Fake My Smile

“Come on Rosie!”

I groaned as I heard Lyndsey shout through my apartment. All I really wanted to do tonight was go to bed but Lyndsey evidently had other ideas for me. I remained where I was, curled up on my bed and under the covers hoping that if I ignored her that she would leave me alone. I had, obviously, forgotten who I was dealing with. I growled as my covers were ripped away from me and I opened my eyes to glare at Lyndsey.

“Oops,” she giggled as she dropped my covers to the floor. “How did that happen?”

I rolled my eyes and pushed my head down onto my pillow, opening my eyes as I felt Lyndsey crawl onto my bed.

“What Lyndsey?” I asked, running a hand through my still wet hair after the bath I’d just had.

“Why are you moping?”

“I should be allowed to mope.”

Lyndsey shook her head. “Nope. Come on. We are getting you out of this bed and out of those clothes.”

I looked at her as if she was insane before looking over to my bedroom door when I heard someone snort with laughter.

“If you two are gonna do that shit then I totally support you,” Brian chuckled, a smirk firmly on his lips. “But shouldn’t it be ‘get you out of those clothes and onto this bed’?”

Lyndsey looked confused for a moment before her face scrunched up.

“I didn’t mean it like that,” she whined.

“Ignore your husband,” I patted her on the head. “He’s just being a pervert.”

Lyndsey flapped her hand about, smiling slyly slightly. “I always ignore him.”

I looked over at Brian who was pouting.

“It hurts ‘cause it’s true,” he whimpered before walking over to my bed and falling face first on the bottom of it.

I rolled my eyes and curled up on my side once more, pawing about on the floor beside where I was and smiling to myself when I found my blanket. I brought it up and over me, tucking it tightly around me so it couldn’t be stolen.

“Rosie,” Lyndsey whined as she started to poke me. “We’re just going out for dinner. Please?”

I pulled the covers from over my head and looked at her.

“Will you stop whining if I go?”

Lyndsey grinned and nodded.

“Fine,” I relented, kicking off my blankets so I could get up to get changed and accidently kicking Brian off my bed. “Oops, my bad.”

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“I still don’t see why we had to have this dinner,” I muttered as I sat beside Jimmy who laughed slightly.

“Its tradition,” he commented as he wrapped his arm around my shoulders.

I rolled my eyes. “It’s a shitty tradition if we are all going on the damn tour.”

“We’re not all going on the tour,” Jimmy pointed out. “Hayley’s staying and Lyndsey’s staying...”

“Something I’m still not happy about,” she pouted from the other side of me. “Fucking work gets in the way of everything.”

“My point is,” Jimmy finished. “Is that we’re not going to see half of our group for four months. We should be allowed to have one last fun night before we head off.”

I sighed and crossed my arms over my chest. “Fine.”

“What’s up Zee?”

I tilted my head back as I felt hands on my shoulders and saw Zacky smiling down at me. I forced myself to smile back before I shrugged.

“Just woke up in a bad mood I guess.”

Lyndsey caught my gaze and I knew by the look she sent me that she knew I was lying. I gave her a look back and she sighed before turning her attention to Brian. I looked back up at Zacky to see him eyeing me carefully.

“You sure that’s it?”

I nodded and smiled. “Honestly.”

Zacky smiled and ducked down, pressing his lips to the side of my head before patting my shoulders gently.

“I don’t like seeing you down.”

“I know,” I replied before watching as he left my side and walked around the table to sit beside his girlfriend of ten years.

I smiled over at Hayley as she grinned at me before she turned her attention to Zacky as he leant closer to her and pressed his lips to hers. I inwardly cringed before looking down at the menu in front of me, wondering what I wanted for my dessert since we’d already had our main courses.

“What you going to have?” Lyndsey asked.

“Waffles!” Was suddenly squealed from the other side of the table and I laughed as JB tried to calm down Sarah. “But baby, they have waffles.”

I turned my attention back to Lyndsey and shrugged. “Not sure yet. I feel the need to have something fattening that will sit on my thighs and hips until I die.”

“Amen to that!” Lyndsey laughed before looking down at the menu with me. “Ooo that looks sickening. Let’s have that!”

I looked at what she was pointing at and saw a picture of a big slice of sticky chocolate fudge cake.

“You want to share it?” She asked.

I nodded. “I’m game if you are.”

“Always,” she chuckled.

I smiled and looked down at the menu, noticing that you can get the cake with cream.

“Dude, we have to get it with cream,” Lyndsey and I both said at the same time.

“What you having Rosie?”

I looked over at Hayley and grinned. “I am having the chocolate fudge cake with cream, but I’m gonna share it with Lyndsey ‘cause one to myself may actually give me a heart attack on the spot. What about you?”

“I’m having it too,” she smiled and then shrugged. “Except I’m having it all to myself.”

“That my dear is because you are the fat twin.”

Hayley fake gasped and placed a hand over her heart. “That hurt Rosie. It cut me deep.”

I stuck my tongue out at her before laughing as she pulled a stupid face at me. We may now be almost twenty-eight but some things never change between Hayley and I. We were both still as immature as we were when we were younger.

A waiter came over and everyone rattled off their desserts, Lyndsey doing the honours for our dessert. I looked over at Zacky and noticed that he was fidgeting slightly. My brow furrowed and I managed to catch his gaze.

“You okay?” I mouthed.

He sent me a smile and nodded but I could tell that his smile was wavering slightly.

“What’s up?” I mouthed.

“I’m fine,” he mouthed back, smiling once more and this time his smile was stronger.

I nodded though I still wanted to know why he was fidgeting so much.

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“This is diabetes on a plate,” Lyndsey commented as we struggled to finish our dessert. “How the hell are you eating this by yourself Hayley?”

I laughed as I looked over at my sister who simply grinned.

“I’ve already told you people this,” I pointed out. “Hayley is the fat twin.”

“Watch it,” Hayley warned me.

“Ah, what you gonna do?”

Hayley flapped a hand about. “I’m sure I’ll think of something.”

I rolled my eyes before digging in to the last of the cake, indulging in idle chat with Jimmy, Lyndsey and Brian as we ate. I looked up as I heard Hayley squeal slightly and looked up just in time to see her fling her arms around Zacky.

“Anyone else confused?” Johnny asked.

“Me!” Raychel piped up with as she peered over at Zacky and my sister.

I had to admit that I too was somewhat confused but my eyes soon landed on the ring that never used to sit on her finger on her left hand and I felt my heart sink to the bottom of my stomach.

“I’m going to be Mrs. Baker!” Hayley suddenly shrieked and our whole table erupted into cheers.

I half-heartedly joined in before standing up as Hayley ran round the table to me.

“I’m so happy for you,” I told her as she hugged me tightly.

“Thank you,” she whispered back before pulling away from me and going over to hug herboyfriend fiancé.

I sank back down on to my chair and glanced over at Lyndsey who was eyeing me up. She sidled up closer to me and wrapped an arm around me.

“You okay?”

I nodded and smiled. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?”

Lyndsey gave me yet another pointed look. She knew, she’d always known. But I think that she thought at some point I’d gotten over it. I hadn’t and she knew by the way I reacted to the news of the engagement. I was happy for the both of them but that was hidden by the depression that clouded the event. But it was okay, because I’d been faking my happiness for ten years now. What’s the rest of my life?