This Could All End In Tragedy

I felt like I was on a hangover from hell. The kind you get after rough Friday nights at the weekly pier kegger.

I had my arm wrapped around Brandon while my feet barely moved.

I was completely and utterly exhausted from the days events. The funeral, the after party, the pathetic sympathy.

"Emily. Here. It's your room." he whispered as I heard the bedroom door open quietly. The house was packed tonight with family members coming to pay their last respects to mom and Ryan.

I groaned as I attempted to walk to the bed. Finally reaching my destination to the soft mattress I smiled as I felt the soft cotton pillow against my face.

I kicked my ballet flats off my feet and layed my body out.

I heard Brandon's soft footsteps against the wooden floor of the room.

"Em. Hun, you should change. You don't want to ruin your dress." he said softly while I heard the the soft shudder of my blinds shutting.

I groaned and flipped onto my stomach and felt the buckle of my dress dig into my belly button. I groaned again as I heard Brandon closing the curtains.

"Fine." I managed to groan out in my state of exhaustion.

I heard Brandon laugh while he was walking towards the door.

"You suck." I said as I lifted my body off the heavenly mattress.

"Yeah, yeah little lady. Hurry up and get ready for bed. We got like nine gazillion people wanting to use the bathroom." Brandon replied jokingly while walking out of my room.

I yawned once again while resting my head upon my bony knees. My feet fell flat on the solid wooden floor. I loved Cali. I could still hear the rain falling upon the glass window across from me.

I smiled as I heard Brandon's dog, Nadar bark from the room next to mine.

"Sh! Nadar, be quite. It's night night time. Go back to bed." I heard Brandon shush the little beagle as I heard the rain hitting the window.

I yawned again and felt my back stiffen.

"Emily? Hurry up woman. I need to shower. Uncle Brandon is dirty!" I heard Brandon yell from the hall way.

"I'm coming chubby." I said while getting up and waiting for his response.

"Hey! No. Fucking Nadar stop barking." I heard Brandon yell outside while running to the kitchen to get Nadar.

I started laughing while grabbing my bag from the ground before walking towards the door. I was too lazy to unpack earlier.

I walked across the hall into the bathroom to change and wash my face.

I changed out of my dress, carefully slipping it off my body and changed into a pair of comfortable soccer shorts and a plain green tank top.

I scrubbed and washed my face till all of the excess mascara was off.

I yawned while cleaning up and looked in the mirror again.

I had the curse of the pale lips. I never liked them. My lips were extremely chapped and gross from my amazing nervous habit of biting them, which I had done alot lately.

I sighed as I put my hair up in a messy ponytail.

I was ready for my beauty rest and trudged along to my room hanging my dress up in my closet along the way.

I finally hit the bed and wrapped my warm purple comforter around my body and was ready to sleep.

I layed down on my belly and layed my head to the right to look out the seams of my curtains.

I had an amazing view of the beach from my room, I loved it. I may have not been raised in California, but somewhere deep inside of me screamed California girl.

I heard a faint knock at my door and Nadars light barks.

"Em?" I heard Brandon ask.

"Yeah?" I called back, not bothering to get up and open it.

"If you need anything, you know where I'am. Night kiddo. Sleep well. Tomorrow morning Uncle Brandon is going to get his pancake on. Be prepared lady." I heard Brandon exclaim from outside.

I laughed lightly.

"Alright. Night chubby." I replied back laying my head back down.

"You're a bitch." I heard him reply back while laughing.

I smiled. It was time to sleep.

"So. Mom, do you have any names in mind?" I asked while splashing my feet in the water with a huge smile on my face as I felt the warm sun beat down on the pier we were sitting on.

I looked to my left, through my vintage sunglasses we had bought the other day to see her reply.

"Haha. Em, I'm only a few months along right now. I don't even know if it's a boy or girl yet." she replied while rubbing her stomach.

I laughed while still splashing my feet around.

"I know. But I'm kind of syked you know? I'm going to have a little sibling. I get to be the awesome older sister." I said while smiling at the thought of a kid running around the house within a few months. The thought excited me.

I heard my mom laugh louder.

I felt kind of embarrassed.

"Haha. Honey, it's okay. I'm pretty excited too. It's been fiveteen years since I've had to deal with morning sickness. How I love this feeling." I heard mom brag sarcastically.

That was the thing special between me and her. We could have conversations about anything, we were almost like sisters, but she was still my mother. And I loved her.

Maybe it was because she was still relatively young but she was one of my best friends. I could talk to her about boys, beer, clothes, anything. And she was just so awesome.

"So. Uhm. Are you nervous at all mom?" I remember asking while looking at my ruby red painted toenails through the clear water. I was too scared to look her in the face and ask her.

I heard her sigh from the left, I turned my head to the left to look at her.

"Em. Of course I'm nervous. But I'm supposed to be. I mean I'm having a goddamn kid." she replied while laughing lightly.

I smiled at her.

"But one things for sure. You're going to be an amazing older sister." she said softly while bringing her soft hand to my face and rubbing my left cheek with her thumb.

I smiled at her wide.

I looked at her beautiful face through my sunglasses. She had a matching pair on. Her amazing brunette locks fell down past her shoulders. Her full lips and big brown eyes looked back at me. I see why my dad had fell in love with her at such a young age.

I brought my hand up to her left cheek while giggling.

"And you're going to be an amazing mom, mom." I replied back.

She smiled back at me and kissed my forehead.

"So. While we're in Cali Em. Why don't we go check out some hottie surfers?" she asked while elbowing me in the side...

I gasped while my eyes opened wide.

I was afraid to open my eyes. So afraid.

I never believed in ghosts but right now I was fucking terrified.

My heart beated irregularly as sweat began to build around my forehead.

Should I open my eyes or not?

The question flooded my mind for God knows how long, till I decided to be a big girl and I flipped open my eyes.

I was almost afraid to move my head a square inch.

I began to breath in deeply as I saw no creepy white ghost things in my room.

As I began to relax, I heard the soft rain against the window and Grandpa Will's loud snoring from the room next door.

I may have relaxed but my heart was still racing.

I just needed to get out of here. I needed to think. And where did Emily Saller think best?

The pier.

I thought over in my head.

Without thinking too much, I threw the comforter off me while goosebumps ran up my bare shoulders and arms. I grabbed my cell phone off my dresser and walked towards my bedroom door.

I thought about what would happen if one of my family members freaked out because I wasn't in my bedroom.

I didn't think too hard upon the thought and planned how to get out of the beach house.

I sighed and quietly stood behind my bedroom door. I stared at the Kill Hannah poster in front of my face shining lightly from the moon beams seeping through the cracks in the curtains.

I quietly listened in to make sure nobody was awake.

All I heard was grandpa's loud snoring and the ocean waves outside.

I noiselessly and slowly cracked open the door just wide enough to let my small body slip through.

I stopped outside my door and looked both ways before tip-toeing to my left, to the large living room. I than quietly walked down the wooden stairs and tip-toed through the kitchen and stopped right in front of the large sliding door which lead to the deck.

I breathed in deeply and took a minute to take in my surroundings.

It was still raining outside, but not as hard as before. It was just drizzling now.

I undid the lock and quietly slid open the door.

I suddenly stopped when I heard small foot steps coming down the wooden stairs I had just ventured down.

The cell phone in my hand was covered in sweat.

I prepared for somebody to ask "What the hell?"

I quickly ran over some options in my head. I was sleep walking and didn't know what I was doing. Or maybe I was going to sleep outside in the rain. No maybe I was...

I than say Nadar, Brandons dog skip into the kitchen. I heard his little metal dog tags tap against each other.

I sighed in relief and looked down at the little guy.

I whispered just loud enough for the little dog to hear me.

"Nadar. Sh. Quite." I said while bringing my finger to my lips. Smart dog knew what I was saying because he than ran off to the living room to his bed to sleep.

I took in another deep breath while sliding open the screen net and shut the glass door behind me quietly. I left it unlocked and left the screen net to the side.

I than looked out onto the beach front.

The random beach lights were on and I could here the birds chirping through the light rain.

I felt cold but I was used to it now.

I walked barefoot off the large deck, down the stairs and onto the cold sand.

I loved how it squished in between my toes.

I loved how it was so calm and peaceful out here. I could just think without being disturbed.

I walked a few more minutes till I was close to the pier.

I looked at the random beach houses along the shore. All of them looked so dark inside with the random TV I could see from my spot on the beach now.

I smiled. Somebody was watching an episode of Family Guy.

I flipped open my cell phone to see numerous missed calls and texts from friends back in New York. I simply ignored them. There was time for that later.

It was currently "3:56 AM".

I walked to my right onto the pier.

The faint light coming from the light bulbs hung around the pier's wooden poles shined down on me.

It was still pretty dark, I liked it. Just the perfect ocean waves below me and the peaceful sky's light rain above me.

Back home in New York I would never ever leave the house this late at night. But here in Cali it was a different story. There was never any gang crime or random shoot outs here in the peaceful OC. I didn't need to worry. This area around the beach front was like a little community, everybody knew everyone.

I walked out towards the end of the pier. Too lazy to walk all the way out I stopped and sat down on the edge of the wooden pier on the side. I was probably about three fourths down on the side of the pier.

I placed my phone down next to me on the wooden surface and dipped my feet into the water. I feeling of relaxation took over. I was still pretty startled from the dream but right now I had a little calming feeling.

I splashed my feet around a little to get used to the cold water. The light rain showered down.

My hair was in a very messy bun. I took the hairtye out and let it flow down. It was lightly damp and it fell down to my chest. I loved how relaxed I felt.

My mind wandered to the time me and my dad saw the yearly dolphins swim through here. How excited I was. I remember my first time going to the weekly pier kegger with my friend Amy. Just all the amazing memories I had here.

And than my mind wandered back to the dream.

How I was sitting in the almost exact spot. With my alive mother.

This was it.

I couldn't keep it together anymore. Random outbursts and random crying sessions weren't going to cut it.

Out of nowhere it all came rushing back to me. The phone call from my dad. The cab ride to the hospital. The waiting room. It all flooded my mind once again.

The empty feeling that filled me that night. That one feeling that still haunted me.

Tears were slipping down my cheeks.

Before I knew it, I was gasping for air. My throat was clogged with emotion and mucus. My mind was filled with the thought of my mother no longer existing. The fact that I was never going to see her again.

I finally accepted it.

This was really it. I needed to realize she wasn't coming back.

I brought my freezing cold hands up to my face to wipe away tears that were still crashing down my face.

I was still gasping for breathe when I felt an odd, new found feeling.

The feeling that someone else was near me.