Discovering the Past

I heard a knock on the door.
“I´m coming” I screamed. But Gerard got there first.
“Must be the room service,” he said and went to open the door. I hadn’t told him what time Frank was coming to pick me up.
I knew it was Frank. I smirked.
Gerard was petrified at the door.
He turned around, emotionless.
“Rose, there is a ghost looking for you at the door.”

He had decided to continue this game of ignoring Frank and calling him a ghost.
I ran to the door.
“Hi,” He said in a small voice.
“C´mon in,” I pulled him in by the arm.
He was wearing a red t-shirt and a black coat.
His neck tattoos were visible now.
“Well, do you want to go out and grab some lunch?” He said, looking around nervously.
“Sure!” I almost yelled in excitement. Frank nodded and smiled.
“Rose!”
Gerard called to me from his bedroom.
I rolled my eyes.
“What?!” I went to his bedroom.
“Are you going somewhere?”
“We´re going to have lunch.”
“You can’t go out alone.”
“I´m not going alone, I’m going with Frank.” I rolled my eyes again.
“You´re mother trusts me to take care of you.”
“C´mon Gee, don´t be…”
“And she wouldn’t approve of this.”
“Since when are you on my mother´s side?”
He just gave me a glare.
“You´re not going out with the ghost.”
“But-”
“No buts…”
“Gerard, stop this game already!” I screamed, sure thing Frank heard me. “I’m going out with Frank, I’ll call you and tell you where I am and what time I’ll get back.”

Gerard just stood there, looking at me.
He came closer and whispered.
“I don´t think he´s mentally sane…”
“Stop it!”
I just left the room.

After a small walk we took a cab.
Frank said the name of a restaurant to the taxi driver.
I just looked out the window during the whole time; I could feel Frank’s nervousness next to me.
He had bags under his eyes, I wondered if the poor guy had any sleep. He had just found out that he had a daughter, a daughter he thought it was dead for the last 16 years; saw his former band member/boyfriend and came back to life, actually, everything in less than 24 hours.
“We´re here.”
It was a small restaurant, I recognized the area as near the place Frank used to live.
“I used to come here, it´s a nice place.”
I just nodded and smiled.
After the waitress took our orders an awkward silence fell over us.
I started to look at the people and Frank pretended to drink water.
“So…” He finally said “…Err. Do you like music?”
This was a safe territory from him. We could talk about music.
“Yeah.”
“What kind?” He looked a little more confident.
“Everything I guess. Rock most of the time,” He nodded, a little more enthusiastic.
“I like My Chemical Romance, it´s one of my favorites now.” His smile grew even bigger now.
We started to talk more and more, he told me a long list of bands that I should listen to and I told him about some new bands he hadn’t heard.
“And…do you…” He started to ask timidly. I could not yet process how this man, in his forties, was shy in front of me.
“Do you play something?”
“Yeah.”
“Really?!” He sounded excited.
I nodded. “Guitar,” It was my turn to be ashamed. He was a genius and I couldn´t even get Disenchanted right.
“That´s great! You have to got it too…it runs in the family.... My whole family…your family….Always played something…” He looked down. He said that his family was my family too, that sure felt good.
“I don´t know how much of that I got, I kind of suck.”
“Nah…” He looked alive and happy for the first time since I first saw him.. “You just need to practice and meet with a good teacher occasionally.” He rolled his eyes for some reason.
“You could teach me.”
He just smiled. “I don´t play anymore.”
“WHAT??!!!” I punched the table without intention. “WHY?” He looked around and smiled to the people around us looking me like I was crazy.
“Sorry,” I whispered. “How is that you don´t play?”
“I just lost the inspiration I guess.”
“You should tried again.”
He nodded. “What kind of guitar-”
“Electric, a Fender…”
“Good label. Are they still as good as they were?”
I chuckle. “I guess. Mine is old though.”
“Really?”
“It´s white.”
“I had one like that also… did you buy it or did someone give it to you?”
“Mikey gave it to me.”
“Mikey?”
“It was… I mean it’s yours. He said you used it at your last show with MCR, in New York.”
“Madison Square Garden, it was a hell of a show.” He looked away for a second
“You can have it, if you want, it´s yours anyway.”
“NO! I´m happy you have Frankmonster.”
“Who?”
“Frankmoster, it’s the name of the guitar.”
“Oh…”

I told him more about my life: school, friends, movies, favorite things like colors and foods, allergies, and child memories.
When we got to the topic of my mother his face changed a little.
“How is she?”
“She´s fine. She´s married.”
He didn´t seemed too excited with the subject.
“So you have a stepdad.”
“Joe”
He nodded.
The waitress came.
“The check please,” he said.
“And how long she´s been married?
“About 6 years.”
He nodded again, serious.
I started to get nervous.
“Joe is great; he loves my mom a lot and me. It took time for me to realize that, I was a bitch with him in the beginning.”
He smiled slightly.
“She´s sorry, you know?”
He just looked at some unknown point in space.
“She… never meant to hurt you, she was trying to protect herself and me, you… you left us at the beginning and she…”
“I´ll talk to her, don´t worry.”
I just nodded, happy that the subject was being dropped.
“So, what about the guys, how is Bob, Ray… Brian?”
I started to tell about their lives, Ray and his kid; Bob being skinny, Brian more grumpy, Mikey and Jr. I didn´t mention the boyfriend detail just yet.
I didn´t mention Gerard either.
“Jr. must be big.”
I smiled nervously, ”Yeah.”
“And Ali, how is she?”
My smile dropped.
“Oh” He didn´t know.
“She died Frank, about two years ago.”
He covered his mouth with his hand in surprise and horror.
“I´m sorry.”
“How…?” He said slowly.
“A car accident…”
“God. Poor Mikey!, Alicia was his life.”
“Yeah, he was very depressed, but Gerard helped him though.”
“I guess” He remained silence for a moment.
“We should go…” I thought I saw a tear but I wasn’t sure.
We walk randomly, it was a little late. The sun was starting to set.

“What about you? Tell me something,” I asked him.
“I think you already know a lot…”
I smiled.
“You should be a detective or something.”
I laughed.
“Well, I work at the retirement house. I like it, it´s peaceful…”
“I know that already.”
He started to look nervous again; he stopped walking and grabbed my shoulder.
“Listen Rose, all this is way too weird for me. Don´t get me wrong, I´m very honored that you have found me, but I don´t know what to do here,” He really looked confused and scared.
“What do you want me to do?”
I thought for a moment.
“I want to know you and you to know me.”
He sighed deeply. “That would be nice,” We smiled at each other.
“I´m sorry for not being a father for you.”
“It´s okay.”
“No it´s not,” He shook his head violently. “I want to make it up to you.” I thought for a moment.
“Come with us,” He stood still.
“Our plane leaves tomorrow night.”
“You should come to New York with us. Everybody would be so happy to see you.”
“I´m not so sure about that…”
“What??!! Are you crazy?”
Frank raised an eyebrow.
“Everybody flipped when we thought you were dead. Like crying, the whole shit.”
He looked shocked.
“They really miss you and love you”
“My job…I…“ He mumbled.
“Ask for vacation,” I grinned.
“I...I…”
“Please…”
“I´ll think about it.”