When Forever Ends

I don’t know how I managed to last a month without her. I really don’t. I’m sort of going crazy. I mean...I have Alice. But, she was never meant to be like permanent. I only went to the stupidass party with her in hopes of making Shayne jealous. A lot of fucking good that did me. If anything inviting Alice was the biggest mistake. She entirely destroyed my friendship with Shayne.

Okay, well it was kind of my fault...it was more of Shayne’s fault. She shouldn’t have kept something like that from everyone. I regret the way I reacted though. I haven’t seen or spoke to her in over two months. I shouldn’t have made such a big deal out of it. I should have just accepted it...because now I miss her...a whole fucking lot.

“Come on, Ford.” I call into the livingroom. “We’re going to their apartment.” there was no other way to contact them. Trust me, I try to call Shayne daily but I get the robot telling I’ve reached her voice mail.

“Now?” he asks, his panicky nervousness is clear in his voice. I think I’m doing a pretty good job hiding mine.

“Yeah.” I say picking up the keys to the car I’m leasing. I don’t even know what to say to her. I’m sorry...but if I were Shayne, I wouldn’t forgive me. If I were Marley, I sure as fuck would not forgive Ford.

I think Vince is going to pass out from nerves when I knock on Marley’s door. There is no answer for a while. Then the door opens and some hairy old guy in a bath robe answers.

“Can I help you?” he asks. Yeah, put some clothes on.

“Um, is Shayne here?” I ask unsurely.

“No. I think you have the wrong apartment.” he starts to close the door.

“Did they switch apartments. Shayne’s a really short girl...tan...kind of dresses like a hobo. Or Marley...long blonde hair that reaches just above her butt...really pregnant.”

“No. I don’t know. I haven’t seen anyone who matches those descriptions. Sorry.” and with the old guy shuffles back inside and slams the door.

“We’ll just check the office.” I say to Vince and walk off in the direction of the office.

I wait at the desk until an Asian man barks “What you want?”

“Umm, Marley Donahue...does she live here anymore?” I ask sort scared of the vicious little man.

“No! She move!”

“Do you know where she moved to?” Vince asks.

“Ehh...New York. Goodbye.” and with that the little bastard shooed us out of the office.

“New York? New York! They moved to fucking New York?” I start spazzing once we reach the parking lot. That’s on the other side of the fucking country! I need to see her! I’m going crazy without her.

“Maybe Marley just moved.” Vince says.

“You don’t understand, do you Ford? Where Marley goes, Shayne goes! They fucking depend on each other! One can’t move to New York without the other.”

“Okay, well maybe that guy was wrong! Maybe they’re still around here. I bet that Milo go would know. Just go find him.” Vince suggests. Not a bad idea. I drive to his dirty apartment complex pretty much run to the door.

“Hey, if you’re looking for Milo...don’t even bother. He moved to New York.” a trashy looking blonde tells me walking out of the building.

“New York?” I almost scream.

“Yeah, tell me about it. I hate finding new dealers.”

“We have to go to New York.” Vince tells me flatly after we sit in my car for an hour in silence.

“We can’t go to New York! We don’t know where the fuck in New York they are! If they’re in New York City we’re fucking screwed. We’re never going to find them.”

“Dude, I can’t do this! I fucked up so bad! I need to fucking find her and make everything okay!” Vince slaps his hand against the dashboard angrily.

A year goes by and honestly think Vince wants to shoot himself. He looks more depressed than anyone I’ve ever seen. He’s pretty regretful on the whole subject of saying what he said. I regret everything I said...even it’s true. I hope it’s not true, but I know most of it is true.

“Oh my fucking Buddha!” Jake screams one afternoon. “ACE!” I basically throw Alice off me and run to the living room with no shirt on and my jeans half undone. “Look at this!” Jake points to the televison.

“Former unknown West Coast skater, Shayne Lewis, hits it big this weekend at demo in New York City!” the host of some skate show says. “Not only can she skate, but she is hot!” the guy says.

His co-host chimes in “Hot Mama that is. Shayne has most recently been seen with her six year old son, Gavin, at a local Chuck E Cheese. That’s where I had the chance to meet Miss Lewis and Gavin and was able to have a nice interview with them. When I asked Shayne about why she left the former group she skated with consisting of Ace Bennett, Jake Cooper, Corey Jones, Zack Masters, and Derek Shultz; Shayne replied ‘We had our differences. We had different priorities.’ Now, I asked Shayne if she had anything to say to her former skating companions and she replied ‘I hope you’re happy and I hope you’re all doing well.’ Wow, hot and sweet. What a combination!”

“I think I’m in love.” the other guy says. I feel a pit of jealousy in my stomach.

“Gavin is celebrating his seventh birthday this Saturday. When we asked Gavin what his plans are he said ‘Skating with my mom.’ He’s going to be one awesome kid. Anyway,” I stop listening and Jake and I both stare at each other in awe that Shayne actually made it on television.

“That’s fucking crazy.” Jake blurts out. I waste no time in looking up Shayne on the internet. If I knew so many things about her would show up I would have done this months ago.

One picture catches my attention. I stare at it for a long time. It doesn’t even look like Shayne. Her hair is in loose natural curls, she’s wearing these huge black sunglasses, black skinny jeans, and white gauzy looking top. Here phone is to her ear and her son his holding onto her hand tightly as they cross the street. He’s a cute kid. He looks just like her...with black hair.

My stomach does flips and ties it’s self in knots the whole time I look at the picture. It’s nothing compared to the way my hearts starts to beat like mad. “Is this why you threw me? So you can look at some model and her kid?” Alice asks.

“It’s Shayne.” I say automatically. Alice starts to laugh. I don’t see what’s funny. “Hah, that’s one ugly kid.” Alice walks away. I don’t follow. I continue to read about Shayne. She’s got quite the fan base.

“Come on, Ace! I want to go shopping.” Alice calls. With my money. She want so go shopping with my money. I don’t even have that much money, and she wants me to spend it on her. She knows I will, that’s the problem.

“Umm, actually. I was thinking we should go to New York.” I say.

“New York?” She asks excitedly.

“Yeah, New York.” I answer. “Me, you, Jake, Vince.”

“Oh. They’re going.”

“Yep.” I say doing my best to ignore the way she refers to my friends as ‘them’.

So...I set up the whole thing. We’re going to New York. I’m going to find Shayne. I’m going to tell her I’m sorry. I’m going to kiss her. I’m going to tell her I am hopelessly in love with her. Then we’re going to live happily ever after. Vince is going to find Marley. He’s going to apologize. He’s going to kiss her. He’s going to hold the baby that could or could not be his. Then they’re going to live happily ever after. And Alice, well...if things don’t go according to plan, I still have Alice.