Lament

"You wanted to see me, princess?"

I turned to see Jaedo standing, back towards me as always, by the open window. I'd opened the window and called out to him and then had gone back to my vanity to inspect while I waited for him. I did not wait long and now I stared at his large, masculine frame. There was something different about him, however. At first, as I looked at him, I was looking so hard I did not see it, but then I realized. His clothes were not tattered. His hair was brushed and glossy. He still had the same bright green wings, but now they did not look so menacing. So it was, with a surprised tone of voice, that I said to him, "You've changed!"

Jaedo squirmed and looked almost uncomfortable by my words. "Yes. Yes I have. Do you approve of the changes?" he asked.

"Well," I started, even more surprised by his words. When had he ever made any impression that he cared what I thought of him, at all? He was Unseelie, that's what he said, and before, before I'd really known him, back when I'd first met him and back when he'd given me those dreams, I'd believed him when he said he was of the Unseelie. Now he was changed. "Of course I approve of the changes. But I thought it wasn't in your...nature to ask for other's approval?" I questioned.

He once again shifted. "Being in London, helping you out...it is all having quite a strange effect on me. Of course, my intentions for coming to you, they were never...what my own family wanted, so I cast myself out of their good graces awhile ago. Still, it is strange, becoming this," at this, Jaedo's head turned so I could see his chin and blood-red lips, "this kind creature. Of course, they always knew what would happen to me so I suppose this isn't much of a surprise..." Jaedo trailed off and I felt myself frown.

"I cannot even begin to understand what you mean. I do have a favor to ask of you, and some questions, if you don't mind." Jaedo nodded; I took this as an affirmative. "First of all...tonight, Wren Morgenstern and I are going to be the esteemed guests of Alphonse and Jules to an Illuminata meeting. I was hoping you could follow along and try to..what is it you said you could do? Invade another person's mind? And see if anyone there has knowledge of Charles."

I saw him smile. "I know all about your plan to inflitrate the Illuminata dressed as men. Personally, when I heard, I was quite amused. Either way, I would be honored to invade the minds of the Illuminata. It is what I have been trying to do for a long while now, however, their minds are under lock and key. Most of the men do not know much about the others, no one knows the real leader, everyone simply gets an invitation stating where the next meeting is to be held. It's to confuse people who are trying to unveil their secrets, and they're doing a good job doing it. Tonight, all I need to do is follow you and listen in on each of their thoughts. See if anyone knows anything..."

"Thank you," I breathed in response. "How did you know of the plan to dress us up like dandies?" My mouth jerked in a smile at this.

"I have been keeping a close watch on Alphonse Wainwright." He paused to shrug. "Now, what were your questions?"

I inhaled deeply. "It is time you told me of the White Woman."

"Ah," responded Jaedo simply. He moved along the wall, away from the window that blew in hot early-summer air. "The White Woman. I suppose you should know. In the land where I was raised, Ireland, there is a name for this spirit. It is said that whenever death is near, she walks. And when death is upon her, the moon goes blood red and her screams can be heard for miles. In my land, she is called the Banshee. In this land, I am not so sure. I know of this spirit, however. When I left my woods and my court and my...family, I told them where I was going. They told me the story of the woman who was burned as a witch. Mary Morgenstern." Alphonse's voice, from a very long time ago, filtered through my brain. Words telling me of the story behind the 'Wainwright Curse' came to me. When we'd discovered there was no true curse, I'd thought the story as something that Charles had made up. A Wainwright had killed his lover's son - his lover was Mary Morgenstern. She'd accused him of murder and he'd accused her of witchcraft. She'd been hanged. "Since that time, Mary wanders the Wainwright moor, screaming whenever another son is slain thanks to the Wainwright greed."

"I see. And what of my mirror? The one that is supposed to link me to my mother's faerie parents? It does not work. I have tried everything."

This seemed to surprised Jaedo. "What? You only need to look at it and think of them and it should show you them. You say it does not work? Either the other mirror is broken and the link is lost, or..."

"Or what?" I urged.

"Or your mother's parents are dead."

I swallowed. "When Charles went to Ireland, he tricked my mother's parents - my grandparents, I suppose - into giving away the secret of faeries. Do you think it all possible that he killed them while he was there?"

"I think it entirely possible, princess." Jaedo's voice was quiet. "If that is the case, I need to return there as quickly as possible."

Something dropped in the pit of my stomach. "No! Please, you cannot go before we have found Charles and he is stopped. He plans to take my mother's heart and water it with Alphonse's blood and make a perfect homunculi of her. He cannot do that. I cannot let Alphonse die." Jaedo said nothing. "Please do not go before Charles is found."

"I will not go, of course I won't. I must finish this. It is not about only you, Faerie. There is much more involved here. Much that you still do not understand."

"Then explain it to me so I will understand!" I exclaimed, and then took in a sharp breath. I had to keep quiet. Lily lay quietly in another part of the house and if she heard me now and thought me ill, I would not be able to leave tonight. "Pardon me, sir. It is just difficult when you speak in riddles. I understood last November when the Morgensterns could not tell me all - they were bound by a blood oath. You, however, are not. And it frustrates me when you give me more questions than answers."

Jaedo sighed. "I apologize, but like you said before, I am Unseelie. I am other things as well, but for almost twenty years, Unseelie is what I have been. It is still difficult for me to be helpful the way you wish I was helpful. I am trying, however. And I will go with you tonight."

I sighed. "Thank you." The clock in my room struck ten times. "Alphonse's carriage will be here in an hour and I must change. Will you come to me tomorrow and tell me all you know?" Jaedo's only response was a nod. When I blinked, he was gone. With a sigh, I turned to my bed where a formal men's suit lay. Alphonse's. I stood in my nightgown and thick robe. I must change quickly, I knew this, but I also wished I had someone with me to help me change. Pushing that wish out of my head, I stripped down to my undergarments.

It took me the better part of the hour to figure out what piece of clothing went where and to get it on, but when I was finished, I had ten minutes to spare. Stealing a look at myself in the looking glass at my vanity, I suppressed a bark of laughter. I looked ridiculous. I felt even sillier. The clothes hung strangely on me, even though locked myself in my room all day and I'd done my best to hem them. The shoes were stuffed with some of my own hosier and were difficult to walk in. The weirdest part, though, were the breeches. It felt oddly satisfying to be wearing nothing but one layer of cloth. Walking around my room, I reveled in the freedom of movement the breeches gave me. When I came back to my dressing table, I pinned my hair up quickly and hid it under a top hat. Pulling the brim down low, I peeked at myself as best I could. In dark shadows, I might actually pass for a man. As long as I didn't talk.

From outside my open window, I heard the clip-clop of a carriage and a soft whiny of a horse. I swallowed and cracked the door open. The hall was dim. My footsteps echoed louder than I would have liked, but no one noticed as I made my way towards the door and slipped out.

Alphonse was waiting for me in front of his carriage, looking at something on the cobblestone street. As soon as he heard the door close, he looked up, and the biggest grin appeared on his face. I could feel my heart all the way in my toes and my head felt so light I might just float off. Surely I must have died and gone to heaven. There was no way Alphonse could be looking at me like this. I wanted to go to him and tell him to forget this, beg him to elope with me.

"You're positively dashing. You'd send all the ladies into a dither." Were his teasing words to me as I got closer.

"Thank you!" I laughed, with a roll of my eyes. Alphonse opened the door for me and inside were two other men. Except, upon further inspection, I saw that it was not two men per se, but Wren and Jules, locked in a low conversation that ended abruptly as the door opened. Jules looked up at me and the expression on his face made my heart drop once more - but not in happiness. I remembered one night when Prince Morgenstern had looked at his cousin with so much hatred at malice that it had chilled me to the heart. While this expression was hot and angry, it still gave me the same effect. Jules's face lightened at once, but I still felt troubled.

"Ah, there she is - or should I say he? This certainly is entertaining. However, I do think I like you better in a skirt and a corset my dear. Promise you won't go gallivanting off in my breeches when we're married?" Jules asked as I stepped in. All of a sudden, it hit me. I'm going to marry this man. Be with him forever. I could only nod a weak response as Alphonse got in. I looked at him. Alphonse. It didn't matter if he followed Charles, if somehow Charles managed to escape. I was getting married. Had I had some silly daydream that it wasn't actually going to happen? Yes. Who was I kidding? This was a terrible idea. Not even because the look that had been on Jules's face had terrified me, but because I didn't love him and never would.

My face turned to Wren whose own expression was unreadable. The carriage lurched into movement and Alphonse and Jules fell into a light conversation. My eyes stayed on Wren, who concentrated on the black outside world.

The distance between Lily's town house and wherever the Illuminata meeting was quite short and as we stepped out from the carriage (the men refrained from helping us down, and it gave me a certain amount of satisfaction to show them that I was entirely capable to get out of a carriage on my own) I could have sworn I saw the flash of green wings out of the corner of my eye. When I looked up, I saw we were at what looked like an old salon. Wren and I followed Alphonse and Jules, mindful of keeping our top hats down low in case we passed someone. It was then that I was finally able to have a private word with my sometimes friend. I turned my head ever so slightly towards Miss Morgenstern. "Are you all right?" I questioned. As a reply, she nodded curtly. My stomach turned and I held out a hand to stop her. "I am having a bad feeling about Jules. I fear there is something darker to him," I said to her.

I saw the flash of her sharp eyes under the brim of the hat. "You should have thought of that before you accepted his proposal, Miss Fae. I'm afraid I cannot help you, nor can I spare you any sympathy." With that, she continued forward. She was doing her best to imitate the swagger of a gentleman, but she was awkward. I kept my feet to myself, even though I knew I must still be walking like a female. I hurried to keep up with the rest of my party.

We were greeted at the door of the salon by another man whose face was hidden by a hat. He, Alphonse and Jules spoke in low tones, pointing and nodding to us. I held my breath. After what seemed like hours, the other man nodded and let us pass.

The inside of the salon was dingy and dark with only a few stubs of candles lighting the area. Alphonse, Jules, Wren and I followed the new man through the salon to the back where he opened a door. The door revealed a staircase lit poorly. I swallowed and plunged after my three fearless leaders, making sure my footing was even. I'd never walked down stairs uninhibited by skirts and petticoats before and my new-found freedom was a bit unnerving. I did manage to make it down unscathed, and we ended up in a celler lit by candles. All around the large room stood men in a circle - men whose faces were obscured by shadows and illusions. Alphonse stopped us. "We will go into the circle. You stay behind us, in the shadows. Listen and observe very carefully, but keep yourselves as unnoticed as possible."

I nodded and sank into the darkness behind them. We were risking everything by doing this, but I knew I would risk it all to make Alphonse safe.

The meeting began as one member brought up an issue and all the members were given a chance to remark on it. They spoke about things I had neither interest nor opinion about, until Jules brought up the Philosopher's Stone.

Each man had their own theory of it and I knew that the person who actually did know something about the Philsopher's Stone would never tell. I didn't want them to. I only wanted them to open their minds just enough for Jaedo to slip in and read their thoughts. It was a macabre idea, a man with green wings invading a person's mind, but still extremely useful. The men discussed and philosophized about the stone, its properties and its existence for a very long time. Those who actually believed in it - for many rejected the idea of it - relished in the idea of everlasting life. I wanted to laugh, curse them all as fools, but said nothing. Still, eventually they went down the road of another subject until the Philosopher's Stone was gone from their mind.

"Princess," I heard breathed in my ear. When I turned, I only saw a flash of green wings. I said nothing. "I read all of their thoughts. I could not find anything clear. It is as I have guessed - the person who was connected to Charles, the one Alphonse followed in Paris, he is gone. Either no one knows anything or the person that does know something is covering their thoughts quite carefully. However, I do bear some good news. I could not read their thoughts, so I sought inside their hearts. Someone in the Illuminata does have a strong connection to the hiding of Charles. Someone here, I can feel it..." Jaedo's voice trailed into a whisper and I knew he was gone. I turned my head, wondering if Wren had heard what I'd heard, but she was staring into the circle.

Someone in the Illuminata has a strong connection to the hiding of Charles. The words rang in my head. He could not figure out how, and he could not decipher where exactly. I knew, though, that it was only a matter a time. We must find this person as soon as possible.

Charles was simply biding his time. At the precise moment, he would strike. I did not know when. I did not know what would happen if he did. All I knew was that he would. And I must stop him.

I must.