Hope Begins to Fade

Hope Begins to Fade Ch. 70- Believe in Me

Scar’s POV

I glanced at the rock which shined in the moonlight. It was so beautiful…

“So… you ready for pictures?” Brian laughed as we drew closer to the front door.

“Shit, really?” I sighed but laughed. “Sure, why the hell not?”

Before we stepped in the house, he pulled me in once again for a kiss that left me breathless.

We inhaled, opening the door just to be attacked by everyone. Instantly, Daytona grabbed my left hand, staring at the ring and squealing. “AWWW!!!”

Matt was the first to embrace me. He kissed my cheek and told me how happy he was for us both.

My mom cried, as expected. Val was comforting her but mom laughed a bit, getting my attention. “I really shouldn’t cry… it’s stupid. But, I’m just so happy for you!” she embraced me tightly, sobbing lightly on my shoulder. Out of the corner of my eye, I found daddy shaking his head at her, a smile on his features. Then he shook Brian’s hand, pulling him on for a half-hug.

“So, celebration?” Jaz questioned.

“Since you’re all dressed up, we might as well.” Zacky shrugged.

So, we all decided to go out to eat. After everyone ordered, they all sat around, throwing out names for the baby.

“I’m still telling ya, man…” Zacky said to Syn. “Name it Zacky Jr. Ya can’t go wrong with a name like that.”

“Yeah, that’s gonna happen…” Brian laughed.

We all laughed. “Nope, how bout Bob?” Daytona giggled. “Ha, Bob!”

“For the last time, Tona, I’m not freggin naming it Bob!” I called to her. They were all laughing.

“How bout Hope?” mom offered.

I stuck my tongue out, scrunching up my nose, making Matt send me a funny look. “Yeah, like I hope this baby’s good.” Brian laughed.

“Dude, with you as the father, that’s a definite fuck no!!” Zacky laughed. Brian glared at him. “What? It’s true, right Johnny?”

“Johnny’s too short to have a say in this shit.” Matt joked.

“Knew it was coming…” Johnny sighed, holding his head, a grin plastered slightly on his face.

“But, really.” Zacky continued, “If you don’t want the baby to be fucked up, there’s a reasonable way to counter it!”

“How?” I laughed.

He grinned. “By naming it Zacky Jr. of course!”

“Dude, just shut up!!!” Brian, Johnny, Matt, and Jimmy all yelled at him, each of them reaching over the table to hit Zacky which made the rest of us laugh.

“No more violence!” Zacky whined, holding onto Jaz.

“Yeah, hide behind your girlfriend, ya douche!” Jimmy called.

“She’ll protect me!” he said in a squeaky voice.

“Sorry, nope.” Jaz laughed.

“What!?” he was shocked, looking up at her.

“That’s my best friend. She’s not gonna name it after you!” Jaz shook her head.

“Yeah man. No one likes you.” Daytona laughed, getting a high five from Jimmy.

“You guys are all a bunch of losers!” I was giggling. “Sorry mom and dad, they always act like this. It’s nothing different.”

They nodded, almost shocked but laughing.

“You’re a loser too.” Zacky stuck his tongue out at me.

“Mr. Vengeance, put that tongue back into your mouth!” I folded my arms across my chest.

“And if I don’t?” he asked, tongue still out.

“I’ll stab it with a fork!” I replied. His tongue went back in his mouth instantly and he gave me a wide eyed expression.

“Dude, you suck.” Matt laughed, hitting Zacky on the shoulder.

“Guys, tomorrow’s when we go find out the gender. Then we can pick out a name.” I reminded them. Jimmy looked at me, pleadingly. “Yeah, ok Jimmy.” I sighed, knowing what he wanted. “We go find out the sex of the baby.”

“Ha, sex!” he laughed with Daytona. They clapped like the retards they were. God, they were good together…

Matt hit Jimmy, shaking his head.

The night was enjoyable. Lots of jokes, food, and just quality time together. But I had this strange feeling in the pit of my stomach. I needed to talk to Brian.

So when we got home, it was 1 and we wanted to sleep. Brian lay next to me now, kissing me.

“Hey, sweetie?”

“Hm?” he kissed my forehead then rested his head back on the pillow.

“What if we’re not ready for this?” I whispered. He sat up a bit, looking at me.

“What are you talking about? Sweetie, of course we’re ready for this.” He placed his hand on my shoulder. “We’re gonna have this baby, and we’re gonna be great parents.” I attempted to hide my tears but he had seen them and wiped them away gently.

“I know you’re gonna be a great daddy but… what if I’m a terrible mom?”

“I know you won’t be. You’re gonna be great. I mean, think of all those nights we talked. Remember all those morals you had? Like, not raising it how your parents raised you. It’ll calm you down by just talking again.”

I took a deep breath, repeating what I had so many times. But he’s right, telling how different tings are gonna be helps. “Well, my parents were too strict with some things that were stupid and it was bad. So, I want to raise it in-between. I don’t want it to have us and never come to tell us anything. Like when I grew up and did things that were stupid, like cutting, I couldn’t tell them. I want our kid to know that no matter what they can come to us and we’ll still love them. Still accept them for who they are. Of course we’re not gonna let them do some stuff but we’re gonna le them be a kid… I never had the chance. I grew up too fast. And I look back, I really should have spent more time with friends and doing kid things instead of always having somewhere to be. Something to do. And that was a lot from my parents. They got me into all these things that I HAD to do. It was annoying but I got used to it.”

“You never told me that.” He whispered.

“Yeah. Like, there was this thing I was in, had to wake up early every Saturday morning to go play my instrument for 2 hours. It sucked. And the second year, I didn’t want to do it. But you know that guilt trip your parents always put on you?” he nodded. “It was like that. With the, ‘if you don’t do this, that’s ok. It’s just not gonna help you when you’re applying for college. You’re gonna have all this stuff you did from school but nothing outside of school.’ Blah blah blah.”

“But…” he paused. “You didn’t even go to college, did you?”

“Nope. Wasted 4 years of my life doing that stupid wind symphony thing for nothing. Waking up at 6 a.m. every Saturday. For nothing.”

“God, your parents must have sucked.”

“That’s why I left.” I sighed. “And then I regretted that. I felt like they’d abandon me.” I shook my head. “But anyway, I don’t want to be like my mom was. She was overbearing, overprotective. No one likes moms like that.” I joked. “And our kid’s gonna love you! I mean, hell, you’re in an awesome band!” I laughed, now relaxed. This helped so much.

“And we have everyone supporting us.” Brian added. I nodded, thanking God for my friends. I rested back

“Thanks baby.” I let him kiss me.

“Any time.” He leaned back too. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

The feeling of fear now gone, I could sleep… in the arms of the man who believes in me.