walked away with his group of followers. I sighed, and began to collect my things, having to squeeze through everyone. No one offered to help me. This, I was also used to. Once I was sure I had everything, I turned down the music and basically ran to my English 10 class, books clutched to my chest, head down. I sat in my usual seat in the back corner, pulling out my much abused notebook. Turning to a clean page, I began to write.
Today just started, and it's already awful. My midterms in two classes and I totally forgot everything I studied last night. Sarah can probably remind me during lunch, she has a weird way of doing that. I just want high school to be over. But I still have two more years. Life sucks. "DJ, what did you write your essay on?" My English teacher asked me from the front of the room. I felt my face heat up as I answered in my loudest voice.
"How the word blood shows Lady Macbeth’s twisted nature, and disregard for anyone else’s needs but her own."
"Very nice! Look forward to reading it." She said, turning back to the board. I sunk down in my seat when I heard Josh's remark about being a nerd, furiously blinking back tears. If only they knew I was actually failing this class... "Don't worry about it DJ." I thought to myself. I pulled out my cell phone under the desk, and text messaged Sarah about what had happened. She offered to beat up Josh, but I knew she couldn't actually do it. I couldn't let her be suspended just because I had low self esteem.
My nails sharply dug into my arm, under the sleeve of the turtleneck. I felt a little wetness under my finger, and realized I had broken the skin. I put as much pressure on it with my right hand as I could and asked if I could use the restroom. On my way out, I dared myself a look into the classroom, and was confused when I saw Josh's horrified look. Once in the quiet of the bathroom, I realized why.
I had apparently dug in more then I had realized, there was a steady flow of blood down to my fingertips. "Shit..." I turned on the cold water, trying my hardest to wash it all away. But it wouldn't stop bleeding. I felt myself sway, and sat down on the floor, knowing what was coming next. Josh's pale, terrified look was the last thing I though about before everything went black.