When Forever Ends

Almost the whole week passed since Marley officially became Marley Ford. She and her husband where off in fucking Italy doing who the hell even cares what. I don’t.

The only thing I care about right now is trying to shove my way through people so I can actually make it to my doctor’s appointment on time.

“We shouldn’t have driven! It would have been faster if we walked!” Nate says from my side.

“Shut up, Nate.” I growl. I’m not in the best of moods today. It seems like the bump in my stomach was much more noticeable today more than ever. Which sucks because today I have to face Ace. I don’t actually have to...but I’ve been thinking that I should.

I was here to find out the sex of my baby. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to find out really, if I was carrying a girl I would be in a bad mood for the rest of this fucking pregnancy. It’s not like I would love the baby less if it did happen to be a girl. I would just be...unprepared. Plus, I don’t like any girl’s names. I made this list on a piece of notebook paper I took from Gavin’s Math notebook. I drew a line down the center I wrote ‘BOYS’ on the top right and ‘GIRLS’ on the top left. I have the whole Boy’s side filled with names. Only one thing is written under ‘GIRLS’ and that one thing would be the word fuck. I couldn’t very well name a kid that...it’s probably not even legal.

The ultra sound technician put a whole shit load of the cold jell type stuff on my stomach and moved the little thing that looked like a futuristic device of torture on my stomach and began to move it around. I watched the screen with interest. Then there my baby was...sucking it’s thumb.

“Aww!” Nate squealed from his chair beside me.

“You’re so gay.” I laughed at him.

“Obviously.” he said laughing at himself.

“Would you like to know the gender?” the technician asks looked over at Nate and I. I bit my lip, but nodded my head up and down.

“Looks like you’re going to be having a boy, Miss Lewis.” she smiled at me. Oh fuck yes! I won’t have to name my kid Fuck now. This is great! Gavin is going to be so happy.

I grin the whole way back to Nate and Milo’s apartment. “It’s a boy!” I scream as soon as I walk through the door. Milo runs from the hallway and hugs me. He knew I wanted a boy.

“Congratulations! But I think you have something to now.” Milo says clearing his throat and motion towards the door with his head.

“Fine.” I snap and head outside. The drive to the hotel isn’t silent. I’m listen to music rather loudly. I’m just trying to block out all thoughts of what I’m about to do. I feel like I need to puke and I’m tempted to pull over and turn around. However, getting halfway to the hotel and chickening out won’t be near enough to stop Marley from calling him and telling him.

I park and take a few deep breaths before I get out of the car. I fucking can’t believe I’m actually about to do this.

“He’s out there.” Jake pointed me to a side door off the lobby.

“Thanks.” I smile weakly at Jake. I push the heavy glass door open and look around the vacant back parking lot of the hotel. A place meant for trucks to drop off supplies. I spot Ace laying on his back staring up at the sky. Raindrops started to fall very slowly from the darkening sky, the gray was the exact shade of Gavin’s eyes.

I watch curiously as Ace lifts himself off the ground and stands with his back towards me. Then as if he was trying to fight off some invisible attacker he threw his skateboard viciously across the vacant lot. I jump slightly at the sound of his board hitting the side of the hotel and watch as it breaks clean in half. Like someone announced my arrival, Ace spun around and blinked at me with an expressionless face as I walked over to him. I don’t think I was ever as nervous as I am now, my legs are shaking along with my hands.

“Hi.” was all that manages to fall out of my mouth.

“Hi.” Ace says back pushing his hands through his mess of shaggy brown hair. Then we stood about ten feet away from each other, looking anywhere but each other. It was awkward to say the least. “Not to be rude, but what are you doing here?” Aces voice has a bitting edge to it.

I sigh and look to him, staring at his nose instead of his eyes. “I need to tell you three things.” I scratch the back of my neck. “Warnings. One, I don’t expect you to care. Two, I’m not asking anything of you. Three, I know I’m too late.” Ace cocks his head to the side which just lets me know that he’s waiting for me to speak again. “I’m pregnant. It’s your’s. I love you.” I say looking directly into his golden brown eyes.

“Okay.” he responds. Okay? I felt tears prick my eyes. That’s all? I knew there was no point in tell him. He doesn’t care, he doesn’t feel the same way as he used to. I ruined it, he moved on. Not only did he reject me but he rejected our baby. Our son, and that hurt more than any broken bone I’ve ever had, it hurt worse than childbirth. That hurts a real fucking lot.

I refuse to blink and let him see me cry. So I walk back through the lobby, ignoring Jake’s chattering from behind me. I run to my car and speed away.

Marley was wrong. He’s not happy. She said he would be happy...and he’s not. He’s indifferent