Change Me to Your Point of View

Hannah only just managed to work through the exam. The horror on Syn’s face plagued her mind. But she couldn’t help but feel angry about the situation; due to the fact he found out Hannah’s deepest secret. She was a slitter, and if he was going to be his typical self the whole school would know by now, she’d lose her friends and be labeled an outcast again.

“HANNAH?! WE NEED TO TALK!” came Jimmy’s voice. Hannah froze as she heard his footsteps got closer to her. Hannah turned round and tired to look calmer than she felt.

Jimmy had an unreadable expression… “er… are you okay? I heard about your fight with Syn”

Hannah was a little stumped; she wasn’t expecting that. “I’m fine!” she squeaked.

Jimmy then took a deep breath and sighed. “Thank god… at least we don’t have to deal with two depressive people”.

Hannah threw him a puzzled look “what?”

Jimmy’s expression saddened “well… Syn’s really upset about what happened. It’s actually the worse I’ve ever seen him.” Jimmy ran his hand threw his hair “I’m scared for him Hannah… I don’t know what to do”.

Hannah watched her friend in worry, ‘time to play agony aunt’ she told herself. Hannah grabbed Jimmy’s hand and guided him to a nearest bench. “Well… what happen?”

Jimmy inhaled deeply. “Zacky was the one who found him, from what he said he was being sick in the bathroom. Then he started talking to himself, saying its his fault and that you hate him and that he was only trying to help.

“Then he punched the wall, making his knuckles bleed. But he didn’t care he just looked at it. It scared the shit outta Zack so he took him home. That’s when I found out.

“He hasn’t left his room and he’s not eating nor talking to anyone. He’s just sat on the bed staring at the wall.”

Jimmy was completely out of breath when he finished. Hannah didn’t know what to say; but one thing was for sure. Syn kept his promise… he didn’t tell the other about her cuts.

“Jimmy its okay, everything is gonna be okay” she reassured him and pulled him into an embrace.

Jimmy clutched into her “I hope so…”.

*** ***

It had been a week since Syn had been seen. He was the talk of the whole school. Some people believed he’d run away… others believed he was planning his suicide. But of course the rumors were all nonsense… only his friends knew the truth. The fact was he just taking a break from the world, his family wouldn’t let him leave the house till he was ready. He wasn’t even allowed to see his friends, only call them. All the guys were worried about him (due to the fact he wasn’t even allowed at band practice). Jimmy was the worse out of everyone; he often described Syn on the phone completely lifeless.

Hannah knew this was partly her fault, and she hated herself for it. But out of all the reactions she wasn’t expecting this. Hannah wanted to go round to his house, embrace him and tell him that it’s okay and not to worry. But she couldn’t bare to think that even if she went to see him it would only make things worse.

The lunch table felt empty without Syn, even Hannah grew to acknowledge that. What use to be a table full of laughter and fooling around was now one were no one hardy spoke and everyone sat eating.

“I think Syn’s coming back Monday…” Jimmy suddenly mumbled. Everyone looked up at him in surprise.

“What makes you think that?” asked Matt solemnly.

“Cause I’m seeing him tomorrow…”

Hannah’s head immediately shot up “can I come?!” she suddenly blurted out. Everyone turned to her in a amazement.

“Hannah look…”

“No Jimmy you look! Now everyone knows that the reason Syn is like this is because of me. I owe you guys as much as it is. Just at least let me try and explained what had happened between us…”

Everyone looked at each other before agreeing. “Okay Hannah, I’ll stop at yours first kay?” Jimmy stated. Hannah nodded; she was determined to make everything back to normal.

*** ***

Jimmy pulled his car into the Haner’s drive way. Both him and Hannah were completely silent the whole way there. Hannah’s eyes were glued to the house ‘It’s now or never’ she thought.

“Ready?”

Hannah turned her head to see Jimmy’s sad smile. “Yeah… lets do it”. Both of them stepped out of the car and walked to the door. Jimmy lifted his hand and lifted up the door knocker, it let off and echoing tap.

“Nervous?” Jimmy asked.

“A little…” Hannah replied shrugging.

“Ha-ha don’t worry… papa Gates is great!” he reassured.

“Papa Gates?” but before her question could be answered the door opened to reveal a man in his mid-forties, his black tinted Grey hair was brushed back and like Syn he had soft brown eyes and was very tanned.

“Hey Papa Gates how’s it going?” Jimmy chimed. Hannah decided just to stay silent… well a least till she was spoken to.

Papa Gates chuckled lightly “hello James!” Papa Gates glanced to Hannah and suddenly turned serious “you must be Hannah…”

Hannah’s breath got caught in her throat, so she nodded instead.

Papa Gates gave her a soft smile and motioned her to come closer. At first she thought he was going to yell at her but then she quickly changed her mind when he placed his hand on her shoulder.

“Thank you for coming. I think Brian needs to talk to you more than anyone” he spoke softly.

“W-why?” Hannah choked completely gob-smacked.

Papa Gates chuckled again “trust me sweat heart. I know when my son is sorry.” Hannah just nodded followed him and Jimmy into the house.

“Told you he was cool” Jimmy whispered quickly.

“It’s like they’re not related”

Jimmy laughed a little before they entered to kitchen were they found Brent eating cereal.

“Hannah!” he sang. Hannah forced a smile and glanced over at Jimmy who was giving to a ‘you-know-him?’ look.

“Unfortunately” Hannah replied in a hush tone making Jimmy chuckle.

“Okay kids he’s in his room…” Papa Gates spoke as he walked in.

Jimmy gave Papa Gates a salute and then lead Hannah up the stairs. Once they left they heard Brent saying to his dad “told ya she was hot!” making Hannah blush. Jimmy walked down the small hallway and stopped at the third door. Nerves began to take over her as her breathing got heavier.

“Jimmy you go first…” she whispered in a panic.
“Okay… come in when you’re ready” and with that he knocked on the door and entered the room. “Hey Synnie boy!” he chimed as he walked in.

“Hey Rev…” Syn spoke sounding incredibly tired. Hannah peeped through the door and saw that Syn was sat on his bed with an acoustic guitar in his hands.

“Laying down some tunes I see…” Jimmy commented as he sat on the office chair.

Syn just shrugged “not really…”.

Hannah took the time to study him, he eyes didn’t glow like they use to due to the bags under his eyes. He also looked a lot skinner than before. But suddenly Hannah completely lost her balance and fell through the door and right into the room. And to make it worse, she fell into the draws next to the door a made a loud crashing noise. Both boys turned to the source with different expressions. Jimmy was trying to hold in his laughter but Syn’s however was a mix of shock and confusion.

Jimmy couldn’t hold it in any longer and held his stomach from laughing “S-s-sorry Hannah b-but that was… priceless” Jimmy said in between his fits. Hannah blushed a deep crimson and slowly stood up. As she brushed herself off she glanced at Syn who had an unreadable expression on his face.

As soon as Jimmy felt the tension he immediately shut his mouth. “Well er… I think I hear Papa Gates calling!” and with that completely bailed out of the room.

Hannah's stare followed him in disbelief ‘I’m gonna kill him’ she hissed in her head.