Kill All Your Friends
Five
Gerard’s P.O.V
I think my mom knows that those cuts weren’t from accident too. Well, not surprised, accident is a lame excuse and I know it.
Last night, I hung out with some of my friends. I was walking with Helen. We mumbled something under our breaths and giggled together as we were actually thinking about the same thing when we knew Frank had invited his girlfriend to come along. We both didn’t like Frank’s girlfriend, Kelly much. Frank got mad cuz’ we wouldn’t let him know what we were talking about, but for god sake of course we can’t tell him. Kelly is his fucking girlfriend! How are we supposed to tell him? ‘What? Kelly is coming? Can we tell her to screw off? No one likes her here’ like that? Well, I know Frank doesn’t care much about his girl’s reputation, but still, we aren’t that mean. I think he’s mad it’s cuz’ we wouldn’t let him know what were we talking about.
When we settled in the restaurant, I was in extreme hyper. I don’t know why, but I was anyway. Maybe it’s because it’s that first time we all had time to spend a night together just doing random things in a month. I like those times. I acted like a total idiot when I was looking through the menu. After ordering, I was in super extreme unmorally hyper that was enough to text Frank who was sitting opposite to me
‘I love you XD.’
I didn’t know what the hell was wrong with me but I just did. I really don’t know why. Maybe I got unreasonable actions disorder. In my phone it said that I failed to send text but he actually received it and that bitch also leaned towards him to see what had he received. Kelly seemed shocked when she saw it, I guess Frank showed it to her openly. Kelly didn’t quite act normal and was stuttering. I laughed to myself, bitch. Helen leaned over to me and asked what have I sent. I told her the truth as I hope Kelly would be able to hear it and think I wasn’t serious. And I don’t actually know if I am or not. A few seconds later, Frank text back.
‘Hey…could you not do this to me anymore?’
I thought he thought that he was embarrassed by the text I sent him and showing it to his girlfriend. But after I sent him:
‘What did I do to you?’
His reply was:
‘You and Helen…’
I was so surprised about what he was actually thinking of. And so curious.
'Well, she's nice.’
‘I know she’s nice, but you and her are always whispering into each other’s ears’
Then I realized that he might be jealous. I had to admit that I was so surprised by his replies. I thought I know what was going through his mind so I tried to be a fucking tease.
‘So?’
Frank acted a bit down for a second but played normal through out the whole meal so I played along as well. After we got out of the restaurant, we stopped at the entrance of the mall and wondered where to go next. It was raining outside. I asked him what’s his matter as I actually wasn’t really sure. Frank suddenly started walking straight into me that I had to walk back, then he slapped me onto the wall with two hands on each of my side.
“I don’t like the feeling when I saw you and Helen mumbling something into each other’s ears.” He said in a matter-of-fact tone. I smirked.
“Well, I can tell you that I have the exact same feeling when you did the exact same thing to your lovely Kelly.” He did nothing then but turn away.
On the way to the record store that we agreed to go, we both were left alone at the back of the crowd. So I took my chance to ask him properly what’s up with him.
“Hey, so…what was that actually, you know…back there.” He shook his head.
“I don’t know man, maybe I just hate the idea of you and Helen being together.” He shook his head again running a hand though his short hair.
“But why? You’re the one who always ask who do I like and you’re the one who always hint that it would be great if Helen and I were together. Now that I had feelings for her and you come here and say you don’t like it again? What the fuck is wrong with you.” Ok so I was lying, I made up the whole thing (not the part that he said he liked Helen and I being together, that’s true) but who cares. Now that it seems that he cares about my feelings towards others, isn’t that a good thing?
“I don’t really know what the fuck is wrong with me, ok? It just felt like that so shut the fuck up!” he whined.
And then, there was it. There was something wrong between us. Frank looks at me whenever he did some close body contact with Kelly as he noticed that I would frown every time I saw it. I put down his hand when I saw him resting it on Kelly’s waist and he just smirked at me. And once, I forgot what he had done but he just peeped at me and I purposely looked away. Our actions seemed so ambiguous and dubious to each other, but yet seemed so normal to everyone around us as we acted so normal and as no one had seen us changing glares and peeps and smirks and giggles.
I had to get home as early as possible as my mom was probably starting to freak out because it’s nearly past eleven at night and she is an over protective mother. I texted Frank on my way home, telling him that I wanted to cry. He asked me why after a few seconds.
‘If you can’t figure it out then forget about it. But I think you fucking know why.’ I felt bad about the idea of him playing with my feelings the whole time. Maybe he’s not purposely playing with it but it just hurts. Like he really has some feelings for me but the fact that he has a girlfriend and the strangeness between us hasn’t change a thing about that is driving me crazy.
Frank hasn’t replied me since then. I think I was a little too harsh on him about this. Maybe he was just playing along but I had already fucking spilt out all my feelings for him. Fuck that.
FUCK!
I don’t want to be the only fool who sticks his head into these relationship problems. I don’t want to be the only one who was actually serious about this.
I felt so bad.
I don’t want to face him on Monday.
I think my mom knows that those cuts weren’t from accident too. Well, not surprised, accident is a lame excuse and I know it.
Last night, I hung out with some of my friends. I was walking with Helen. We mumbled something under our breaths and giggled together as we were actually thinking about the same thing when we knew Frank had invited his girlfriend to come along. We both didn’t like Frank’s girlfriend, Kelly much. Frank got mad cuz’ we wouldn’t let him know what we were talking about, but for god sake of course we can’t tell him. Kelly is his fucking girlfriend! How are we supposed to tell him? ‘What? Kelly is coming? Can we tell her to screw off? No one likes her here’ like that? Well, I know Frank doesn’t care much about his girl’s reputation, but still, we aren’t that mean. I think he’s mad it’s cuz’ we wouldn’t let him know what were we talking about.
When we settled in the restaurant, I was in extreme hyper. I don’t know why, but I was anyway. Maybe it’s because it’s that first time we all had time to spend a night together just doing random things in a month. I like those times. I acted like a total idiot when I was looking through the menu. After ordering, I was in super extreme unmorally hyper that was enough to text Frank who was sitting opposite to me
‘I love you XD.’
I didn’t know what the hell was wrong with me but I just did. I really don’t know why. Maybe I got unreasonable actions disorder. In my phone it said that I failed to send text but he actually received it and that bitch also leaned towards him to see what had he received. Kelly seemed shocked when she saw it, I guess Frank showed it to her openly. Kelly didn’t quite act normal and was stuttering. I laughed to myself, bitch. Helen leaned over to me and asked what have I sent. I told her the truth as I hope Kelly would be able to hear it and think I wasn’t serious. And I don’t actually know if I am or not. A few seconds later, Frank text back.
‘Hey…could you not do this to me anymore?’
I thought he thought that he was embarrassed by the text I sent him and showing it to his girlfriend. But after I sent him:
‘What did I do to you?’
His reply was:
‘You and Helen…’
I was so surprised about what he was actually thinking of. And so curious.
'Well, she's nice.’
‘I know she’s nice, but you and her are always whispering into each other’s ears’
Then I realized that he might be jealous. I had to admit that I was so surprised by his replies. I thought I know what was going through his mind so I tried to be a fucking tease.
‘So?’
Frank acted a bit down for a second but played normal through out the whole meal so I played along as well. After we got out of the restaurant, we stopped at the entrance of the mall and wondered where to go next. It was raining outside. I asked him what’s his matter as I actually wasn’t really sure. Frank suddenly started walking straight into me that I had to walk back, then he slapped me onto the wall with two hands on each of my side.
“I don’t like the feeling when I saw you and Helen mumbling something into each other’s ears.” He said in a matter-of-fact tone. I smirked.
“Well, I can tell you that I have the exact same feeling when you did the exact same thing to your lovely Kelly.” He did nothing then but turn away.
On the way to the record store that we agreed to go, we both were left alone at the back of the crowd. So I took my chance to ask him properly what’s up with him.
“Hey, so…what was that actually, you know…back there.” He shook his head.
“I don’t know man, maybe I just hate the idea of you and Helen being together.” He shook his head again running a hand though his short hair.
“But why? You’re the one who always ask who do I like and you’re the one who always hint that it would be great if Helen and I were together. Now that I had feelings for her and you come here and say you don’t like it again? What the fuck is wrong with you.” Ok so I was lying, I made up the whole thing (not the part that he said he liked Helen and I being together, that’s true) but who cares. Now that it seems that he cares about my feelings towards others, isn’t that a good thing?
“I don’t really know what the fuck is wrong with me, ok? It just felt like that so shut the fuck up!” he whined.
And then, there was it. There was something wrong between us. Frank looks at me whenever he did some close body contact with Kelly as he noticed that I would frown every time I saw it. I put down his hand when I saw him resting it on Kelly’s waist and he just smirked at me. And once, I forgot what he had done but he just peeped at me and I purposely looked away. Our actions seemed so ambiguous and dubious to each other, but yet seemed so normal to everyone around us as we acted so normal and as no one had seen us changing glares and peeps and smirks and giggles.
I had to get home as early as possible as my mom was probably starting to freak out because it’s nearly past eleven at night and she is an over protective mother. I texted Frank on my way home, telling him that I wanted to cry. He asked me why after a few seconds.
‘If you can’t figure it out then forget about it. But I think you fucking know why.’ I felt bad about the idea of him playing with my feelings the whole time. Maybe he’s not purposely playing with it but it just hurts. Like he really has some feelings for me but the fact that he has a girlfriend and the strangeness between us hasn’t change a thing about that is driving me crazy.
Frank hasn’t replied me since then. I think I was a little too harsh on him about this. Maybe he was just playing along but I had already fucking spilt out all my feelings for him. Fuck that.
FUCK!
I don’t want to be the only fool who sticks his head into these relationship problems. I don’t want to be the only one who was actually serious about this.
I felt so bad.
I don’t want to face him on Monday.