Consciousness and Confidence

For an entire week, Brian stuck to his word. He didn't greet me, didn't tease me, nor did he acknowledge my presence at all.

I had convinced myself in the begining that this was what I wanted. But, to tell you the truth, being at home had become quite boring without him to pick a fight with.

Going out wasn't really an option for me either, because all there was to do was go to parties, and I didn't want to let myself fall back into that hole again. So, for the most part, I stayed at home. I went swimming in the pool or I read book. Sometimes, I even did both at the same time. I know, I'm an adventurous person.

Today was one of those days. I had sat myself right on the edge of the pool, so that my foot cold rest in the cool water while I reclined in my chair. The book I was re-reading called Aimee had captivated most of my attention.

"Ryyan!" I heard my brother call from inside, but I payed him no mind. I just continued to read. "Ryyan!" If he really wanted me he could get off his ass and come get me.

A few seconds later I heard my name being called for a third time, but this time by a different voice. "Ryyan, your brother wants you inside." For the first time in a week, he acknowledged my exsistance. It shouldn't have made me as happy as it did.

"Thanks Brian, I heard. Tell him he can come out here if he wants me so bad. Not send you." He nodded once and returned back inside the house. I went back to reading my book.

It didn't last very long before I heard feet slapping against the cement that surrounded the pool and my book got thrown out of my hands. I watched as it was chucked into the pool. Furious I turned around to scold my brother only to see that it was Jimmy who was there instead. "Hey! That was one of my favorite books you bone head!"

"Well, you deserved it." he countered.

"How?" I questioned, unable to see why he had to destroy one of my books.

"You've been home for a week and never even bothered to say hello to me!" he shouted, running up and enveloping me in a hug. I laughed and hugged back.

"I'm sorry Jimmy." I said from within the hug. "I've just been avoiding everyone lately."

He scoffed. "No, you've just been avoiding Brian. Unfortunately, he's my best friend so I get avoided also." I was baffled how he actually knew about that. I opened my mouth to ask when he spoke again. "Like I said, he's my best friend. He told me about your deal."

Finally, I pulled away from him. "Oh? Why would he do that."

"Because I got suspicious to the fact that every time I offered to chill at Matt's house, he would suggest another place instead." he explained.

"That hasn't stopped him from being around here." I replied, remembering a few times this week that I've seen him look right past me when walking into the kitchen.

"I said he suggested. He never actually persuaded me not to." I nodded in understanding at his words. "Anyways, why haven't you been spending your last few days of summer out with your friends?"

I shrugged. "I can't really hang out with them very much. All they want to do is go drink or smoke. I kind of quit this summer."

He smiled at me, and punched my shoulder lightly. "Way to go, kiddo. You make me proud."

I scowled at him while rubbing my sore shoulder. He was strong. "You sound like Matt now."

He laughed and draped his arm over my shoulder, slowly walking towards the kitchen entrance. "Good, I'm suppose to."

When I walked inside, I was slightly suprised to see all of the guys standing around the kitchen. Quickly, I assumed that they must have been here for band practice or something, even though I hadn't heard any instruments. However, in the corner of the room there was one other small body, who happened to look very upset.

"Ryyan Sanders you have a lot of explaining to do." JayJay's voice sounded throught the rooming, cutting off all other conversations. "You've ignored me all week, and I'm not taking any more of it!"

Her words didn't really have me paniced until Jimmy's grip around my shoulder switched to a stronger one around my waist. "Jimmy?" I questioned a bit scared, trying to remove myself from the situation.

"Oh no. You need to go out and have fun!" He began to push me towards the front door.

"I'm only in my bathing suit!" I argued, as we neared it. His pushing stopped.

"Fine." he sighed. "Go get changed. We're all going out to a little shin-dig."

I gave him a nervous glance as I walked to the stairs. "What about my new lifestyle choices?"

"Don't worry." he assured, "One of us will always be on the look-out for you." He winked before pushing me a bit more up the stairs to go get ready.

Well, what better way to prove my new sober lifestyle then to face it head on with temptation. That's how everyone does it, right?