A Lot Like Falling

" Do you think Stephen would be able to find you here ?" She looks worried for me .It takes me a while to answer and she looks down afraid she might have crossed a line .

" I sure hope not ." I place my hand on hers to assure her she didnt .

" Dont worry Jensen and Jackson will protect you ! " Her face lights up." Hell even I'd give my safety for you ! Afterall you did the same for me ." Her smile is infectious , I cant help but smile too . Shes quite for a while as she eats her breakfast . Shes alot more understanding then she seems .As soon as I began her eagerness to undertsand me made me feel more comfortable teeling her my horror story ; well parts of it anyways . She opened up to me as well, turns out its just been her and Jackson for as long as she can remember , her father died when she was four and her mom left them when she was six . Hes the only one whos been there for her . She stares at me with admiration its mutual I admire her too . I admire the fact that she can still laugh and smile with innocence even after all life has put her through .

" Morning Jessica ." Jackson voice is soft but enthralling enough to be heard . He pours himself a cup of coffee .A small grin spreads across his lips as he presses the cup toward his mouth. I look away as soon as he switches his attention to Laila . She looks up at him finally ." Morning Laila ."He nods .

" Good morning Jack ." She bites her bottom lip then looks away as she fiddles with her sleeves .

" I see you decided to come back home ." His tone is a bit more demanding now . He leans against the counter and continues to look at her with a dissaproving stare .

" Im sorry I ju-"

" What? You just what ?... decided to runaway and give me another problem ."

" I came back didnt I ? I just needed some time to myself . " Its odd I had'nt noitced that she had been gone . Then again I havent really been in the right mind for a while now . I look down at my plate and try my best to look indifferent . Im not sure if I should get up and let them have their privacy or sit and finish my breakfast . I was never too good at these types of things .

" You could have told me. I deserve to know these things."

" Look , I'm sincerly sorry ;I wasnt thinking. " She looks at him with a pleading stare . Its easy to see she wishes they would stop arguing .

" Just please ... dont do that again." He rushes toward his sister and pulls her into a hug .

" Im sorry Jack. I'll never do it again ." Tears are filling the brim of her eyes as she holds on tight to her brother like a scared child .

" I'm just happy you're okay ."

" Oh great your back ." Jensen teased Laila playfully . " Good Morning Jackson ." Jackson nods acknowledging his greeting . My heart beats out of control when I see him . He turns to me and doesnt say a word . The whole world seems to stop . " Good Morning love ." He doesnt look away from me , he just keeps his eyes on me . I cant say a thing not even a simple good morning .

" Well I'm off . I have an audition ." Jackson passes by then looks back at me and Jensen ; the look on his face is un-readable .

"Audition ?" His mild interuption sparks my interest .

" Yep for Twilight . Have you heard of that ?" He gestures toward me as he throws on his jacket . Twilight ? I skim through my mind .

" I dont think so ." I feel chagrin . My short answer killed that conversation fast .

" Well you'll learn about it soon enough ." He winks then walks out of the kitchen .

" Ugh ." Laila sounds falsely annoyed . "Thanks to you I can never think of Jasper Hale as hot anymore cause everytime I picture him in my head I'll see your ugly mug ." She laughs as he shoves her slightly ."Oh well theres still Edward ."

" Oh ok . "

" Get out of here ." She pretends to kick him as he exits out the door.

" Drive me ?" He slowly picks up the keys in his hands .

" No shit , for real? "Her excitement makes me giggle. He smiles confirming her question." Sweet ."She jumps up getting the keys and races out the door .

The door shuts and I listen to their voices fade .His hands place on my shoulders and I feel him brush his lips against my ear . My thoughts go hazy . His touch still sets my feelings on fire ,he has such a advantage over me . " Come with me somewhere ? " He whispers .As if he even has to ask . I'd follow him into a sea of lava .

"Ofcourse." My answer is small and airy ; an affect of my loss of breath.

" Thank you ." He pulls on my hand and leads me out the door only stopping to grab his keys . I'll have to admit I feel nervous . I hate not knowing what will happen next but the feel of his hand on mine makes me forget all about it .

"Where are we going ?" My curiosity seems to be getting the best of me.

"Somewhere so you can prove me wrong ." He closes my door and jogs to the other side . He gets into the drivers seat and without another hesitation drives . I watch him and it takes me back to when I first got in the car with him . The first time I heard his voice . I would have never guessed I'd fall in love with him ; love had been the last thing on my mind . A soft mist touches my skin , the air is filled with it . I close my eyes and feel the cool of it against my eyelids. The car slows to a stop and my eyes blink open . He opens the door and strecthes his hand toward me. I take it and try my best to get out and stand gracefully on the uneven surface . The sound of the ocean waves crashing aginst the clift we are standing on make the mist seem more reasonble now .The rocks are a deep gray laced with green grass , the sky meets the ocean in a divine way sending a radiant blue tone to everything within five miles of it . " Beautiful ." I whisper as I walk toward the edge of the cliff to see the oceans waves .

" Yes it is . " He agrees as he walks slowly behind me . Even the air sends a angelic smell all around me . "And before I met you I thought I'd never see anything as breathtaking as this ." He puts his hand under my chin and leans in to kiss me . Heaven; I could swear I'm in heaven as he kisses me here in this haven . The wind picks up moving my hair all around me .He pulls me closer and deepens the kiss ." You proved me wrong." His whisper is a soft warm breeze against my lips . His eyes seem a green ablaze in this lighting .Please let this be real let this angel be real and not a dream , and if hes not may I sleep all my life . I never want to live another day without him .

" Hold me tighter please ." I Whisper and he pulls me closer .His kisses on my neck make me feel weightless ; his touch is ecstasy ." I was afraid you'd leave me after last night . " He pulls away his features set in a bewildered expression.

" One .Im completely in love with you and anywhere where your not would simply be hell . Two. Making love to you was the most amazing thing I have ever experienced in my life . Id be insane to ever leave you ." I pull him to me again this time Im the one who is taking control . Nothing could pull me out of this moment that much I was sure of till a distant memory flickered on and off in my mind like a dying lightbulb . It wasnt familiar but it was clear like I had personally experienced it before .

~~~
The slick road is moveing quick beneath my tires. The dark night sets a feel of anxiety in the atmosphere . My neck is burning ,the bruises on it hurt so bad .The simple touch of the air makes tears appear. I dont know where Im going but I have to get away . I have to leave I have to live, but I forgot something ; someone. I cant keep going without her .How could I be so stupid ? The freezing rain gets harder with every passing mile and my hands are shaking when I decide to go back . Im going to go back! I cant leave her there .What was I thinking ? I'm going to turn this car around. One swift movement and its spinning out of control . The brakes ! Im hitting the brakes but it wont stop. The pedal is loose . NO! he cut the brakes ? Im sobbing uncontrollably I try to reach for the door handle but Im slammed against the wheel . My visons blurry but I can feel the car is still out of control. The wind is picking up as I feel the car taking a plunge into what seems to be black waves . The car hits them and the water creeps in slowly . Id fight harder if I could move but my legs feel paralyzed and my chestburns with every breath I take .I never meant to leave her alone with him .I dont want to die. The water slowly pulls me under . I cant breathe and I cant fight it either . Im so sorry Jess. I love you honey .My breathing is cut short .

~~~
No!. I come back to my reality. That definetly wasnt my memory . I push away from Jensen and look down at the blue soft waves below me . They look nothing like the black water that my ... mothers memory showed me . I fall to my knees my body is shaking violently . Rage Takes over me .

" Jessica." Jensen is at my side trying to pick me up . " Did I say something wrong? " I hear the urgency in his voice but I cant look back at him . The ground feels rough under my hands and I beat my knuckles against it till they bleed . " Jess stop ." Hes pulling my hands but I push him away making him loose his balance . " No !" Im screaming at the top of my lungs . "That son of bitch " I cant breathe. Stephen killed my mother . I lay my head against the cool ground and breathe in trying to calm down . He'll die for this . I feel Jensen slowly walk back towards me .I get up off the ground and look back to him.

" Who's the son of the bitch ?" He looks afraid of me . Holding his hands up in front of him . He probably thinks I'm insane. One moment Im hugging him and the other I'm almost pushing him off the cliff. I wouldnt blame him if he got in his car and drove away now .

"Stephen killed my mother ." My voice is numb . He doesnt question how I know this he just walks toward me and brushes his hand against my cheek keeping a safe distance between us . My heart burns with desire for him to come closer. I clench my fists as my veins pulse with rage . Every nerve in my body is screaming for me to tell Jensen to drive me back to Stephen so I can kill him now . No . It wont end that easily . Im going to think this out carefully . Stephen wont ever see it comeing . "Jensen ?"

" Yeh ?" He comes closer and I calm down ,my love for him taking over all the rage that isolated my thoughts a minute ago .

" Im sorry for that . I'm just starting to peice some things together. Things I'm not even sure I can handle." Im not going to lie to him ."I didtn mean to push you away like that ." I walk toward him and press my lips to his .His tense state fades and he runs his hands through my hair .

"So what are we going to do about your mothers killer ?" This question lets me know he's not going to let me do this alone either .

" We'll both find out pretty soon." I look past him into the the trees and breathe out the last of the remorse I will ever feel toward Stephen Layden.