Walking in Memphis in the Pouring Rain

Lunch.

Possibly the thing I hate most about high school. It honestly sucks. It’s the perfect place to meet up with everyone, but most unfortunately, you have to deal with everybody else in the room at the same time. That includes the people that hate me-namely, the homophobes.

Isn’t it strange how they all sit together? I mean, you have the preppy cheerleader girls whose boobs are about to fall out of their shirts at the very back table, next to the windows. Then, right in front of them, you have the sporty, slutty jocks, who are probably waiting for those girls’ boobs to fall out of their shirts (EW!!). Next to the cheerleaders--taking up two tables shoved together--are the cool honors students. The ones who do yearbook, track, student council. In other words, the cool geeks. In front of their table farthest from the cheerleaders (and the farthest away from the sun) are the Goth and emo kids. That’s where we sit. Next to us are the real nerds and geeks. The ones who do just their school work and the debate club. But they’re really nice.

“Heyyyyy, look who it is! It’s lover-boy!! I heard you saw Peter and Ashlee making out in the back of History class, and that you were analyzing them, trying to pick up tips.” My best friend--besides Jamie, of course--Cathy loves to make fun of me, calling me “lover-boy” all the time. She’s the only one I’ve ever told about mylove for[/]crush onattraction to feelings toward Jamie, and she constantly makes fun of me for it, in an underhand sorta way. She’s the reason why not another soul knows about how I feel. I really don’t want another Cathy hanging around me.

“I wasn’t even looking at them. I was drawing, see?” I hold out my hands so she can see the rose. She loves to draw, so I expect her to be impressed. I just forgot about one thing. The small scratches I have on my arms.

Now, this isn’t what you think. I’m not a cutting emo kid. Honestly. I have been cat-sitting for my neighbors when I get home from school, and they don’t like me. Not at all. Not that I haven’t done stupid things like that in my time. I did, for about two years. But then I found To Write Love On Her Arms, and a whole new way of life. I will never resort to self-harm ever again in my life.

However, Cathy went through her own stage of events that were very similar to mine. She doesn’t know about mine, though. I don’t like all of my secrets in the same person, thanks.

“WHAT THE HELL?” She whisper-yelled at me. “What exactly is this, Zacky? What the hell has been going on at your house? I mean, I know your family life is shitty and all but-”

I was going to continue to let her rant, and have her fill, but she was cut off by Jamie, who was sitting next to me. “He’s cat-sitting for his neighbors. You know, the ones who don’t like him,” he said, very matter-of-factly.

“Oh. Why didn’t you tell me that?” Pouting just a little bit, she turned to me.

I lightly smacked Jamie on the arm. “Why’d you ruin all of my fun?” I glared at him. Or, rather, I tried to. I ended up smiling at him while my eyes glared, so it didn’t turn out so great.

“Because.” That’s all? I wanted an explanation!

“Because why?” I poked him in the stomach this time.

“Hey, no fair! I’ll get-” I didn’t hear the rest of what he was going to say because he was cut off by the rather loud person behind me. Dangit.

“Hey, you never told me why, Zacky!!! Can you hear me? Am I like your mother or something? NO! I’m your best friend! So don’t ignore me, mister!” Hands on hips, she looked quite scary with her black lips and bright pink hair. Covered in studs and piercing that she’d put in herself, Cathy wasn’t someone people often messed with. But once you got through her tough, hard shell, she’s as sweet and cuddly as a Gloomy Bear or Skelanimal. She’s quite the character, too, she’s incredibly funny when she wants to be.

“It never came up in a conversation, so I didn’t feel a need to tell you. Besides, I was trying to show you the rose I drew in my arm.” I hold it up right in front of her nose. “See? Can you see it now?”

“No, I can’t see it. It’s too close. Let me take it in.” Shoving my arm away from her face, she looked at my artwork. I held my head high. I was very proud of what I’d done.

“Erm, Zacky, I’m sure it’s a great drawing but…it’s smeared. I can’t see anything but grayish marker smears all over the place.” She looked up at me sadly. “I’m sorry.”

What? “Awww crap! It looked great, too!” I pouted. I worked hard on that!

“Awww, I’m sorry, Zacky.” Jamie wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into a tight hug.

Wait, a hug? Just for me pouting? My mind went into overdrive. Usually, he just puts an arm around me. But this is a full-on, three-alarm, tight squeeze, dating hug. This isn’t normal. Is he crushing on me? Am I just paranoid? Does he like me as much as I like him? Wait, he’s still hugging me! What am I supposed to do now that wouldn’t make me seem like an huge teenie girl?

I hugged back. I mean, what else am I gonna do? I heard a lot of coughing from behind me. “Um, okay, I love guy on guy action as much as the next girl, but come on, you guys. We’re in the cafeteria. Anyone could have a cellyphone trained on you guys right now. Do you really want this all over Myspace before the end of the day?”

She had a point. I reluctantly drew away from him. “What’s with the lovey hug anyway?” She looked questioningly at me. I shook my head very slightly. No, but I wish we were dating…

“I don’t know. I just felt like hugging him. Is that a crime?” Jamie smiled his adorable smile.

“Nah, just different.” Cathy stole the bag of chips Jamie had put on his tray. “Yummy, thanks for the lunch, by the way.” Did I mention that she never ate at school? At home, she ate enough, but school? Forget about it. I don’t blame her, either. Neither of us have any money to get anything besides crap and pizza, and the pizza is usually gone by the time we get there, anyway. So we usually stole the good stuff from Jamie and ate that for lunch.

I took one of his sugar cookies. “Ditto to what Cathy said.” I munched on my sweet treat.

“You guys are gonna eat me out of house and home,” Jamie fake-complained.

“Yep.” Cathy smiled. “And we’re gonna repay you by letting you eat whatever you want when you’re at our houses. Either one. Right, Zacky?”

“Mmmhmmm,” I said through a mouth full of cookie. How sweet lunch can be, when you ignore the bitchy guys and girls. In fact, I haven’t had one thing thrown at me yet.

All of the sudden, I feel a banana peel make contact with the side of my head. Okay, so I lied. Oh well. Nothing new.