The Spotlight

The sunlight shined brightly through my window, and directly into my eyes waking me up. Yesterday, I had made a vow to myself to be independent, and I was going to stick to it. I got myself up and dressed. I walked downstairs into the kitchen where Jenna was sitting, with dark bags under her eyes, it seemed as if she hadn’t slept all night. Probably because of me, and I felt terrible because of that. She looked up at me as I pulled a snack bar out of the closet to hold me over until I got to Dunkin’ Donuts. I gave her and small smile and then walked over to her.

“I’m really sorry about yesterday.” I said looking down. “I didn’t mean a word I said, I was just really upset and needed to let out my anger on someone. And unfortunately you were in the line of fire.”

“It’s okay, Chloe.” Jenna said, and then wrapped me in a nice, loving hug. It felt nice to have her comforting me, I missed it. Mom used to just sit on the couch with me, in a tight hug, and we’d just sit there. It was something that the two of us would do together, no one could even explain it, but I just felt safe there wrapped in her arms. And Jenna was practically my second mom, and it felt just as nice. I took a deep breath and took a step back from her, and she smiled at me. “So where are you going?”

“I’m going to the mall, if you don’t mind. Just to get some air, and get out of the house.”

“Are you going to invite Soph or Maddie?” She asked.

“Nah, I think I just need some time to myself.”

“Okay, have fun, and be careful.”

“Will do.” I said and walked outside. I attached my bag to the back of my bicycle, stuck my headphones into my ears, my iPod into my pocket, and began riding towards the mall. Being 15 sucks. I was just one year short of being able to drive with an adult in the car, and then in one mere year after that I would be able to drive in the car alone. Hallelujah! Thank goodness my sweet sixteen was not far away, my mom and I were supposed to start planning it this week, but since she’s disappeared I haven’t been able to. Hopefully, I can at least play something, but most importantly I just wanted my mom to come home. My eyes began to tear up, the paparazzi would have had a field day with that, but that goodness I was wearing a pair of sunglasses. I had to hold strong until they found her, I listened as the song Poker Face by Lady Gaga began playing.

The cameras flashed like crazy as I picked up a donut from Dunkin’ Donuts and then once again as I locked my bike to one of the bike racks in front of the mall, and I detached my bag. I slipped it onto my shoulder as the cameras flashed more and more, shouting my name, wanting to know everything. I tried to cover my face, but it didn’t work so I turned around to confront the annoying reporters, well, they were more like yellow journalists and tabloid writers. A bunch of no brained pieces of scum is what they were. Did they even think how I might feel about my cheating boyfriend? Maybe I was hurting inside? Did they care? No. Of course not.

“How are you and Nick doing, since his cheating scandal?” One of the photographers shouted at me.

“Alright guys, we are fine. Nicholas and I are no longer dating, but we are still friends. Now, if you don’t mind I would like to go shopping.” I said fed up with them. I pushed past the photographers and into the empty mall.

It was Friday, the final day before school was out and kids were rampaging everywhere. I walked into one of the stores breathing deeply, those paparazzi were going to be the end of me. I walked straight up the girl who was working the counter, she immediately began to freak out about who I was. Just once, I’d like to go unnoticed, just once. I blame Nick for all this stupid fame, it’s all his fault! Why did he have to do this?! And then leave me all alone! I was ready to scream at this point, so I walked up to the cashier once again.

“Can you tell me where a bathroom is?” I asked.

“Yes, right in the back of the store.”

“Thanks,” I replied quickly, and ran to the back of the store, into the bathroom. I slid into one of the stalls and slammed the door shut, trying to release some of my anger. I cried, a lot in that bathroom. My make-up was running down my face like a waterfall with my tears. I just couldn’t comprehend why someone would do such a terrible thing? Is that why he was so distant? Could I have done something to stop it? I opened the stall and ran some cold water in the sink, and washed my face, trying to make it look like I hadn’t been crying. Unfortunately it didn’t work, so I put my sunglasses on once again and walked out of the bathroom.

I walked into Aerie to pick up some undergarments, when I walked into someone. My head snapped up immediately ready to apologize until I realized who it was. Because at that moment, I became speechless I didn’t know what to say. What did she expect me to say? Although the real question was, did I even have the strength to say anything at all to her? So the words that came out of my mouth were simply “Sorry.” And then I began to walk away until her arm caught mine, making me very frustrated.

“I’m sorry about the way you had to find out about Nick and I. But I asked him not to say anything to you until you came home, because I thought it would be difficult for you to deal with it while you were on tour. I hope it made things easier for you.” She said, and then I snapped.

“And I’m sorry because I don’t think you thought about me, or this, at all. If you thought at all, you wouldn’t be going out with a guy who already has a girlfriend! And maybe his girlfriend needed him to be there when she got home, because maybe there was something going on in her life that he didn’t know about. But obviously you didn’t think.” I hissed trying not to make a scene, and then as if to make this day just so much better I see Nick, who obviously heard what I had just said to his new girlfriend. He walked over to me, at a quick pace, sending Claire a look.

“Oh hey darling.” She said sweetly, trying to pretend that hadn’t just happened.

“Claire stop it. Chloe, why don’t we ju-”

“Why don’t we just do nothing. You must be quite happy with this idiot, so let me leave and let you two think together.” I said in a fake jolly tone, and then walked away fiercely, while Nick watched. He went to come after me, but Claire pulled him back, luckily for him. If he came within four feet of me I definitely would have knocked him senseless. I walked outside while texting my sister Jenna, to make her aware that I was coming home right now. When she asked me why, I sent one a one word text back, four letters, one word. Nick. I got onto my bike once more, undoing the lock, and strapping my bag to the bike. The photographers began shouting at me again.

“What was that confrontation?”

“Was it hard seeing Nick and Claire together?”

“GET OUT OF MY FACE!” I shouted, taking one of the photographer’s cameras and throwing it at the floor. I watched as the lenses cracked into millions of pieces on the floor, causing another frenzy of flashes. I ran and hopped onto my bike and peddled towards my house as quickly as I physically could. I peddled all my unhappiness and fears away just wanting to get home. Tears poured down my face as I pushed open the door to my house and ran inside, and straight into Jenna’s arms. I heard the shuffling of chairs and a few more arms join the hug. I looked up with tears in my eyes to see Joe, Kevin, Nellie, and Jack standing there. Finally, once I was calm and everyone had at least wiped one tear off of my face Jenna shooed them away. She pulled my face so it faced her, and I could look into my eyes.

“Sweetie, I’m not going to lie to you. I don’t know what you’re going through, I don’t know how you feel. But I do know that I want to help, I want to know what I can do. You have so much strength walking outside these days seeing him everywhere, and knowing what he did to you. Strength isn’t something you are born with, it’s something you have to achieve. And honey you have achieved so much I can’t even explain. I want you to know that we are all here to help.”

“Thanks Jenna,” I said, wiping a tear that had come out.

“You’re welcome. And I want you to know that I love you so much.”

“I know, I love you too.” I said wrapping her in a hug once more.