Fat Dancer

I am a failure. I am a liar. I am a stupid bitch. Many lines of discourage went through my head as I walked to the bus and into the bathroom. I locked the door. They must think I'm insane. Funny they haven't seen the half of it. I've never been that weak, to be caught and not even own up to it. They know I'm bulimic but the if they ever find out I cut it would surprise them.

A blue razor sat on the counter. Must be Brian's. I picked it up and smashed against the toilet bowl, the blade fell from the actual razor. I picked it up, it felt cold against my index finger. I lifted my shirt. The first time I pressed against my stomach, it barely cut so when the blood barely came I pressed harder..them harder, and so on. Before I realized it I had carved liar into my stomach.

The door handle shook it woke me from my estranged daze. They knocked. I choked so I opened the door and hoped for the best. It was a pretty girl, tiny but pretty and...unfamiliar. The look of horror hit her face that look the one everyone gives me has a trigger reaction. I felt it come up so automatically I turned toward the toilet she bent down next to me uncaring of the blood on the floor. She held my hair. I finished and I looked up. I was surprised at the kindness of the stranger. It hit me soon after...would she tell the guys about what she had seen? "Close the door." I mumbled, She let go of my hair for a split second to close the door. Her smile reassured me.

"I'm okay now." I told her.

"I'm Mackenzie. You can call me Kenzie though." She greeted. Why is she here?

"Who are you though?" I asked forgetting all my manners.

"Oh sorry I'm Zacky's girlfriend and Brian's little sister." She smiled and unlike before I could see the resemblance.

"I see it now. About before..." She cut me off.

"Don't worry about it. I won't tell but could you at least tell me why?" She asked. I think I owe her that much.

"I had sex with Matt. I don't even know why he wanted me I'm such a fat ass." I explained, tears welling up in my eyes.

"Sweetie your not fat. I went though the same thing you are now..the anorexia. A year ago..before Zack. Sweetie though if thats all your worried about is Matt, don't." She explained.

"But I lied about it to your brother and Michelle." I tried.

"I don't even think they would be mad at you for long. Matt is a man whore. I think even Val knows that he cheats non stop." She informed me.

"Thanks. How do you know all this?" I asked her.

"Your looking at one of his old one night stands well almost plus I've known these boys for years they were my body guards through high school." She joked..I think.

"What do you mean almost?" I asked genuinely curious.

"He was drunk last summer he tried to push himself on me I called for Bri he came and Matt got his ass kicked." She explained, I was taken back by her cussing...she looks so innocent.

"Oh. Well I should get this cleaned up." I said.

"I'll clean it. You go get him a new razor." She handed me a five.

"Really? Thanks so much." I smiled at her, not a fake one either. I'm going to get along with this girl.

"I'll do anything for a friend especially one that reminds me of myself...even if you are older than me." We laughed. I saw her grab a towel.

I went inside to the Quicky Shop. I grabbed a red razor and paid. I saw Brian walking in. "Hey Harlow." He greeted.

"Hi" I replied nervous. the razor felt hot in my hand.

"What do you need a men's razor for?" He asked with a smirk on his face.

"Oh I stepped on yours." I thought quickly.

He laughed and said, "I'll see you on the bus." He smiled. I sprinted to the bus but when I stepped on I looked at Kenzie and then everyone else. Everyone looked so serious. Brian walked on.

"No." He mumbled. Tell me she didn't say it was her. She was serious when she said she would do anything for a friend.

"Um Kenzie can I speak to you in the back?" I requested, she nodded. We walked to the back. "You didn't?" I assumed

"I told you I would do anything for a friend." She smiled. I took a breath and walked away. No way in hell did she think I was going to let her do that.

"Everybody. She lied to cover my ass. End of story." I announced

Everybody looked at me then her. "So you didn't step on my razor?" Brian asked. Dumb ass.

"No." I suppose Zack or someone had filled him in. Kenzie plopped into Zacky's lap. she is so tiny that she fits perfectly into Zacky and he's not a big guy.

They didn't look like they believed me. I narrowed my eyes and took a deep breath and raised my shirt. Jimmy read out loud Liar . I let my shirt fall. All eyes were on me. I didn't like it. Matt mouthed why. No one saw. I just glared.Brian looked at me knowingly, Michelle disappointed, and Zack looked clueless. I just walked to my bunk, and laid down.