Creating Something out of Nothing
Chapter Fourteen
Everyday for the next week, Zacky came over to spend time with Ryan. And whenever Ryan would ask to stay the night with him, Zacky would gently tell him 'no,' saying that his home wasn't ready for Ryan. But I figured Zacky had a girlfriend living with him or something. That was fine with me on the surface, but it affected Ryan's feelings. So I decided to call him out on it.
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ZACKY'S POV
I can't believe this! It took me a year to make myself get over Tammy and now she's here! Back here! With my son! When I saw her in the store, all the feelings came rushing back. I remembered the first time we got together, I remembered her telling me how she felt, I remembered finding out she was leaving, I even remembered loving her but not saying a word.
I'm not going to make the same mistake twice, though. I'm gonna tell Tammy how I feel before she goes back to wherever she lives. I can't let her go without telling her how I feel. I just don't know what to say to Maddie.
END ZACKY'S POV
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"Zacky, can I talk to you for a minute?" I asked from the doorway of the living room. He was watching Blue's Clues with Ryan on the couch. Zacky looked up at me and nodded.
He kissed Ryan's forehead and whispered something to him before getting up and following me into the kitchen. We stood on opposite sides of the island.
"What's up?" he asked me.
"I just wanted to say that I really appreciate you coming to spend time with Ryan. He really loves it."
Zacky nodded and shrugged. "It's no big deal. I love him, I love spending time with him."
"I know. And he loves you too. So I was wondering if you could take him with you tonight while I go see my dad."
Zacky hesitated and bit his lip. "Uh, I dunno if I can do that."
"Why not?"
"Uh...it's complicated."
I gave him a blank stare. "You have a girlfriend that lives with you and she doesn't know about Ryan, right?"
His eyes widened a little. "How'd you figure that out?"
"Oh please, Zacky," I scoffed. "You're not a brick wall, I can pretty much read you all the time."
He stepped around the island to get closer to me.
"So, what's her name?"
"Madison."
"Oh yeah? How'd you meet her?" I tried to keep the jealousy out of my voice, but I couldn't be sure if I was doing a good job.
"We kinda dated in high school, before you and I got together. We saw each other again after you left and I decided to give her another chance."
"What do you mean, another chance?"
"She broke my heart in high school. She was the reason why I wouldn't commit to you or anything. I didn't wanna put myself through that shit again."
"So why haven't you told her about Ryan?" I asked suspiciously, narrowing my eyes at him.
"Because it would probably break her heart. She wants to get married and have kids and-"
"Do you love her?"
"What?"
"Do you love her?" I repeated. I was starting to get angry and I didn't know why. Oh, I knew why: I still loved Zacky.
"Yeah, I love her."
Nice blow to the heart with that one.
"But I'm in love with you."
"What?" I looked up at him. He finally came all the way around and stood in front of me.
"I'm in love with you, Tammy. I was four years ago and I still am. I just didn't want to admit it because I didn't wanna get hurt like I had with Maddie."
I stepped back and shook my head. "You're so full of shit, Zacky! Why do you do shit like this? Why do you like when you don't need to?" He tried to speak but I cut him off by continuing. "It wouldn't matter even if did love me. When my dad's better, we're going back to Florida. You can see Ryan anytime you want, but don't try to suck me into your little games. I'm not gonna let myself be suckered like you suckered me before."
"I didn't mean-"
I held up my hand to cut him off and shook my head again. "Don't, Zacky. It doesn't matter, that was four years ago. I've gotten over it, but like you learned from Maddie, I learned from you. But you won't get a second chance from me."
After I was done, Zacky walked out of the kitchen, said bye to Ryan and left. Now I'd have to take Ryan with me to the hospital.
Fuck.
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ZACKY'S POV
I can't believe this! It took me a year to make myself get over Tammy and now she's here! Back here! With my son! When I saw her in the store, all the feelings came rushing back. I remembered the first time we got together, I remembered her telling me how she felt, I remembered finding out she was leaving, I even remembered loving her but not saying a word.
I'm not going to make the same mistake twice, though. I'm gonna tell Tammy how I feel before she goes back to wherever she lives. I can't let her go without telling her how I feel. I just don't know what to say to Maddie.
END ZACKY'S POV
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"Zacky, can I talk to you for a minute?" I asked from the doorway of the living room. He was watching Blue's Clues with Ryan on the couch. Zacky looked up at me and nodded.
He kissed Ryan's forehead and whispered something to him before getting up and following me into the kitchen. We stood on opposite sides of the island.
"What's up?" he asked me.
"I just wanted to say that I really appreciate you coming to spend time with Ryan. He really loves it."
Zacky nodded and shrugged. "It's no big deal. I love him, I love spending time with him."
"I know. And he loves you too. So I was wondering if you could take him with you tonight while I go see my dad."
Zacky hesitated and bit his lip. "Uh, I dunno if I can do that."
"Why not?"
"Uh...it's complicated."
I gave him a blank stare. "You have a girlfriend that lives with you and she doesn't know about Ryan, right?"
His eyes widened a little. "How'd you figure that out?"
"Oh please, Zacky," I scoffed. "You're not a brick wall, I can pretty much read you all the time."
He stepped around the island to get closer to me.
"So, what's her name?"
"Madison."
"Oh yeah? How'd you meet her?" I tried to keep the jealousy out of my voice, but I couldn't be sure if I was doing a good job.
"We kinda dated in high school, before you and I got together. We saw each other again after you left and I decided to give her another chance."
"What do you mean, another chance?"
"She broke my heart in high school. She was the reason why I wouldn't commit to you or anything. I didn't wanna put myself through that shit again."
"So why haven't you told her about Ryan?" I asked suspiciously, narrowing my eyes at him.
"Because it would probably break her heart. She wants to get married and have kids and-"
"Do you love her?"
"What?"
"Do you love her?" I repeated. I was starting to get angry and I didn't know why. Oh, I knew why: I still loved Zacky.
"Yeah, I love her."
Nice blow to the heart with that one.
"But I'm in love with you."
"What?" I looked up at him. He finally came all the way around and stood in front of me.
"I'm in love with you, Tammy. I was four years ago and I still am. I just didn't want to admit it because I didn't wanna get hurt like I had with Maddie."
I stepped back and shook my head. "You're so full of shit, Zacky! Why do you do shit like this? Why do you like when you don't need to?" He tried to speak but I cut him off by continuing. "It wouldn't matter even if did love me. When my dad's better, we're going back to Florida. You can see Ryan anytime you want, but don't try to suck me into your little games. I'm not gonna let myself be suckered like you suckered me before."
"I didn't mean-"
I held up my hand to cut him off and shook my head again. "Don't, Zacky. It doesn't matter, that was four years ago. I've gotten over it, but like you learned from Maddie, I learned from you. But you won't get a second chance from me."
After I was done, Zacky walked out of the kitchen, said bye to Ryan and left. Now I'd have to take Ryan with me to the hospital.
Fuck.