Change Me to Your Point of View

"I just don't get it Val” Hannah spoke with a sigh as she stared at her ceiling. Val sent her a concern look as she sat down with two cups of hot chocolate. “I haven't done anything wrong have I?" Hannah asked glumly as she took her cup.

Val smiled "Hunny of course you haven't! Its just takes time for him to warm up to people" Val replied rubbing her back.

Hannah shook her head "but Val he's only known Johnny for a month and Syn considers him one of his best friends".

Val didn't reply at first because she knew Hannah was right. "How about this, tomorrow I'll get Jim to talk to him okay? Then we’ll go from there."

Hannah nodded and then cursed loudly.

“What’s up?” Val asked fearing that Hannah was going into a depressive state again.

"I forgot to study for Psychology, we're going to be given a mock exam in the afternoon and I have no frees" Hannah told her with a frown.

Val giggled "Hannah you’re the smartest person I know. Don’t worry you’ll past that with flying colors". Hannah smiled at her friend and then took a sip of her chocolate. “So what happened with Syn?” Val asked suddenly.

Hannah was a little taken back at her question and felt the depression creep back. “I really don’t know. I cam out of the bathroom and he was there. He made a rude comment about me taking so long; so I just ignored him. But then he stood in my way and demanded me to ask him to move… He was so close to me that I just froze. So he got aggressive and it just scared me so much it reminded me of my dad so I ran…”

“Hannah slow down! Wait what do you mean your dad?” Val asked, confusion written right on her forehead. The last part just slipped out of Hannah’s mouth without realizing; slowly she gulped… now was the time to tell her.

“The reason I left Jersey was because my dad was an alcoholic; my mum died when I was born and he became depressed because everyday I looked more and more like her.

“He never psychically hurt me, but there would be times were he wouldn’t come home for a week. He’d walk in, shit-faced and yell at me and call me names. What happened with Syn just reminded me of that so I got upset and left the room”.

Val stared at her friend with a heartbreaking expression, and then pulled Hannah into an embrace. “Hannah I’m so sorry… you didn’t deserve any of that” she gasped as fresh tears fell from her beautiful eyes.

Hannah hugged her back and felt tears run her cheeks as well “don’t be silly… it’s the past now”.

Val pulled back from the embrace and pulled a sad smile “Thank you Hannah… for being honest. Doesn’t anyone else know?”

Hannah nodded “Zacky… but that’s it. I will tell the others eventually”.

“Of course… I promise it won’t leave this room” Val whispered.

“Come on… I’m sleepy lets get some rest” Hannah spoke putting her cup on the side table.

Val nodded and went over to her put-you-up “see you in the morning Hannie”.

“You too” and with that the lamp was switched off and both girls fell into a slumber.

*** ***

“Is something troubling you Hannah?” a voice asked. Hannah opened her eyes to find she was on the ‘dream beach’ (as she likes to call it) again. Hannah turned her head to the side slightly and looked up. There was Syn’s soft, hansom face looking down at her; his brown eyes piercing her beautiful Grey ones.

“No Syn I’m just tired…” Hannah replied sitting up and stretching her arms. Hannah looked out to the horizon in front of her.

“You sure? Cause I can try and make you feel better…” Syn suggested with a smirk.

“Yeah? And how would you do that exactly?” she challenged turning her head only to meet Syn’s face deadly close to her face. Becoming lost in his eyes she could feel his hot breath on her lips. It was as if time had stopped completely when his lips claimed hers for the first time. Hannah wrapped her arms around his neck to deepen the kiss as he held her waist. Syn pushed her down onto her back. Hannah could feel his rough hands stroke her body making her shiver; but this moment was cut short from a sudden bright light engulfed them both.

*** ***

Hannah shot up from her bed. Her breathing was ragged and sweat poured down her face. She put her fingers to her lips; they were still tingling.

‘What the hell!’ she thought. He kissed her and… she loved it. She felt so alive when she looked into his brown eyes, feeling his soft skin against hers. She held her head in her hands and thought hard, what was with these dreams, and why did she freeze when Syn yelled at her in the hallway… it began to piece together.

‘You have feelings for Brian Haner Junior Hannah… and he’ll never return them’ her sub-conscience told her harshly.

Hannah felt tears stream down her face a third time that day as the truth sunk in. Why out of all the guys for her to fall for… she falls for the biggest asshole on the planet. Hannah wiped her eyes and turn on her side, hoping to fall back into the dream… but never did.

*** ***

“I am not ready for this exam!” Hannah cried out desperately. She rested her head on her big fat study book and inhaled deeply.

“Oh shut up women you’ll be fine” Zacky snapped clearly irritated with her negative attitude.

Hannah playfully glared at him before taking in the school yard around her. She and the gang always sat outside due to Hannah’s phobia of crowded areas. Today they sat on one of the picnic benches under the old willow tree. On the table was Hannah, Zacky and Jimmy. Against the willow tree were Val and Matt cuddling and just enjoying each others company. Hannah watched the couple in the corner of her eye and couldn’t help but feel some envy; which immediately brought her back to the beach dream. Hannah shook the thoughts out of her head and continued to study; but it was cut short by the annoying school bell.

“Fuck…” Hannah mumbled under her breath. The gang wished her good luck as they all went to their separate lessons. Whilst walking she was going through her mind all the different parts of the brain when she bumped into someone. "Oh sorry I didn't-" but was rudely interrupted by the person saying

"Watch where you’re going loser!"

Hannah did not need to think hard to know who it was; there stood Syn glaring at her with his arms crossed. Hannah’s mind immediately flashed back to the dream, the kind words… the kiss. She shook her head and scolded herself before bending down and picking up her books, trying to avoid his amused gaze.

"You’re so slow! Jeez I would have been home by now" he teased. What Syn was getting out of this she didn’t know, but her breathing was becoming more ragged than it should be.

‘And this has to happen before an exam! Shit I’m gonna be late!’

Hannah stood up straight and pushed her long brunette hair to the left side. "Sorry...” she mumbled and began walking away.

Syn suddenly gave her a disgusted look "When will you stick up for yourself huh?!?" he asked forcefully.

As much Hannah wanted to know what the hell he was talking about she had no time or patients; so she kept walking.

"HEY I'M TALKING TO YOU!?! HEY?!?!" he bellowed and ran after her. Syn grabbed her wrist “LISTEN TO ME…”

But he was cut off when Hannah suddenly yelped and tried to yank her wrist free only to cause more pain. Syn froze when he saw her pained expression, his eyes darting from Hannah and her wrist. His grip was tight and was causing tears to well up in her beautiful Grey eyes. With a questioning look Syn loosened his grip and pulled up Hannah's long sleeve to reveal the small but deep cuts up her arm. Some were new, some were old but one thing was for sure it wasn't pretty sight.

"Hannah I..."

Hannah took this chance to yank her arm free "Your the only one that knows” Hannah mumbled. “Not Val, not Zacky. You.” Hannah finally looked up at him, his face became pale and she saw… pity in his eyes. “Even though you hate me I would be grateful if you didn't tell the others" was all she said and walked away. Syn watched her, shocked by her words.

He wanted to call for her, make sure she was alright. But the words couldn’t come out; His stomach turned from remembering the sight of it, Syn immediately put his hand over his mouth and rushed to the boys toilets. Running into the nearest cubicle Syn threw his head over the toilet and puked. After two minutes he sat on the floor and rubbed his temple.

“What have I done?” he asked as he felt tears slowly run down his face.

“Brian?” came Zacky’s voice. He must have seen him rush in.

“GO AWAY!!” Syn choked. He didn’t want company at this moment.

“Like that’s gonna convince me…” Zacky grumbled as he pushed the cubicle door open. Zacky couldn’t believe his eyes. Syn was considered one of the most bad-ass guys in the school, always hiding his emotions and rarely letting anyone get to him; but it wasn’t the same Syn who is now an emotional wreck.

“Dude are you crying?”

Syn turned away from his friend “it’s my fault… I was only trying to help her” he suddenly sobbed. Zacky shook his head in confusion

‘I think he’s snapped’.

“I thought if I was mean to her she would toughen up, start sticking up for herself … but she didn’t. Why?!?” Syn was now holding his hands to his face and then he suddenly punched the wall; making his knuckles bleed.

Zacky flinched and went down to his level “Brian come on lets get you home” Zacky whispered swinging his arm over his shoulder.

“She hates me Zack…”

“Brian what are you talking about?”

“Hannah, she hates me… and I deserve it.”

Zacky heard enough… Syn finally came back to earth but in the worse way possible… guilt.