Fake My Smile

“I’ll go and phone everyone okay?” Brian whispered against the top of my head.

I silently nodded, tilting my head back as he ducked his head down in order to press his lips to mine.

“Don’t call Zacky,” I pleaded quietly.

Brian’ brow furrowed and he shook his head. “He needs to know.”

I looked at Rosie before looking at Brian as he crouched beside me. I bit my lip and sighed.

“I don’t want him here,” I told Brian.

Brian nodded and tucked some of my hair behind my ear. He leant forward and pressed his lips to mine softly before standing up.

“I’ll be back in a few.”

I nodded and watched him leave the room before looking back at Rosie. I chewed my lip as a few more tears fell down my cheeks. I had watched so many people stare at loved ones who were in this kind of position and I always counted myself lucky for never being in this kind of situation. Seeing the way their hearts broke as complications arose made my veins run dry. But I’d always pushed my emotions aside and concentrated on my job, not wanting to give the families and friends of my patients any more reason to cry.

But this time I wasn’t in the background. This time I wasn’t on shift, doing what I could for others. This time I was right there in the thick of it, sitting and waiting. I couldn’t do anything. She wasn’t my patient. I just had to wait. Wait for her to either wake up or...

It didn’t bear thinking about the ‘what if’. I couldn’t think about what might happen if complications did arise, if Rosie didn’t make it through the night.

I sniffed and closed my eyes, feeling lips on the side of my head a moment later. I opened my eyes and stood up as Brian held his arms open for me.

“I feel so useless,” I muttered against his chest.

“Me too,” he admitted before making me look at him. “Hayley wants to talk to you.”

My brow furrowed before nodding and going to the nurses desk where the phone was. One of the nurse’s smiled softly at me and I sent a weak one back before picking the phone up.

“Hayley?”

I was met with a sniff before Hayley began talking.

“How is she?”

“She’s stable,” I replied. “For now. She needs to get through the night first and there are...”

“But she’s okay.”

My brow furrowed. “For now yes but anything could...”

“Just...tell me if anything happens.”

I was then met with the dialling tone. I chewed my lip and put the phone down before going back to Rosie’s room.

“What did Hayley want?” Brian asked.

I shrugged and walked over to him, sitting down on his lap and letting him pull me close to his body.

“She asked me how Rosie was and told me to phone her if anything happens then she hung up,” I explained quietly, a tear falling down my cheek as I looked over at my best friend. “I don’t think she’s going to come.”

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I stared at my friend as she lay against the hospital bed, completely ignorant to what was going on right now. I wanted to scream at her for putting me through this but I couldn’t. I needed to know if she meant to overdose or if it was a mistake. I needed to know exactly what was going on through Rosie’s mind.

I bit my lip and wrapped my arms around myself before walking out of her room, quietly closing the door and then going through to the waiting room where I knew Brian would be with everyone else as he explained what the doctor had told us. I looked up as I got to them, noticing how Hayley wasn’t here, and was instantly engulfed by my brother.

“How is she?”

I shrugged as he let go, his hazel eyes full of concern as he looked down at me.

“She just needs to get through the...” I trailed off as my gaze landed on the one person who I couldn’t actually believe was here. “What the hell are you doing here?”

Everyone looked at me before looking over at Zacky as he looked at me somewhat affronted. He looked at Brian, but he simply held his hands up. Brian knew not to get in the way of me here because I was damned if I was going to let Zacky hurt Rosie anymore than he already had.

“Get out Zacky. You’re not welcome here.”

Zacky’s jaw practically dropped as those words came out of my mouth but I didn’t care. All I cared about was keeping him away from my friend. And when I realised that Zacky wasn’t moving I walked over to him and grabbed his arm, dragging him out of the hospital with me not caring about the looks that the rest of our friends were giving me.

“Lyndsey, let me fucking go.”

“No,” I ground out until we were outside. “Now I’ll let you go.”

I pushed him away from me and went to walk back inside but stopped as he called something out.

“What the hell have I done?”

I turned and looked at him, my glare steady as I tried to keep myself calm but I knew I wouldn’t be able to.

“I don’t know Zacky? What have you done?”

“I don’t fucking know!” He shouted at me. “All I want to do is see my fucking best friend...”

“It’s because of you she’s fucking in there!” I screamed back at him, stepping towards him and wanting nothing more than to grab him by the neck and squeeze. “It’s because of you that I might lose my best friend and I’ll be damned if I let you anywhere near her.”

“How the hell is it my fault?”

I shrugged, my glare steady on him. “You tell me. I don’t know what happened earlier today but I’ve seen Hayley today and she was fucking distraught. And it seems too much of a coincidence that Rosie is now in hospital having overdosed. Hayley won’t even come and visit her. So something has happened and it has to do with all three of you because those girls have never ever fought before, over anything.”

Zacky’s mouth opened and closed and I knew I was right. I knew that he had done something to upset the twins. I shook my head and looked at him in disdain.

“You stay the hell away from Rosie, Zack. Or I swear to God I’ll make your life miserable.”

I didn’t let him respond, instead I turned and walked back into the hospital going straight to the nurses’ desk.

“You okay sweetie?” One of the other nurses asked me.

I shook my head and nodded to the door. “Did you see the guy I went out with just then?”

The nurse let her gaze flicker to the doors before she nodded and looked back at me.

“He’s not allowed to see Rosie. Can you please make sure he doesn’t?”

Her brow furrowed but she nodded, making a note of it and sticking it on one of the boards all the nurses look at for new information on things.

“Thank you,” I commented before going back to all our friends, each of them giving me a confused look as to why I just threw Zacky out and then banned him.

“What happened baby?” Brian asked me as he pulled me to him.

I sank into my husband’s arms and felt tears begin to fall down my cheeks again.

“I was right,” I told him, looking up into his dark eyes. “He’s why she’s in here.”

“What?” Jimmy barked.

I shook my head and whimpered quietly as I wrapped my arms around Brian.

“Did he say that?”

“No,” I sighed and looked up at Brian again. “But he might as well have. I confronted him. Asked him what happened but he wouldn’t say. And I told him that it had to have something to do with him because Hayley’s distraught...Rosie’s...Rosie,” I shook my head and trailed off. “It’s too much of a fucking coincidence and Hayley won’t even come and visit her twin.”

“She’s not coming?” Sarah asked.

I looked over at her and shook my head. “Can you guys all make sure he doesn’t come and see her please?”

They all nodded and I didn’t miss the dark looks that passed between all the guys. I closed my eyes and buried my head against Brian’s chest, feeling his arms tighten around me. I prayed that Rosie would make it through the night. I needed her to.