A Lot Like Falling

I cant sleep again; I'm afraid too .Its been forever since I've had sleep but I dont want to see Stephens face again. Its bad enough it haunts me even when I'm awake.
I turn to look at Jensen hes sleeping so peacefully . I wish I could dream with him, so he can put me at ease as I sleep like he does when Im awake. Two weeks, two weeks since Ive been here in New York with Jensen and I still feel so badly bruised like all my fading bruises are still fresh . He turns toward me and lays one arm over me I grunt when he touches my ribs. The slightest touch and I feel pain . It goes away when I calm down .Jensen . I smile slightly at the thought of the affection he gives me . I cherish every kiss ,every word ,every touch . I think I love him .

" Jensen ." I whisper his name and run my hand down his face. He doesnt wake up .Its a good thing because I'm not entirely sure why I wanted him awake anways. I guess I should try to fall asleep . I dont think I can afford to take on another day sleep deprived . Im trying to drift off but I keep hearing muffled voices, it sounds like they're arguing . I take in the fact that I might be hallucinating again and shut my eyes untill I hear Jackson raising his over somone ; Laila Im pretty sure . Nope I'm not hallucinating ,unless the Rathbone siblings are the new stars of my nightmares. Its none of my bussiness. I know but I cant help but get up and go out to the hallway so I can hear better .

" Hes not right for you ! "

" And who are you to say whos right for me ?"

" Im your brother !" I can hear the frustration in his voice ." I dont want you to see him anymore ."

" You cant do that ... I love him." Shes crying and its making her words hard to understand .

" You love him ? For real ... This ! " She cries harder ." This is love ? "

" Let me go Jackson ! "

" Theres bruises all over your arm ." his voice is low , You can tell hes trying to get her to stop crying. "Thats love ?"

Her sobs slow down ." You dont understand ."

" The hell I dont ! because its NOT love . Love doesnt hurt Laila ! and your pretty damn stupid if you think its right if it does ."

The door opens and She stops when she see's me . Her mascara is running down her face , she looks like a mess .I look at her arms and her left one is covered bruises . I dont know what to say or what to do . I'm trying to think up an excuse for why Im standing here . Why the hell am I here? I should of stayed laying down . She doesnt bother waiting for my excuse and shakes her head as she runs down the stairs taking quick breaths trying to hide that shes crying.

"Did we wake you ?" I look into the room and hes standing there with his thumb and index finger pressed to the bridge of his nose ." Im terribly sorry if we did ."

" N-no I was actually heading dowstairs for a glass of water and I-" I stop explaining when I notice I have no excuse as for why Im standing in front of his door . He puts his hand down and looks at me . I freeze, I feel like his stare is burning right through me .

" Shes impossible ." He tries to laugh it off but the pain is too strongly demonstrated on his face . I dont know exactly what hes waiting for from me . He sits down on his bed and looks back at me ." I dont know what else to say . I just want her to live to see twenty one atleast. And with the way shes going shes just going to end herself . " Tears are coming up from behind his voice and for once I see jackson for what he trully is . Hes not just the over confident guy with way too much to say hes a loving big brother , a protector for Laila just like Jensen is for me . I walk in and sit on his bed, patting his back to give some comfort . He puts his face in his hands .

"Hes beating her ." I say it but its not a question .

"Well she says no cause he hasnt thrown any punches and stuff like that but he does grab her arms hard enough to leave bruises I think thats enough for me to call it battery. "

" Your right ." Tears fill my eyes as I think of the bruises on her arms . The look on her face . I've been there before and it was much worse . I look at my hands the yellowish shade of my fading bruises covering them . I pull my sleeve down to hide them . He moves his hands away from his face and softly takes my hand in his .

" What happened to you ?" He looks shocked like hes seeing my bruises for the first time . I dont know if I should tell him , it may be too much . Or maybe I should tell him. " Did someone hurt you ? " I pull my hand away softly and its like he can read my mind . " Who were they to you ? "

" My dad ." I stare down at my hands and he lifts my chin up .

" How did you get away ?"

" I ran ... and then Jensen found me ." I try my best to keep it short. He stops then looks down again fury in his eyes.

" Any guy that thinks he can lay a hand on a woman is not a man ." He balls up his fist ." Hes going to get away from her if its the last thing I make damn sure of ." He gets up and reaches for his car keys .

" Jackson ." I stop him ." What are you doing ?"

" I'm gonna find that son of bitch and teach him that its not ok to hurt my sister . "

" I understand your mad Jackson but this is not the way to deal with it ... you could get hurt. " He turns to look at me the anger in his eyes calming when he meets mine . I stare intently back , for some reason I dont want to loose this moment . I want to hold him and tell him everythings going to be ok . This cant be happeneing . I know what your all about . Lailas comment runs through my mind .

Apparently she does .