Broken Glass and Bleeding Hearts

I could feel so many emotions that I just wanted to make them stop. It was like a flood of feelings that I didn’t want. And the worst part was the nightmare was over; I wasn’t asleep. Instead I was sitting on my bed in my pitch black bedroom with such a feeling of being over whelmed that I wasn’t sure what to do.

The tears were beginning to pull at the corners of my eyes when I vaguely heard a knock at my front door, no doubt in my mind it was a doctor or someone that my mom had called. She’d freaked out when she walked in after my screaming and I didn’t move or say anything except for “Turn the lights off please. They hurt my eyes.” But I don’t know any doctors that made house calls, so there must be one on the council or something like that.

I didn’t pay attention to the voices coming from downstairs mostly because I didn’t want to. In all honestly I didn’t want to pay attention to anything. I just wanted everything to go silent; the thoughts in my head, the world around me, and the emotions. I just wanted everything to stop for a while.

The heard the footsteps getting closer to my bedroom, it sounded like they were running, with another set further behind. I knew my door would open in a matter of seconds and the lights would come back on. I squeezed my eyes shut to avoid the pain of them and hoped that maybe whoever it was would spare the lights.

Their hand reached the doorknob and I took a deep breath to further steady myself for what was about to come. The knob turned, the door opened, the light came on, and then everything froze. The person didn’t say anything or even move so I wasn’t sure who it was. Until I opened my eyes and looked over that is.

Matt stood there in my door way, looking at me with wide and worried eyes. His expression was a mixture of shock, worry, terror, and disbelief. I closed my eyes again and opened my mouth. “Please turn the lights off. They make my eyes hurt.” My voice cracked badly as I spoke.

“E-ellie what happened? You were okay a few hours ago?” Matt asked, his question making my mind snap back to a time only hours before.

“Okay mom, Matt is here! I’m leaving so I’ll see you later! I love you!” I called as I jogged down the stairs, pulling my hoodie on as I did. It was the first night of winter vacation, and also the night of the winter dance no one had shut up about. Matt and I weren’t going to the much talked about dance; instead we were carrying on our long honored tradition of going to the pier to see it light up.

Our parents had been taking us there every year since we were five, and we’d been running off to do our own stuff for the past few years, the difference was this year we were going alone. It was a tradition that only the two of us shared since Star had never fully taken interest in it. Our parents had planned on going the following night so we hadn’t deiced if we were going with them yet or not.

“Okay, have fun and be careful! I love you too sweetheart!” My mom’s voice responded as I opened the door to see Matt. He smiled at me and I pressed my lips against his quickly, before walking outside and closing the door behind me.

“Please just turn the light off, it makes my eyes hurt.” I mumbled as I put my head down, in an attempt to avoid the light causing more pain.

“Elliebear?”

“Turn the damn light off! Please!” I could feel another unwanted emotion coming up; anger. The light suddenly flipped off and I sighed in relief. Then I felt my bed shift, telling me that Matt was sitting next to me.

“Ellie what is wrong?”

“I love coming out here this time of the year.” I commented as we stood against the railing of the pier, looking down at the gentle waves of the ocean below.

“Me too.” Matt’s voice whispered in my ear, making the familiar chills run up and down my spine and a smile to spread across my face.

“Look! It’s a duck!” Another familiar voice ran out clearly, before changing and rephrasing the exclamation. “I mean, look Sally, it is a duck!”

“We already know you are there Jimmy.” Matt and I called across the pier, only to watch as Jimmy turned around to face us. He smiled at us in a guilty manner and slowly walked over to where we stood.

“Funny seeing you two here.” He grinned nervously.

“Did you follow us here or just follow us from the time we got here?” I asked as Jimmy faltered under the stares of both Matt and I.

“I’ve just been following you since you two got here! And you’ll never take me alive! Never! Especially not with all the witnesses.” He practically yelled, making people turn their heads in our direction.

“Jimmy will you please just leave us alone for tonight?” Matt asked, shooting an unknown warning glance at Jimmy.

“Oh alright. But tomorrow, oh tomorrow shall be my day!” Jimmy turned swift on his heels and walked away while chanting he would one day rule all the world. I laughed and rolled my eyes as he disappeared, his voice still lingering.

“Make it stop! Just please make it stop!” I groaned as I pulled my knees to my chest and rested my head against them. The rush of emotions were literally making me sick. I wasn’t sure what I should feel, or better yet what I should do. I just wanted this to stop.

“Ellie! What is wrong? Look at me!” Matt moved in front of me and tried to pull my head up as fear dripped from every word. I could feel myself begin to shake so I placed my arms over my head; another failed attempt to block whatever this was.

“I can’t take it! I just can’t take it anymore! I need it to end!” I cried out, tears leaking from my eyes and my stomach doing flips violently.

“Elliebear! Damn it will you look at me?!” Matt’s voice came out even more urgent this time, the fear dripping thicker in his tone. “You were okay earlier this evening, when we said goodnight. What happened?”

“We are going to get caught.” I mumbled before pressing my lips back against his.

“Says who?” His voice was no louder than a whisper as we stood at my front door saying goodnight.

“It doesn’t take 10 minutes to say goodnight Matt.”

“I can make it take 10 minutes.” His lips met mine once again and this time I pulled away with a sigh.

“Goodnight Matt.” His smile fell slightly before his kissed me one last time.

“Night Elliebear. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“The doctor is on his way. It is a good thing he is on the council too.” I heard my mom say as I pushed myself closer to Matt. He was sitting on my bed with me snuggled against his chest as much as possible.

“It’s okay Elliebear. It’s okay. Now what happened?” Matt whispered in my ear before pressing a gentle kiss to my cheek. “You know that you can tell us.”

“I just want it all to stop! I don’t want to feel all these emotions! I don’t want this to be happening!” I burst out in sobs.

“It’s okay sweetie, it’s okay.” My mom told me, her voice comforting, as she patted my back and rubbed warming circles with her hand.

“I hear a knock at the door. It’s probably Dr. Shepherd, I’ll go get it.” I heard Matt’s dad say before hurrying downstairs.

“Please make it stop.” I sobbed more, feeling out of control as I wondered what was wrong with me. Was I breaking down mentally? Was something wrong with me? Or had the surprise visitor as I slept been enough to destroy the sanity I had left?

“Dr. Shepherd is coming, hang in there Ellie.” Matt’s mom told me reassuringly as I heard two sets of footsteps coming into my bedroom. I then heard Dr. Shepherd’s voice and he wanted to talk to my mom alone.

The next few minutes were spent in silence as the two talked is whispered outside my bedroom. I was finally getting myself back in control although now I was feeling even more sick than I previously had. “Its okay.” Matt whispered again as my sobs slowed down and quieted.

“Ellie?” I heard Dr. Shepherd ask lightly. I looked up at him and flinched from the brightness of the room. When did the lights come on?

“Yes?’ My voice cracked horribly, giving away the rawness of my throat.

“Did Angelica sneak in her somehow after you went to sleep? Do you know if she injected you with something?” He asked in a gentle voice as I felt Matt tense. I pulled myself from Matt’s embraced and faced the doctor to tell my story.

“Well for the past few months I’ve been having nightmares that involve her killing Matt and I both, and they’ve been getting worse. Then tonight when I woke up from the first one she was sitting on my bed. She explained a bunch of crap that I can’t remember then left, or I thought she did. I fell asleep again an hour later and felt something poke me while I was asleep. And when I woke up I felt so many different emotions taking over that it was just too much, then I started feeling really sick. I-I don’t know what happened.” I confessed all at once, not looking at Matt too much through the corner of my eyes due to the anger that showed in his face.

“Ellie I think she gave you a shot of a medicine for depressed vampires, and since you are clearly not depressed it brought on what you are feeling. The emotions should wear off soon, but unfortunately the feelings of sickness will probably last through the morning. I’m going to give you these pills to counter-act the effects of what she gave you so that you can sleep them off. They should also prevent the nightmares you described.” He reached into his bag and pulled out a bottle of pills, which he removed the cap and placed two in the palm of my hand.

“Here you go sweetie.” My mom handed me the glass of water so I could take the pills, which I gladly took. “So how long until the effects wear off?”

“At least an hour and a half. I’d suggest that someone stays with her until then though, because they will probably make her very sick for a while.” Dr. Shepherd stood up and smiled warmly at me. “I hope you feel better soon Ellie.”

As soon as he disappeared Matt jumped up and stomped out of the room in anger. I knew that it was because of the Angelica discovery and shuddered at the thought. I looked at my mom and his parents to ask my question. “Can Matt stay here with me if he will?”

“Of course sweetheart!” Came from the three of them before his dad stood up.

“I’ll go talk to him and calm him down.” I sighed and nodded as Mr. Sanders left my room to go find Matt. As soon as Mr. Sanders exited the room a silence fell as I laid back on my bed and closed my eyes, a yawn escaping my lips.

“Sweetie do you want me to stay with you?” My mom asked as she placed her hand on my forehead. I thought about it for a minute before answering.

“Please? At least until I fall asleep again.” I mumbled, the pills from Dr. Shepherd taking effect and making me feel sleepy and disorientated.

“I’ll go find Gary and Matt.” Mrs. Sanders quietly stated as she stood up.

“You don’t have to leave if you don’t want to Mrs. Sanders.” My voice was even more of a mumble than before as I started drifting out. I felt relaxed now that I wasn’t feeling so many different things, although they were still there they were not taking over, even though I felt incredibly sick.

I fell asleep for a while until I was woke up again by someone crawling into bed next to me and placing an arm over my side. “Matt?” I whispered with another yawn, knowing that our mothers were still present in the room.

“I’m right here Elliebear, go back to sleep.” His voice was the final component that I needed to fall into the first half-hour-sleep-period of the night.

When I awoke again, 30 minutes later, my stomach tossed violently and I could feel the nausea pulsing to get out. I tore myself from my bed and Matt’s arm and ran into my bathroom. Matt had ran in after me and waited while I vomited, gently rubbing my back and keeping my hair out of the way.

Roughly around 3 hours later the effects of everything had completely worn off, and I laid in bed with Matt’s arm draped over my side whispering a conversation to me. “Thanks for staying here tonight Matt.”

“You never have to thank me. Now will you please get some sleep so I don’t have to worry about you anymore?”

“Okay. Night.”

“Night.”

***
Matt went home around noon the next day, after we were sure I was back to normal, leaving me free to go to the one person who I needed to enlist help from. I slipped on the hoodie and grabbed my keys from my dresser before heading downstairs to leave. “Where are you going sweetie?” My mom asks, looking up from the book she was reading the second I walk into the living room.

“I’m going to go see Zacky. I’ll be home soon I promise.” I hurry through the answer, hoping to avoid being asked if I’m feeling alright. She nods her head with a look of worry on her face. She knows that I’m feeling better now, even though I still look like shit, and metaly decides that I must have a reason to go.

The drive to Zacky’s house didn’t take long sing there wasn’t much traffic on the road. I walked up to the door and lifted my fist to knock, which after the sound rang out I heard him yell that he was coming. “Ellie what brings you to my lair this early?” He asks before he fully looks at me. “What happened? I’m sorry but you look like crap. Kinda like you were sick last night.”

“I was, thanks to Angelica and some depression medication. And no before you as I am not depressed. I need your help Zack that is why I’m here. Can I come in?” I ask, sensing that his parents are out, probably Christmas shopping, and knowing that he can talk freely about the situation.

“Uh yeah come on in, and explain everything later, just tell me how you need my help. I mean I’m almost completely sure I’ll do it, unless it envolves dressing like a chick.” I walk in and sit down on the sofa which Zacky joins me on about two seconds later to ask him to help me out.

“I need you, and the guys if you need their help, to find out anything you can about little-miss-perfect-slut Angelica and I need it to be a secret to everyone else.”

“Alright I’m in. But why Ellie? I mean you and Matt could do it, or Matt could do it alone if you asked him to. Unless it involves him being in danger, because then you wouldn’t ask him to even try. What is going on?”

“She wants Matt so bad she’ll do anything. She’s going to try and kill me if she has to, and if Matt keeps refusing her she’ll kill him too.”

“How do you know this for sure though?”

I looked Zacky straight in the eyes and simply said “She told me so.”