Dear Gravity You've Held Me Down

My head was pounding and my stomach felt empty and full at the same time. I wanted to throw up and go back to sleep but there was no chance of that. I opened my eyes and immediately felt relieved that it was dark. I groaned as I sat up, I lowered my head between my knees and tried to make the pain go away.

I stood up from the bed and stumbled a bit, maybe I was still drunk or I had just drank more than usual. I opened my bedroom door and closed my eyes a bit meeting some light.
The last thing I remembered was crying in the middle of the sidewalk and now I was here in my apartment, maybe I had walked here or-

"Hey you're awake." I heard someone shout.

"Don't scream." I whined as I looked at William, thinking why he was still here.

"Sorry, how are you feeling?"

"Horrible especially seeing your face." I grumbled and walked in the bathroom of the hall.

I leaned towards the toilet and emptied out more alcohol.

"Jenn!" I heard Megz shriek as she bang against the door.

I groaned in pain and sat down on the floor resting my head against the wall and closed my eyes.

"Please don't shout and scream, my head is killing me." I complained.

"Sorry." I heard Megz mumble and then heard footsteps walking.

I sighed and took deep breaths, I hated having a hung over.

About an hour later I walked out of the bathroom feeling a bit better and made my way towards the living room where Megz and William were watching TV.

"Hey." I smiled sadly at them, I felt horrible for the way I had treated William and for making Megz worry.

"I'm sorry for things Ive done and said." I told them in a low voice and then walked back to my room.

"Hey Jenn." I heard Megz voice.

I turned back around. "Yeah?" I asked her.

"I'm sorry too, I know I've been spending a lot of time with William, but you're my best friend."
I smiled at her. "I was just a bit jealous that you had somebody and I didn't" I mumbled the last part.

"You'll find someone." I heard William say.

"Thanks, It was just a change you know, and I didn't want the change, I know it's selfish of me but changes are really hard for me."

"I know, I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry too."

Meghan walked towards me and gave me a big hug. "You should go rest some more rest, I don't want Patrick to come and see you like this"

"Why isn't he here?" I asked a bit surprise.

"We didn't want to tell him, we know he was just going to flip." William said as he stood up from the couch.

"Thank God, he would have killed me." I spoke a bit scared, I would have been in a lot of trouble if he had come.

"Thanks, you guys aren't going to tell him about all... this right?"

"Don't worry we aren't"

I sighed relieved. "Thanks." I nodded and walked to my room, I closed the door and made sure to lock it.

I walked to my night stand and opened the drawer where inside prescribed pills where. I took in a deep breath and picked them up and stared at them.

I didn't want to be this person any longer, I didn't want to be the alcoholic girl with the pill addiction. I tossed the containers and laid on my bed, my life was going to change for the better.

I smiled and slowly I drifted into a sleep.