Born for This
Chapter Seven: Superman
Chapter Seven: Superman
xXFrankie’s POVXx
I woke up to darkness, and a sharp pain shooting through the back of my neck. I blinked a couple of times, trying to figure out where I was located, only to see trees, trees, and more trees. I sighed, and leaned back in the tree. My eyes slipped closed again.
Then it hit me. The reason I was here. As I thought of that reason, I started to choke on my own sobs, and pieces of the broken bits of heart that remained. I was losing my other half, my soul, my conscience. It just wasn’t going to be the same anymore, was it?
I suppose not. Shayne’s gone, like the wind. There’s no one left to comfort me, and no one to come help me now that I’m lost.
Lost? Am I really? I looked around again. With all of the thoughts rushing through with the morning adrenaline, my head wasn’t on quite straight. I couldn’t tell where I came from, or where I was going to. Which way was home, left or right? Was I in new territory?
Well, the only way to find out was to get up and look. I clutched the sharp bark of the tree beside me. It appeared to be my only support system at the moment, and the only thing that kept me from falling. But like every other thing in my life, it hurt me. The bark scratched up my white knuckles, making them bleed. But I didn’t care. I wanted to get somewhere. Anywhere but here.
I trotted through the forest for a while, scared that something would get me. I felt like a little girl again, afraid of the monster jumping out of my closet, or grabbing me by the ankles and dragging me under the bed. Who’s afraid of the big bad wolf? I sure as hell am!
At one point, I reached a clearing, which was a little brighter than the woods, but not by much. It was still pretty dark out, for there were no lights. Only an old steel and wood bench, and a decrepit old church. Of course, I had to stumble here, of all places.
I walked over to the cliff edge, looking down. My shoes nudged a rock over, making it bounce against the rocks, until it was out of sight, and most likely splattered on the ground. I got a little too close to the edge, and debated throwing myself over. What was the point of staying here? I had no one.
I was about to step my foot off of the normal surface and over the cliff when I realized something. It was night, and I had missed curfew. Mom would be worried sick, and if she found her daughter in that comprisable condition, she would break down. Losing a child was a horrible thing, but having to worry if your child was coming home or not was worse. I couldn’t do this now. Another time, another day, if I feel the need. I walked back to the woods, and kept repeating:
Dying is a last resort.
Dying is a last resort.
Eventually, I reached my house. No lights were on, and I wondered if anyone was inside. Were they looking for me, or had they just fallen asleep, assuming I was sleeping over at Shayne’s? Had mom stayed up? Had dad? Did Zach give a shit that his sister was missing, or was he already moving into my old room?
I stepped onto the patio and pulled off my shoes, not wanting to make a noise. As I opened the door, I tiptoed in, gritting my teeth and not daring to breath. I made it halfway up the stairwell when the lights flicked on. “Hello Frankie...” I heard mom say. I froze, and after several seconds, turned back to face her.
Her face was a little tanner than mine, but seemed pale with worry. She had shadows under her lids, from lack of sleep. She glared at me with her hollow hazels that matched mine.
“Hi mom,” I stated, trying to seem casual. It was useless. She could smell the fear in my voice. I was trapped.
“Do you know what time it is?” she asked me. I stopped and pulled out my phone. It was dead. I looked at the microwave clock. The neon read 3:45. Sheeeaaaaaattttt!
“It’s almost four,” I mumbled. She glared at me for a moment, then sighed angrily. Great. She’s not worried, just pissed. She took a breath and murmured something in another language. Italian. Uh oh. She’s maaadd!
“Che cosa la scopata era voi che fate così in ritardo fuori?!,” she started angrily, in her shrill accent she got from her mother. I inched back, afraid she would come at me and smack me. Not like that hadn’t happened before. “Avete avuti tutta l'idea che eravamo MALATO preoccupato circa voi?! Livellate la cura Franchesca Sophia?”
I looked down ashamed. “ Facciali?!?!” she screeched. I gulped back tears. She didn’t understand. She wouldn’t understand. It was impossible for her to believe. Besides, I won’t use Shayne as an excuse. That’s not right.
But even with all of my strength, my voice was still cracking, with tears in my eyes, “I do understand!!” I told her, “I do appreciate you!!”
“Mi non usi quel tono con missy!,” she scolded. Quite loudly, I may add. Thank God Zach is a sound sleeper. I’d never hear the end of it. “Li ho prodotti nell'interesse del Christ! Dovreste essere scopare riconoscente, ma siete? Nooo!”
She breathed out heavily. I hid behind my bangs, trying to hide the tears sliding down my face. I couldn’t hold it in. I choked out a small, “I’m sorry.” before I let out the sob that had built up inside of me. I shook with tears for a while.
“Frankie,” mom cooed, ”Sweetheart, what’s wrong? What happened?”
“N-Nothing!” I lied. I didn’t want her pity. “Just... leave me alone right now, okay?”
“Honey,” she started,” Was it because of me? I didn’t want to make you cry. I was just scared you were hurt, that’s all-”
“I KNOW,” I replied bluntly. I stood up straight, not hiding my mascara smeared face anymore. “I don’t want to talk about it right now. I don’t want to bother you with my personal life. Just... leave me be.” I turned to go back up the stairs. I mumbled, “Sorry I came in late. I got caught up in something. But hey, I’m no superman.”
And with that, I ran up the stairs, still in tears.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The next few days were rough. Mom and I didn’t talk much, after what had happened that fateful Saturday night. Or, Sunday morning. Whichever way you pick. Zach was clueless to what happened, and Dad had calmed mom down after she got upset about seeing her daughter so hurt. He said that from what he heard from her, it was the most I’d cried since I was a baby.
The days ticked by slowly in a black and white blur. Shayne had been the color in my life, but without her, there was nothing else. Just life, standing there, staring me in the face. No one to push it away, or tell it jokes and make life a little more happy. it was just... life.
Croissant had found out later that Shayne was leaving, and they were all going to see her off that morning. I couldn’t dare move. It would just be too much to see the van pull out and Rio driving her crappy 1977 Volts Wagon out of the lot, and a tear stained heart shaped face waving goodbye. It would break my heart.
As much as everyone begged and pleaded, I wouldn’t budge. Not until the morning of. Then, it hit me. I might never see Shayne again. It was my last chance to see her, and I didn’t want my last vision of her to be a worried face, pleading for me to stay with her.
Before I even knew it, my legs were moving. My shoes seemed to slip on, almost magically, and I was bolting out the door. I forgot the shortcut for minutes, maybe hours, and just sprinted down the back road. It took maybe fifteen minutes to reach the thirty minute mile away house.
But by the time I got there, it was too late. Shayne was already gone.....
I fell down to the road, and cried......
xXFrankie’s POVXx
I woke up to darkness, and a sharp pain shooting through the back of my neck. I blinked a couple of times, trying to figure out where I was located, only to see trees, trees, and more trees. I sighed, and leaned back in the tree. My eyes slipped closed again.
Then it hit me. The reason I was here. As I thought of that reason, I started to choke on my own sobs, and pieces of the broken bits of heart that remained. I was losing my other half, my soul, my conscience. It just wasn’t going to be the same anymore, was it?
I suppose not. Shayne’s gone, like the wind. There’s no one left to comfort me, and no one to come help me now that I’m lost.
Lost? Am I really? I looked around again. With all of the thoughts rushing through with the morning adrenaline, my head wasn’t on quite straight. I couldn’t tell where I came from, or where I was going to. Which way was home, left or right? Was I in new territory?
Well, the only way to find out was to get up and look. I clutched the sharp bark of the tree beside me. It appeared to be my only support system at the moment, and the only thing that kept me from falling. But like every other thing in my life, it hurt me. The bark scratched up my white knuckles, making them bleed. But I didn’t care. I wanted to get somewhere. Anywhere but here.
I trotted through the forest for a while, scared that something would get me. I felt like a little girl again, afraid of the monster jumping out of my closet, or grabbing me by the ankles and dragging me under the bed. Who’s afraid of the big bad wolf? I sure as hell am!
At one point, I reached a clearing, which was a little brighter than the woods, but not by much. It was still pretty dark out, for there were no lights. Only an old steel and wood bench, and a decrepit old church. Of course, I had to stumble here, of all places.
I walked over to the cliff edge, looking down. My shoes nudged a rock over, making it bounce against the rocks, until it was out of sight, and most likely splattered on the ground. I got a little too close to the edge, and debated throwing myself over. What was the point of staying here? I had no one.
I was about to step my foot off of the normal surface and over the cliff when I realized something. It was night, and I had missed curfew. Mom would be worried sick, and if she found her daughter in that comprisable condition, she would break down. Losing a child was a horrible thing, but having to worry if your child was coming home or not was worse. I couldn’t do this now. Another time, another day, if I feel the need. I walked back to the woods, and kept repeating:
Dying is a last resort.
Dying is a last resort.
Eventually, I reached my house. No lights were on, and I wondered if anyone was inside. Were they looking for me, or had they just fallen asleep, assuming I was sleeping over at Shayne’s? Had mom stayed up? Had dad? Did Zach give a shit that his sister was missing, or was he already moving into my old room?
I stepped onto the patio and pulled off my shoes, not wanting to make a noise. As I opened the door, I tiptoed in, gritting my teeth and not daring to breath. I made it halfway up the stairwell when the lights flicked on. “Hello Frankie...” I heard mom say. I froze, and after several seconds, turned back to face her.
Her face was a little tanner than mine, but seemed pale with worry. She had shadows under her lids, from lack of sleep. She glared at me with her hollow hazels that matched mine.
“Hi mom,” I stated, trying to seem casual. It was useless. She could smell the fear in my voice. I was trapped.
“Do you know what time it is?” she asked me. I stopped and pulled out my phone. It was dead. I looked at the microwave clock. The neon read 3:45. Sheeeaaaaaattttt!
“It’s almost four,” I mumbled. She glared at me for a moment, then sighed angrily. Great. She’s not worried, just pissed. She took a breath and murmured something in another language. Italian. Uh oh. She’s maaadd!
“Che cosa la scopata era voi che fate così in ritardo fuori?!,” she started angrily, in her shrill accent she got from her mother. I inched back, afraid she would come at me and smack me. Not like that hadn’t happened before. “Avete avuti tutta l'idea che eravamo MALATO preoccupato circa voi?! Livellate la cura Franchesca Sophia?”
I looked down ashamed. “ Facciali?!?!” she screeched. I gulped back tears. She didn’t understand. She wouldn’t understand. It was impossible for her to believe. Besides, I won’t use Shayne as an excuse. That’s not right.
But even with all of my strength, my voice was still cracking, with tears in my eyes, “I do understand!!” I told her, “I do appreciate you!!”
“Mi non usi quel tono con missy!,” she scolded. Quite loudly, I may add. Thank God Zach is a sound sleeper. I’d never hear the end of it. “Li ho prodotti nell'interesse del Christ! Dovreste essere scopare riconoscente, ma siete? Nooo!”
She breathed out heavily. I hid behind my bangs, trying to hide the tears sliding down my face. I couldn’t hold it in. I choked out a small, “I’m sorry.” before I let out the sob that had built up inside of me. I shook with tears for a while.
“Frankie,” mom cooed, ”Sweetheart, what’s wrong? What happened?”
“N-Nothing!” I lied. I didn’t want her pity. “Just... leave me alone right now, okay?”
“Honey,” she started,” Was it because of me? I didn’t want to make you cry. I was just scared you were hurt, that’s all-”
“I KNOW,” I replied bluntly. I stood up straight, not hiding my mascara smeared face anymore. “I don’t want to talk about it right now. I don’t want to bother you with my personal life. Just... leave me be.” I turned to go back up the stairs. I mumbled, “Sorry I came in late. I got caught up in something. But hey, I’m no superman.”
And with that, I ran up the stairs, still in tears.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The next few days were rough. Mom and I didn’t talk much, after what had happened that fateful Saturday night. Or, Sunday morning. Whichever way you pick. Zach was clueless to what happened, and Dad had calmed mom down after she got upset about seeing her daughter so hurt. He said that from what he heard from her, it was the most I’d cried since I was a baby.
The days ticked by slowly in a black and white blur. Shayne had been the color in my life, but without her, there was nothing else. Just life, standing there, staring me in the face. No one to push it away, or tell it jokes and make life a little more happy. it was just... life.
Croissant had found out later that Shayne was leaving, and they were all going to see her off that morning. I couldn’t dare move. It would just be too much to see the van pull out and Rio driving her crappy 1977 Volts Wagon out of the lot, and a tear stained heart shaped face waving goodbye. It would break my heart.
As much as everyone begged and pleaded, I wouldn’t budge. Not until the morning of. Then, it hit me. I might never see Shayne again. It was my last chance to see her, and I didn’t want my last vision of her to be a worried face, pleading for me to stay with her.
Before I even knew it, my legs were moving. My shoes seemed to slip on, almost magically, and I was bolting out the door. I forgot the shortcut for minutes, maybe hours, and just sprinted down the back road. It took maybe fifteen minutes to reach the thirty minute mile away house.
But by the time I got there, it was too late. Shayne was already gone.....
I fell down to the road, and cried......