Everything is Not What it Seems

Katelyn’s P.O.V
So we were all currently sitting in the living room area. Everyone other than Three Days Grace seemingly thought I bumped into Ashley on purpose. Truth is Brian bumped into me which made me bump into Ashley, which resulted in her breaking her leg in two places. I wish I could say that it didn’t bother me but the truth is…after Ashley had been nice enough to tell me whenever I needed to talk, I could talk to her…it did hurt. It hurt a lot. I closed my eyes and smiled as we got to our next destination. Everyone did their set and we walked back to the bus and a guy pulled me into a kiss.

I pushed the guy away and took a look at him. Dark brown shaggy, skater boy hair style, and captivating blue eyes. My breath hitched in my throat and I involuntarily took a step back. “Ste…Steven,” I stuttered and I never stutter. Adam looked at me immediately concerned. “I…how…no,” I mumbled my voice shaky. I looked up at him feeling sick to my stomach as I took another step back with and kept doing so until my back hit the side of the bus.

“I’ve missed you Katie,” Steven’s stated reaching out and caressing my cheek lightly. I bit my lip to hold back a whimper. “Aw you didn’t miss me?” he asked in mock sadness. I looked up at him as tears began to stream down my eyes…and I did what I seemingly do best. I ran away. I grabbed my board and skated off fast and hard. I didn’t care that it was raining and I just got over being sick.

When I came back a few hours later with a slight limp. I noted Steven was gone and they were all watching a movie. “So was that your man of the month?” Brian asked with a smirk. It also was said in a heartless tone. I just glared before speaking up in the raspy voice I seemingly get when I cry a lot.

“No unlike you I don’t randomly have sex with strangers. That was one of my ex boyfriends,” I stated as my phone rang…when I was out I had texted Nikki about it…but it wasn’t her ringtone. So I answered without even thinking about it. I mistakenly hit speaker phone as I answered. “Hello?” I asked and was surprised at the harshness in Frank’s voice.

“Did that fucker hurt you?” he growled and I could hear Mikey, Ray, Bob and Gee in the background. I fixed it so it went back to handset mode before speaking up.

“No. I skated off after backing away from him,” I stated and I know it sounds bad but right now, I want to go curl up with a razor and add more scars to my old scars. Frank comforted me a little as new tears fell down my cheeks as I realized what I wanted to do. When I looked up again after hanging up and they were all staring. Big surprise there, please note the sarcasm behind that.

“You never told me his name,” Adam stated softly referring to the guy who used to hit me. I nodded when he stated, “And he was here.”

“I didn’t want you to kill him Adam. And you would have,” I whispered. My phone rang again and I answered it and frowned when no one said anything for a second. And then his voice spoke.

“Happy belated birthday, princess,” Came Steven’s cool, calm voice. The line then went dead. I felt more tears begin to fall as I closed my phone and shoved it in my bag. I went to sit down and pull my knees to my chest but Adam pulled me to him in a hug. I instantly latched my arms around his neck and buried my face in his chest. I felt him carry me into the other room before he sat me down and unzipped my soaked hoodie before pulling it off. He helped me stand before pulling my shirt over my head and handing me one of his. I left my bra on and pulled on his shirt before helping him pull my pants off.

I then pulled on the pair of lounge pants he offered me before letting him lead me back out to where everyone else was. I put my headphones in my ears and listened to my favorite song by Simple Plan. Why were Canadian bands so good? Oh my pen pal Avril is from there too! Anyways, the song playing was ‘Me Against the World,’ I smiled at the lyrics while resting my head on Adam’s shoulder. I drew in my sketchbook as the song changed to ‘Had Enough’ by a fairly new band out there. They called themselves Breaking Benjamin…their sound was awesome! I sang along to the first verse softly…but I think they could all hear me. “Milk it for all its worth, make sure you get there first. The apple of your eye, the rotten core inside. We are all prisoners, things couldn’t get much worse. I’ve had it up to here you know your end is near,” I smiled as I sketched out my next drawing. It was the same girl as always as I drew buildings on fire in the background. She had a small, but evil smile on her face.

The words above her head, were lyrics from the same song I’m listening to. They stated: ‘You should have learned by now, I’ll burn this whole world down,’ I saw them all peeking over my shoulder and could care less. I put my sketchbook down and curled up on Adam’s lap…Brian was to the left of us and Zack and Ash were to the right of us on the couch.

I fell asleep but when I did wake up I heard them all talking. So I did what any curious person would do, I kept my eyes closed and listened in on their conversation. “So what’s the deal with this Steven guy?” I heard Brian ask.

“Steven hit her when she argued with him. And when she said no he would get pissed and hit her more…sometimes kick her,” Adam explained before lightly lifting my shirt to point to my back. “She would come into work and her whole back would be covered in bruises and cuts, and she lied every time about it until she broke it off with him. Then she came out and said her ex boyfriend used to knock her senseless,” He stated before beginning to draw circles on my back with his finger.

I yelped when someone bumped into my broken or cracked ribs and winced as I clutched my ribs. I mumbled a few choice curse words before walking back to the bunk area. I heard someone follow me but didn’t think much of it because I thought it was probably Adam. I yawned and curled up on the bunk. I felt whoever it was sit on the edge of the bunk and felt them rub my back lightly. I yawned again as the person spoke up again in a whisper.

“Why’d you let him hurt you?” the voice asked softly. I shrugged before shivering because I was cold. I shivered slightly as the person traced one of the stars on my lower back. I yawned again before rolling over and coming face to face with who I had stupidly assumed was Adam. My green eyes revealed shock as they met the brown eyes of Brian Haner. I felt my breath hitch in my throat as I stayed silent. I hugged myself trying to warm up as he bit his lip.

“I’m sorry I bumped your ribs with my elbow,” He stated softly. I nodded half heartedly before walking out to the front as the bus stopped at our destination. I smiled realizing it was a hotel which meant a real shower! Unfortunately, the rooming arrangements had been changed up a bit. Because there were only three rooms available. Matt, Johnny, Jimmy, Barry, Brad, and Neil were in one room, the techie people and managers were in another, and finally, Adam, Zacky, Ash, Brian, Val and I were in the last room. I took a key before leaving to go find a Starbucks for a hot chocolate I craved. And before Matt says anything to suggest otherwise…It is not a pregnancy craving.

Unfortunately for me, Steven was the only other customer in Starbucks and by the time I realized it…I was already being dragged to the back room. In no time he roughly pinned me to the wall. He attacked my lips with a fiery, one sided kiss before attacking my neck in kisses. I bit my lip as he hit that one spot that I had learned to be my weak spot. I wouldn’t give him that satisfaction. And somehow he had managed to have his shirt and pants off in no time. Just standing there in his boxers, he pulled my lounge pants down slightly but I elbowed him in the face and kicked him in the crotch before pulling my pants back up and sprinting out of Starbucks and running to the hotel.

When I walked into the hotel room, the lights were off and everyone had split into the two bedrooms that were in here. So I stayed in the living room area and called Nikki and told her about what just happened and was sobbing quietly into my knees. I had ended up crying and sobbing so much that I was now hiccupping occasionally between my words.

“What did I do to deserve…this?” I wailed quietly into the phone as a door opened. I figured it was just someone going out to use the bathroom so I paid no attention to it. I hiccupped as someone stood in front of me. He knelt down as I continued to cry and wiped at the tears falling down my cheeks. I said goodbye before looking up to see Brian staring down at me. He pulled me up gently and I wiped at my eyes helplessly since the tears refused to stop falling. He pulled me into a hug and I instantly wrapped my arms around his neck as I cried into his shoulder. I think I fell asleep cause next thing I knew people were talking. I sat up and wiped at my eyes and yawned as Adam looked at me questioning. “I saw Steven last night,” I stated before grabbing my sketch book and taking out my pocketknife.

They all immediately stared at my wrists as I began to carve words into the cover of my sketchbook. I carved the words ‘Dreams are just lies your mind thinks of as you sleep,’ I then signed my name below it in sharpie.

I pulled out my laptop and IMed Nikki and talked with her awhile I knew they were still reading when I replied to her message. Her message had claimed but I was the one who took a fall and fucked up my knee so Ashley wouldn’t get hurt in the assembly. I replied ‘Yeah. Well as always in my life…I’m just the heartless, horrible bitch/Hollywood whore. Yeah I knew what they called me. Anyways I’m gonna call Gee. So talk to you later. I love you’ before turning off my laptop and calling Gee to ask him how his songs were coming. I then walked into the bathroom and took a nice, long, hot, refreshing shower. I realized in that moment...I had to move on...I had to move past this...past Steven, past the bitterness, past being treated like I'm a bitch when I'm not. Let the games begin.