Heartbeats Away From Disaster

As I drove through downtown, I rolled my window down, letting the nice cool air wash over me, cooling my body after the fight I just had with Mitzi's jerk of a boyfriend. The scene I had witnessed a few minutes prior flashed once again in my head, causing my anger to flare up inside of me.

Cursing to myself, I slammed my foot down onto my clutch, and shifted into fifth, allowing for me to drive even faster through downtown. I wasn't sure where I was going; I didn't have any destination in mind. All I knew was that I had to get as far away from Mitzi and Lyle as possible. There's no doubt in my mind that a neutrality between Lyle and I was out of the question now that my gut feeling toward him had been proven correct.

It killed me to watch the man who was supposed to be faithfully committed to Mitzi kiss some other girl. What hurt even more though, was to stand there and have Mitzi look directly into my eyes, not believing a single word I said when I told her what I had seen. Had I really been so horrible to her in the past than even now she wouldn't believe me? Was it possible that I had hurt her so bad that she was determined to make her next relationship work despite whatever he may do to her?

Silently, the tears snuck up on me and it wasn't until I felt the moisture on my cheek that I realized I was crying. Muttering a few choice words under my breath, and I reached up and hastily wiped the tears away. Drying my hand on my pants, I slowed down and set out a definitive route.

About twenty minutes later, after I had parked and turned off my car, I approached the front door and reached up, ringing the doorbell. Anybody else would think that the owner of the house was already fast asleep, but I knew better. About a minute later, the door opened and Matt stared back at me, giving me a confused look.

"Craig?" He asked slowly. "What," he paused for a moment, looking around to see if anybody else was with me, "what are you doing out this late? Is everything okay?" His questioning eyes scanned me as if he would be able to lift the answer directly from my mind.

Staring directly into his eyes, I swallowed my pride and took a deep breath, letting it out in a slowly.

"I love her." I mumbled, nodding my head as I finally agreed to what he had been telling me all along.

I loved Mitzi. I loved her more than you'd think it was possible for a broken man like me to love someone.

Matt eyed me silently for a couple of seconds, trying to determine whether or not he had heard me correctly. He opened his mouth, and then closed it, only to open it once again.

"What?" Was all he asked.

"I said, that I love her." I whispered. "I love her, Matt, and I need her back in my life. You were right and I'm admitting it right now so do me a favor and don't start rubbing it in my face, saying 'I told you so'." I said. "And if I could, I would turn around right here on the spot, and go back to tell her that, but she's pretty pissed at me right now." I mumbled.

"Craig," Matt said quietly. He looked as if he were going to say something else, but instead he stopped himself and stood back away from the door, motioning for me to come inside. I did as he asked, and watched him close the door behind us before I followed him through the house and to the living room.

He nodded to the couch, indicating for me to take a seat before he disappeared into the hallway. I sat down and took a look around the living room before Matt reappeared, packing a couple bottles of water with him. He handed me a bottle before he took a seat beside me.

"So," he broke the silence, opening his water, "you finally realized now much you love her, huh?" He said simply.

I nodded my head as I fiddled with the label on my water bottle.

"But, somehow you managed to do something to piss her off, again."

"Seriously, did you have to throw that 'again' part in there?" I mumbled.

"Sorry, couldn't help it." He replied. "What did you do that has you convinced that she won't listen to anything you say to her?"

I sighed heavily as I opened my water, and paused momentarily to take a drink. I licked my lips and then replaced the cap on the bottle before I glanced over to Matt. "I got into a fight with Lyle." I admitted.

"A mouth fight or a fist fight?"

"Fist fight."

Matt let out a low whistle and shook his head. "She's not going to talk to you for a while now, eh?"

"Believe it or not, I was actually trying to get along with him. Needless to say, it wasn't working out too good, and before Mitzi had even joined us at the bar, I had given up." I said. "But then, I saw him flirting with some other girl, and then I watched him with my own two eyes as he kissed her."

"What?!" Matt's eyes grew wide and he dropped his water in surprise. Shortly afterward, his look of surprise went away, and was replaced by anger.

I nodded my head, knowing exactly how he was feeling, seeing as how I had felt the exact same way when I had had to witness it myself. "So, I kicked his ass, just as Mitzi walked into the bar. I told her what I had seen, but she didn't believe me. She told me to go home because she didn't want to deal with me." I sighed heavily and shook my head in disgust. "She seriously thinks that I would whip up a lie that bad, and try to feed it to her."

At my words, Matt remained silent, but gave me a sorry look. After about a minute or so, Matt finally spoke up. "Mitzi is probably just about as broken as you are, Craig." He said quietly. "She hasn't been involved in an actual relationship in so long, that she's probably trying her best to hold onto this one. That, and because she's probably scared to trust you again; with her love life at least."

"I should have said 'yes' when I had the chance." I muttered. "How can I possibly get her back now that she's off with that jerk? She won't even believe a single thing I say anymore."

"Don't be so dramatic." Matt sighed. "Just give her time to cool off, and then go back and just try to win her back."

"How the fuck am I supposed to do that?" I asked. "Lyle is everything she wants in a guy, hell, she almost even said that he was everything she wanted me to be."

"What do you mean 'almost said'?" Matt asked quizzically.

"I cut her off before she was able to finish her sentence." I mumbled.

"Craig, the only way you're gonna get over all of this is if you just go up to her and tell her how you feel. Fuck what she says, fuck who she compares you to … as long as you tell her how you feel, that's all that should matter." Matt insisted.

"But, what am I gonna do about her being with Lyle?" I asked. "She's not gonna leave him."

"You're gonna have to find a way to win her back, man." Matt replied. "Come on, this should be easy for you; you know her better than any of us. You know what she likes, you know what it takes to make her smile. It'll probably be a lot easier than you're making it out to be."

Nodding my head, I took a drink of my water and mulled things over in my mind. Matt was right, out of all the people Mitzi knew, I was the only one who knew her inside and out. I should know what it would take to win her back, right? Well, if that were the case, then why was it that I felt just as lost as ever at the moment?

Like I said, I wasn't good at being a boyfriend, which is why I let Mitzi go in the first place. But now that it came down to it, I was going to have to suck it up and try my best because it was either that, or sit around and watch her fall head over heals for some jerk who ran around behind her back.

I just hoped that if I somehow was able to win her back, that this time things would be different. I hoped that this time I could be the boyfriend she hoped for me to be.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Hearing the doorbell ring, I cursed loudly to myself and discarded my towel, hastily pulled on a tank top and a pair of sweatpants, and ran downstairs to see who was at the door. Seeing that it was a delivery guy holding a large bouquet of pink roses, I actually did a double take and looked around as if expecting he had gotten the wrong address.

"Mitzi Carter?" He smiled.

"Yes?"

His smile widened as he handed the flowers over to me. "For you, from a friend." He said, tipping his hat slightly. "Have a nice day now."

I barely had time to utter a 'thanks' before he turned around and made his way down the sidewalk back to his van. I stared after in his bewilderment for a few seconds before I snapped out of my stupor and closed the door, taking the flowers to the living room. There, I sat them on my coffee table and tugged at the card.

It slid easily out of it's card holder, and I opened it up only to recognize a familiar scribble filling up the inside.

Mitzi,
I'm sorry about the other night. I know that it was childish of me to do so, but I hope you know that I did what I did only because I wanted to stand up for you. I'm not sending these in hopes that you will believe my side of the story, but instead to apologize. You know that I hate having you mad at me, and I know that one way to earn your forgiveness is to send you some of your favorite flowers. Give me a call if they're working and maybe we can make plans to go grab some dinner or a movie. Maybe both.
XOXO,
- Craig

I read the note twice over and couldn't help but smile to myself. The events of what happened at the after party still stuck in my mind as if it had happened an hour ago, but despite what Craig had done, I still missed him.

We hardly had gotten to hang out since he and the guys had returned home from tour. I spent most of the time so far either hanging out with Lyle, or being mad at Craig. Being mad at someone as likable as Craig is very exhausting, so of course I found it in myself to forgive my best friend.

Setting the card aside, I reached for my sidekick and speed dialed Craig's number. He answered after the first ring.

"Hello?"

"Craigery, since when do you sign your notes with 'hugs and kisses'?" I grinned.

Craig laughed softly on the other end of the line. "Since I wanted to get back on your good side." He admitted. "I take it the flowers are working?"

"Very much so." I smiled. "Where do you want to eat at?"

"Doesn't matter." He replied. "Anywhere is fine with me."

"Okay, does Tomo's sound good?" I asked. "I've been dying to go there lately, but no one wants to go with me."

"Tomo's is fine, sweetheart." Craig said. "I'll come pick you up in a few minutes if you make the reservations."

"Alright, deal. I gotta get dressed anyway, I just got out of the shower."

"Oh?" Craig asked. "You mean to say that you're speaking to me in the nude?" He asked teasingly.

"Craigery," I laughed, "I don't know what kind of things you're picturing over there, but stop right now or else I'm gonna kick your ass when you get here." I threatened.

"Hey now, no need to get violent. I was just curious." He said. "And plus, I can't help what sort of images are running through my mind. I mean, once a man as seen you naked, he certainly has a hell of a time forgetting about it."

"Craig, stop it." I laughed, feeling my cheeks start to burn. "Can we quit discussing my nakedness?"

"Fine," Craig laughed, "I'll see you in a few." He said. "Clothing optional." He added.

"Craig!"

"Sorry, sorry." He giggled. "I'll be over pretty quick. I love you, bye."

Caught off guard, I wasn't even able to collect my thoughts and form an audible 'goodbye' before Craig hung up, ending the call. I sat there, my sidekick still pressed to my ear as Craig's words echoed in my head.

Three simple words that I haven't heard uttered in the sound of Craig's voice for at least a year. Simple words that you can think about all day long, and not have quit the effect on me as they were having right now.