Creating Something out of Nothing

I woke up to Zacky's arms around me and the laughter of Matt and Ryan coming from the living room. The memories of last night rushed back to me as I sat up in the bed with Zacky's arms still possessively holding onto my waist. I smiled a little as I looked at his face.

I couldn't deny it anymore. I still loved Zacky. I just didn't want to be hurt again. So now I don't know what to do with myself.

Zacky moved around and ended up snuggling closer to my waist before opening his red eyes to look up at me.

"Morning," he said with a scratchy voice, squinting his eyes against the sunlight.

"Morning," I replied quietly.

He began to sit up and stopped to groan and put his hands to his forehead. "God, what did I drink last night?"

"Well, if my nose is right, and my taste buds are still accurate, it was definitely JD. As to why you drank so fuckin' much, I have no clue."

He chuckled then groaned again and I got up to go to the kitchen.

"Where you goin'?" he asked.

"Getting you some Alieve and cranberry juice, you dunce."

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After I'd asked Matt to take Ryan out for a while, I went back to the guest room where I'd left Zacky. As I walked in, I saw him still holding his head. When he saw me and what I was holding, he reached his arms out like a baby wanting a bottle.

"Oh, thank you, thank you," he sighed before slipping the two pills onto his tongue and chasing them with the juice. I sat down on the edge of the bed, waiting for Zacky to be done. When he was, I tried to speak, but he cut me off with his hand.

"Tammy, I know what you're gonna say. You won't let me hurt you again, blah blah blah. But you have to know that I didn't mean to hurt you at first. I was protecting myself. Or at least I tried to. But I'd already fallen for you way before that. I just wouldn't admit it to myself. Especially not after Maddie."

"Why didn't you just tell me about Maddie?"

"I didn't want anyone to know that I'd gotten my heart slam-dunked though a meat grinder. Everyone thought that we'd mutually broken up, but it's just 'cause I didn't want anyone to think less of me for getting played."

"No one would've thought less of you, Zacky. They would've thought less of her. She was the sleeze, not you. And you don't have to be ashamed that you got your heart broken. Mine got broken and I still survived."

"Then why aren't you with anyone?"

He was staring at me and I knew I couldn't lie.

"Because I didn't want anyone to be like a father for Ryan. I wanted Ryan to have his father. I've always wanted to be with you, longed and fucking ached for it. But I didn't wanna be hurt by you again. So I figured the only way I could be satisfied was alone."

"But now you don't have to be. I want to be with you, Tams. You're it. I love you, I'm in love with you."

"What about Maddie?"

"It's like I said before, Tams. If I stay with her, then there's three people unhappy." He shook his head before continuing. "The only reason why I got with Maddie was because she was the first person to show me any affection after you'd stopped. I was with her so I wouldn't drown in my thoughts of you. You fucking crowd my brain like nothing ever has before, not even baseball or guitar. It's always been you, Tammy. It always will be."

A tear slipped down my cheek and Zacky leaned over to wipe it away with his thumb.

"What do you say, Tams? Will you stay here and be with me? We could take our time if you want, hell, we can date first if you want. I just want you to stay and love me like I love you and marry me nad have more kids and shit like that."

I giggled and sniffled, looking up to meet his green eyes, then made my face serious. "You swear you'll never hurt me again." I poked his nose with my forefinger.

"Tammy, I swear, if I hurt you again, you can...chop of my balls."

I laughed out loud and hugged him.

"Oh, God. I've missed you, Tams."

"I've miss you too, Zacky."

"Let's go get our son."